Ulwalamano lwethu nomntu othandekayo luye ludla kangangoko ngenxa yokunyaniseka ... kwaye ngokwenene yintoni inyani, ukunyeliseka, ukuthembela kulwalamano? Ndimele ndenze ukugcinwa kwangaphambili ukuba ndiveze ngombono wam nje kule ngxaki, ndiqonda ngokucacileyo ukuba ukuchazwa ngokuthe ngqo kwimibuzo yokunyaniseka, ukunyeliseka nokuthembela kwezobudlelwane kuxhaphakileyo kuluntu.
Inkolelo yam enzulu, akukho ukunyeliswa kuyo yonke into - kukho ukunyaniseka komnye nomnye, iinjongo ezidibeneyo kunye nezicwangciso zekamva - yizona eziqinisekisa ukuzithemba kwimbini kunye nokuzinza kulwalamano. Ukutshatyalaliswa - oku kwenzekayo kwintlanano yentsapho kaninzi, kwaye awukwazi ukubeka uphawu olulinganayo phakathi kokungcatsha nokungcatsha, ezi zinto zihluke ngokupheleleyo.
Yintoni edlalwa njengento yokugwenxa?
Uhambo oluya ngakwesobunxele lomnye wabatshati okanye amalungu omanyano odibeneyo. Ngokuqhelekileyo bathetha ngokungcatsha kwamadoda, kanti nabasetyhini baya kwinqanaba elifanayo, bahlala becala kakhulu. Ubuncinane kuba umfazi osebenzayo kwaye, ngaphandle kwendoda yakhe, naye omnye okanye ababini abantwana, akukho nto ikhoyo
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Ngoko, nangomnqweno oqinileyo wokuphumeza ngokwenyama le "ntloni" ayiyi kuphumelela. Ngoko umbuzo uvela nokuba uthembekile okanye ukungabikho kwamathuba okwenza isenzo sokungcatsha, kwaye luhlobo luni lokuthembela kulwalamano olunokuthi lube khona ukuba ibhinqa "liboshwe" kwidyokhwe kwaye idonsa ubomi?
Indoda esatshatileyo ihlala iselula kwaye ikhululekile. Yiya kuyo nayiphi na indawo yokuthandana - kukho ukucinga ukuba kukho amadoda athile abatshatileyo abhalisiweyo kunokuba bafuna umphefumlo wabo. Kutheni ?? Ukuba abantu abatshatileyo bafuna i-sex kuphela, kuthetha ukuba abalala ngesini somtshato. Yintoni enomdla kakhulu, amava omtshato angabakho ukususela kwi-zero ukuya ngaphantsi.
Yintoni ichaza "zhenatiki" ukunganeliseki okunjalo? "Umfazi akazi ukuba njani okanye akafuni ukwenza oku okanye ukuba ... Uxakeke kakhulu ... Sineempawu ezahlukileyo ... Akukho zesini kunye nomfazi ... Umfazi isonka, kodwa ufuna ngezinye izikhathi ..."
Ndiqinisekisa ukuba, umfazi osetshatileyo angenza uluhlu olupheleleyo lwezesondo kunye nomyeni wakhe, eqinisweni, akusona isizathu sokufumana ukwaneliseka kweemfuno zabo kwicala. Ukuphanda amava olwalamano lwentsapho phakathi kwabahlobo bakho nabaziwayo, ufike kwisigqibo sokuba umfazi otshatileyo unako ukulala ngesinye indoda (anditsho ukukrexeza), kwiimeko ezizodwa.
Ukuziphatha okubi ngokuchasene nokunciphisa amathuba
Nayiphi na ubudlelwane, nokuba umtshato womthetho okanye umbutho, okanye umtshato, kwaye kunjalo ... uchaza ukunciphisa inkululeko yabantu bonke abangena kwimanyano. Kwaye ukuba sinokucinga ukuba wonke umntu unokufumana uvuyo, kuphela ukukhululeka, kuya kuba ngcono kuwo wonke umntu ukuba akukho zithintelo kwinkululeko kwimanyano yabambini.Hayi, akuyona into engcolileyo. Ukuziphatha kakubi ukutshutshisa abathandekayo bakho kwaye uvelise ubuchopho babo kumona wabo kwaye bawenze baxoke baze baqikelele. Kukho ukuziphatha okubi ukulahla isiqingatha sesini ngenxa yecala, okanye ngenxa yesigxala esingathinti ubuhlobo obusondeleyo. Ewe, ukubuyela kwinto yokuba ukungcatsha ngokusemthethweni, akunako.
Akunjalo yonke imibutho yentsapho isekelwe eluthandweni, ingenokuba yintsusa, inokudlulela ngexesha ... Luhlobo luni lobuthixo esinokuthetha ngalo? Ubundlobongela kwicala liphela ngesondo kwicala. Yaye ukuba unemvakalelo, ngoko isondo kwicala - le nto ayikho into ekhohlakeleyo, isondo nje kuphela, kuba awufanele udibanise uthando kunye nesondo.
Ukuqonda othandayo ...
Kubalulekile ukuzama ukuqonda intanda yakho (intanda). Umntu omnye akanako ukwanelisa zonke iimfuno zomnye, nokuba ngumthandayo. Ngako oko, akudingeki ukuba "uyondle" umthandayo, makumvumele umntu anelisekile ukuzanelisa iimfuno zakhe ukuya phezulu, ngoko uya kuziziva engcono, kwaye oku kuya kuba nempembelelo entle kulwalamano lwakho. Kuphela kukho konke kufuneka kube nokulingana, oko kukuthi, inkululeko kufuneka ifumaneke kubo bobabini.
Oku kunzima ukuyiqonda nokwamkela. Kodwa, xa ungayisebenzisa ebomini bakho, uya kuziva unonwabo ngokukhawuleza. Musa ukuzithuthuzela kunye nomthandane wakho ngomona, kuba umona awubonakaliso wothando. Umthandayo akayiyo impahla yakho, unikwe yona ukuze ujabule ukuba usekufuphi.
Uyakubona, ulive, uphefumle ngomoya omnye! Lo uvuyo! Ngoko musa ukuphazamisa uvuyo lwakho ngomona. Inzondo iyonakalisa ubudlelwane kwaye ibulale imizwa. Ukunyamekela iimvakalelo zakho neemvakalelo zakho, u thembele kubo, musa ukuzivavanya, musa ukukrokra nantoni na. Cinga ngendlela ubomi bakho buya kutshintsha ngayo xa uyeka ukuthanda lo mntu, kwaye ukuba uyazibulala, ngaba uya kuvuya ngakumbi?
Ukuphila emtshatweni ngaphandle kothando kunzima, kwaye ngokuqhelekileyo akupheli kakuhle. Ukuba ubudlelwane bubalulekile kubathandekayo bakho, phinda nje ngomthandazo: "Ndiyomdla kuphela kum lam nolwalamntu ondibathandayo, kungekhona ebuhlotsheni bakhe nomnye umntu, kuba mna akukho nto ibaluleke ngakumbi kwaye ibiza ngaphezu kobuhlobo. Kwaye andisoze ndiwaphazamise ngamanxuwa, kuba umona ubonakaliso bumnini, kungekhona uthando.
"Ukuba ndikhwele, andithandi."
Oku kunzima ukufunda, kodwa, xa ufunde, uya kuziva ukhululekile. Nangona kuphela umntu ovela kumanyano ufikelela eziphakamileyo, ubudlelwane buya kuba namandla kwaye buhlale buhlala njalo. Enye into, ukuba le mvakalelo ayikho ...