Ukuchaneka njani ukuthetha ngokuncoma kumfazi

Wonke umntu uyazi ubuthakathaka besetyhini ngokuncoma. Ukunconywa yindlela yokubonisa ukunyaniseka, kwaye yiyiphi ibhinqa ayifuni ukuyiva?

Yaye unokubonisa njani oku, ukuba akunjalo ngoncedo lokuncoma. Akusikho into yokuba kukho intetho ethi ibhinqa lithanda izindlebe.

Wonke umfazi uthanda ukuva uvelwano kumntu owamdumisa ngento ethile, ngoko ngoncedo lokuncoma umntu unokufumana indawo kuye. Kodwa akubona bonke abantu abazi indlela yokuncoma umfazi.

Ucinga ukuba yintoni umfazi ofuna ukuva? Uze uzibeke endaweni yakhe-ungathanda ukuva ntoni? Nangona, ngokuqinisekileyo, ukukhetha ukuphumelela kukuncoma ngokubonakala, kuba ngamnye umfazi ufuna ukubukeka kakuhle, ngoko mxelela ngaye!

Musa ukuncoma xa ufuna enye into. Ibhinqa iqaphela ngokukhawuleza inzala yakho. Kunzima ukuva: "Ukhangelekile namhlanje, ngaba awuzange wenze ingxelo kum?" Ngoko ke, zincoma nje ngenxa yowesifazane kunye kwaye kaninzi kangangoko kunokwenzeka.

Ngelishwa, kumazwe atshisayo kuphela amandla okuncoma umntu oxutywa ngobisi lomama. Ukwenza into okokuqala ngoloyiko, sinokubambisa ukubaluleka okukhulu kwisiganeko esiqhelekileyo kwaye siyithathe ngokungathandekiyo. Uloyiko lokubonga luvela kukungaqiniseki. Abantu abaninzi bafuna ukuva ekuphenduleni kungekhona nje "mbulela", kodwa uluhlu lweemfanelo zabo. Kodwa akudingeki ukuba ugxininise kulo mcimbi ingqalelo. Ukuba awunalo amava aneleyo, bhekisa kwinconywa yokuqala njengobuliso obulula okanye uqale ukucela ukuncoma i-tet-a-tet, ngaphandle kwamangqina angadingekile. Ibhinqa ayiyi kuba yinto enzima kwaye iya kukuxolela ubuncinane. Ewe, ukuba uthembele kuwe kunye nenkosi yokuncoma, ngoko phambi kwabanye abantu ukuncoma kwakho kuya kwenza ngakumbi.

Fumana ithuba lokuncoma lingahlala likhona: ngokuba kuwo wonke umntu kukho into enhle. Smile, amehlo, izandla, isikhwama, iinwele, ewe, nantoni na. Ewe, xelela umfazi ngale nto! Kodwa ungagxininisi kwisifundo; Akudingeki ukuba uthi: "Yisiphi isikhwama esihle." Kuya kuba ngcono xa ugxininisa: "Uhamba njani le sikhwama?" Emva koko, ezininzi izikhwama, kodwa yena enekhwele-enye!

Akulungile ukucacisa ukuncoma, ngoko bavakala ngokunyanisekileyo, ngabanye. Emva kwegama eliqhelekileyo, faka umjikelo "ngokuba". "Namhlanje ubukeka bumnandi, kuba ..." Kwaye ibhinqa liya kuqonda ngokukhawuleza ukuba inwele yakhe entsha (isitya, isikhwama, njl njl.) Ayizange ihlale ingabonwa. Naluphi na ukuncoma kunokomelezwa ngokungongeza isichazi "yintoni." "Yisiphi isikhwama esimangalisayo unayo" Isiphumo esifanayo sinokufezwa ngokufaka amagama athi "kakhulu" kunye "neninzi".

Ngaphambi kokuba uthethe ukuncoma, qiniseka ukuba uphulaphule. Kule meko, qiniseka ukujonga kwamehlo. Ibhinqa kufuneka iqonde ukuba le ngcomo yedwa kuphela. Ixabiso elikhulu lingadlala isikhalazo ngamagama. Impendulo egameni iyenzeka kwizinga le-reflex kwaye kunokwenzeka ukuva.

Namela ingqalelo kunye nesimo sombuso. Ukumamatheka kuyadingeka, kodwa ngokumodareyitha. Ivulekile kakhulu iya kubonakala ngathi ihlazo. Musa ukwakha ibinzana elide, zama ukugcina phakathi kwamagama amabini. Ukuba unomnqweno wokwakha ukuncoma, ubeka umngcipheko ukungaqondwa, ngaphandle koko akuyikuvuyela. Ingqiqo yenxalenye kufuneka ihlale ikhona. Musa ukuzibamba. Akukho nto embi kakhulu xa umntu etshazela ukunyanzela kumfazi okanye apho impendulo ibhekiswa khona. Akudingeki ukuba ucinezele loo ntokazi kumdonga kwaye uluhlu lwamaxabiso akhe okubodwa: oku kuya kubangela kuphela into embi.

Nceda uqaphele ukuba ukuncoma akunakuguqulwa , mhlawumbi kuya kuba yinto yokudlala. Kwaye nabasetyhini banokubamba ngokukhawuleza lo mgca, kuba umlinganiselo wabo wokulinganisa uphuculo olungcono. Emva koko unokuthi uthathwa njengomntu onamandla, kunye ne-sycophant kwaye uthemba ukuba awuyi kuba. Ukuba umfazi unesiphene, akudingeki uzame ukuthetha nantoni na ngale mpazamo, kulungele ngakumbi ukuba ungayiboni.

Qaphela ngamazwi-izigulana, ezifana ne "ee", "kakuhle." Kubukeka ngathi ungayazi into oyithethayo, okanye uloyiko lokuba ayiyi kubongeza kwisibeleko sakho.

Njalo uqaphele i-intonation, uthetha ngelizwi elincomekayo. Kodwa akukho mfuneko yokukhawuleza ukunyamekela, kwaye konke okungafanelekanga ukucinywa, oku kuvunyelwe kuphela phakathi kwabahlobo, okuphelelwe ngokupheleleyo kwiindawo ezahlukeneyo zobudlelwane.

Musa ukuba yinto encinane , into leyo intombazana eye yakuva kaninzi, akunakwenzeka ukuba inomdla. Cinga ngento ethile yokuncoma. Mhlawumbi uqaphele into endikwaziyo okwamanje, enye yamalungelo akhe. Ekugqibeleni, udumise ukukwazi ukugqoka, ngenxa yesimo sakhe sokugqoka, wafika kunye naye. Ukuya kwindawo ethile, zonke iintombazana zibeka ukwakheka ukwenzela ukuba kugxininise ezinye zezinto zazo. Kwaye kufuneka uqaphele oku kuphela, ingqalelo nje. Ngokomzekelo, ukhetho lokuphumelela kukuthi umbala wekhwamkhwa ufana nezicathulo okanye umlomo wokugcoba nge-varnish kwiikhonkwane. Kwaye ke intombazana ayiyi kuphulaphula kuphela inkomfa yakho, kodwa, ngokuchaseneyo, uya kuthi uyinanto.

Akunakwenzeka ukuba enze ukuncoma kwindlela yokucebisa, ethi intombazana inegunya lemilingo kwaye idonsa amadoda kuye. Kubalulekile ukuba ungadluli, kuba ukuba ubamba ubuqhetseba, zonke izibongozo zangaphambili ze ntombazana ziza kuhlaziya. Kodwa ukuba umntu ubona kwintombi yakhe unkulunkulukazi, ke akayikuqalekisa umphefumlo kwaye uya kukholisa.

Kodwa, qaphela, ukuba ngenxa yezizathu ezithile unobungozi obubi kunye nomfazi, ngoko ukuncoma kufanelekileyo kuphela kwiimeko eziqhelekileyo, iintetho, njl. Ngaloo ndlela, vele uhloniphe kwaye ubone indlela eya kufikelela ngayo.

Ngaloo ndlela, ngamnye umntu kufuneka aqonde indlela yokuncoma abafazi. Kodwa musa ukulibala ukuba bonke abafazi bahluke kwaye bahlukile, yingakho iincoma kufuneka zibe yintsusa kuwo onke amabhinqa nakwiindawo. Yenza uncomelo entliziyweni, ungayifaki njengenjongo, ungazibali izibonelelo. Asazi indlela yokuphucula ubomi bethu ngakumbi, mhlawumbi umfazi owamncoma kusasa, into eyakunceda kwikamva. Kholelwa ukuba kungekudala okanye kamva, kodwa kubuya okuhle.