Ungakuphepha njani ukungqubana phakathi kwendoda nomfazi? Ukuze uphendule lo mbuzo kufuneka uqonde izizathu zayo kuqala. Kwaye ke, amadoda nabasetyhini bacinga ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo, baneengcamango ezahlukeneyo kwaye, ngokufanelekileyo, izenzo zabo.
Ukuba umntu ujwayele ukucinga nokusebenza okungakumbi, umfazi kulo mzekelo unika iimvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo. Kwakhona, izizathu zokungquzulana azihloneli omnye nomnye, ukungafuni ukuncedana, ukuqonda okuhlukile kwegama elithi "uthando". Kwabanye, uthando lukuthandana ngokwesondo, kunye nomntu - ukulwa nolwalamano, ubuhlobo. Sekunjalo kubalulekile ukuba uqwalasele ukuba ezininzi iimpikiswano zivela ngephoso yabasetyhini, njengoko bezama ukwenza "ukukhawuleza" okanye "ukuphindezela". Amadoda akwazi ukufumana indlela eyakhayo evela kwimeko ethile.
Xa umntu enenkathazo, uqala ukucinga ingxaki yokuzixazulula njani, uya "ngaphakathi kuye" kwaye yonke into ejikelezileyo iqhutyelwe kwimvelaphi. Eli bhinqa liyaqaphela oku kwaye liqala ukukhangela iingxaki kuye, liqala ukucinga ukuba akayithokozisi, ukuba ufuna ukumshiya, njl njl. Kwaye ke yintoni? Emva koko uzama ukuyijonga yonke into! Ukuthotyelwa kuqala, ukuphanda ngemibuzo kunye ngokuchanekileyo ngaloo mizuzu xa kufuneka ukuba yedwa. Uyayabela njani? Ngokuqinisekileyo, akayi kuthanda, kwaye uya kwenza konke okusemandleni akhe, akhuphe ukungqubuzana, agxininise ukuba uphukisiwe kwaye ushiye yena. Indoda iya kusombulula yonke imicimbi yakhe, ukuphumla kwakhona kwaye iya kuba ilungele ukuvumela abathandekayo bakhe ebomini bakhe ...
Yintoni abanye abesifazana, abo abangacingi ukuba kuyimfuneko ukunyathela intloko yakho okanye abo banokuzithemba? Baqala ukuziqhelanisa, baya kwiironi ezahlukeneyo, bathenge izinto ezininzi kunye nezinto ezininzi zokuzonwabisa kwabo. Bahamba nabahlobo kuzo zonke iintlobo zokuzonwabisa. Abacingi ngemiphumo, musa ukuvalela iintloko zabo ngeengcamango ezingadingekile. Kwaye xa umntu ekulungele ukuthobela isigxina sakhe sesibini, ubonakala phambi kwakhe ezolile, waphumula. Yaye ibonisa i-caress kunye nokunyamekela indoda xa eyidinga. Kwaye konke kulungile kubo.
Sisiphi isisombululo? Ukuzibophezela kwaye uzame ukufumana into eyenziwe yindoda okanye "ukuhamba kunye nokuhamba" kwaye ulinde kude kube yintoni na isigqibo?
Kufuneka ube nokuqonda kunye nothando, ukwazi ukuqikelela ixesha xa umntu wakho othandekayo efuna ukuba yedwa, kwaye oku akunjalo ngenxa yokuba loo nto ibhinqa umfazi, hayi, amadoda amele ahlelwe njalo, ngenye indlela bafumana nzima ukulungisa iingxaki zabo. Kubalulekile ukuba imeko ebudeni ukuba ibe kufuphi kwaye ukuba ufuna ukuthetha ngoko ukwazi ukuphulaphula ngokuthula, ngoko ukuba isigqibo sengxaki siya kuxazulula, kuba emva kokuba incoko ilahlekile sele isimo sokubaluleka. Kwakhona akufuneki ukulibala malunga nawe, zinike ukuphumla, zibeke ngokwakho.
Akunjalo kwimiba engqubuzanayo, umntu akakwazi ukuhlambalaza, zama ukukhubekisa. Nangona uyazi ukuba ulungile, zama ukumomotheka kwaye ubone ukuba ukungavumelani kukonakala.
Ukuze uphephe ukungquzulana, kubalulekile ukuphulaphulelana, uhloniphe izimvo zabathandekayo babo kwaye, ngokwenene, bafune ukuphazamiseka. Mhlawumbi oku kuyona nto inzima kunxulumano, kodwa nguwe kuphela onako ukwakha ubudlelwane obuhle kuwe, ukuba ukhetha.