Ngokwezibalo, phantse isiqingatha sabasetyhini abatshatileyo bayaqiniseka ukuba umntwana akaqhagamshelani noyise ngokwaneleyo. Into ebangel 'umdla kukuba amadoda ayaqaphela le nto. Nangona kunjalo, kuphela ngama-36%. Bonke abanye bayaqiniseka ukuba bahlawula ingqalelo esondeleyo kubantwana. Ngelo xesha, malunga ne-12% yabasetyhini bathi amadoda abo ayenzi nje abantwana, kodwa ngokuqhelekileyo baziphathe ngokungathi bangenabantwana. Ngendlela, eJamani naseHungary kuphela i-2% yabameli bezesondo ezibuthakathaka bayamangalela amadoda ekungafezekisi umsebenzi waboyise. Kukhona into enokucinga ngayo, akunjalo?
Unyana-ubuhlobo, intombi-indumiso
Iingcali zengqondo ziqinisekile: abantwana banoma yiyiphi iminyaka badinga uthando kunye nokunakekelwa nguyise. Nawuphi na wesini. Ngokutsho kweengcali, ukuba le nkwenkwe ayiyiva inkxaso yesoba, "iyakuthatha" indlela yokuziphatha yomama, apho inxaxheba yindoda ilula. Ngenxa yoko, loo nkwenkwe ayikwazi nje ukuguquka "yindodana kamama", kodwa, njengomdala, yakha intsapho ephantsi. Emva koko, ukuze ube ngumntu, akwanele ukuba azalwe ngumntu - ufuna kwakhona umzekelo. Inkwenkwe kufuneka iziva njengendoda, yenza njengomntu, njl.
Amantombazana abe nolwalamano lwabo nopapa. Emva koko, uyise unceda intombi yakhe ukuba iyayiqonda ukuba inhle, ihlakaniphile, iphumelele. Umama unokuphinda iphindwe kabini ukuba intombi ihle kwaye ihlakaniphe, kodwa uya kuphelelwa yila magama. Ukuba uyise uyancoma intombi, intombi iyakumkhumbula ixesha elide, kwaye eyona nto ibalulekileyo - iya kukholelwa ukuba uyayilumkile kwaye inhle.
Ukongezelela, intombazana ifuna ukuba kubone abo bakhethayo iimpawu ezifana noyise. Oko kukuthi, ngupapa oba yinqaba apho bonke abaviwa kufuneka baxhamle esandleni sakhe nangentliziyo ...
Yingakho kubaluleke kakhulu ukukrazula umyeni wakho kude nephephandaba lakho ozithandayo kunye neTV, ukumkhumbuza ukuba unomntwana owufunayo (unokumtshintsha ukuba ufunde le tekisi). Iingcali zengqondo zikholelwa ukuba, nokuba uyise uya kunika inzala yakhe imihla ngemizuzu engama-30 kuphela, umntwana uya kuziva ekhuselekile, ethembekileyo kwaye evuya. Yintoni abantwana abayilindele kuboyise?
Ubuntwaneni, into ebaluleke kakhulu kukubona nokuziva kungekhona kuphela umama, kodwa noyise. Izifundo zibonise ukuba iintsana, ootata abo bathatha inxalenye echaphazelekayo ekukhuliseni kwabo, abanako ukukhala, abamesabi abantu abangaziwayo, bakhululekile. Ngoko ke, ngeli nqanaba, upapa ufuna enye into, eqinisweni, evela kunina - ukuba athabathe umntwana ngokuphindaphindiweyo ezandleni zakhe, ambethe, athethe naye. Vumela intsana ingaqondi ukuba ubaba uyayigxotha kuye, kodwa uya kubamba intetho. Ngoko uvuselele indoda yakho ukuba ingesabi ngunyana okanye intombi encinci (amadoda amaninzi awathabathe abantwana kwiingalo zawo, ephikisana nabo ukuba bangalimaza ngengozi). Bonisa umfazi wakho indlela yokubamba kakuhle umntwana, ukuhlamba, ukutya, njl.
Okubi nakakhulu, ukuba umntu ubona intsana njengomncintiswano, weba isabelo seengonyama. Kule meko, vumela umyeni wakho aqonde ukuba uyaqonda ukuba kunzima kangakanani kuye-isisitho sikayise senziwa ngokukhawuleza, kwaye maxa wambi akulula ukufumana ubunzima bakhe. Nangona kunjalo, cacisa kumlingane ukuba uthando lomntwana aluyikuthi luthintele uthando lwakho ngaye.
Yaye uqaphele ngakumbi ngeli xesha ukuya ethembekileyo. Njengoko ifunyanwe yizinzululwazi zaseBrithani naseMerika, ama-5% ngamadoda amaxesha athile akhula .... Ukuba ubona ukuba lakho iqabane, emva kokuzalwa komntwana, lugqubuzele okanye, ngokuchaseneyo, lugxininise, mbizele kwingxoxo engathethekiyo (nokuba bhetele, ncokola nomgqirha). Emva koko, le ndlela yokuziphatha yendoda yakhe ayinakuchukumisela impilo yakhe kuphela, kodwa nangenxa yempilo ... umntwana. Ngokwezinzululwazi, phakathi kwamakhwenkwe aneminyaka engama-3-5 ubudala, iingxaki zokuziphatha zaziphindwe kabili kwezihlandlo eziqhelekileyo kulabo ootata babecinezelekile emva kokubeleka. (Kwintombazana, nangona kunjalo, le mpawu yayingabonakali kangako.) Kubonakala ukuba, ekuqaleni abafazi babe neengqondo ezinamandla ...)
Ngoko isiphetho silula: umntwana kufuneka abone ubaba ngendlela enhle! Nangona unomsebenzi emsebenzini. Nangona iqela lakhe lebhola lebhola elidlalayo lilahlekile ngeakhawunti ehlazo. Nangona i-carpric cruci ikhupha i-bait ekulobeni, kwaye uninazala uthetha ngamazinyo ngenyanga ...
Izihlanu ukuya kwisithoba: musa ngaphandle kokugxekwa!
Ngeli xesha, upapa ungadlala nomntwana kwimidlalo esebenzayo. Ewe, nakwibhola okanye kwiHockey efanayo (ngeendlela, amantombazana amaninzi ayigxotha ibhola kunye nepake ngokuzithandela). Siqinisekisa ukuba onke macala aya kuneliseka!
Kukho omnye "umphumo osisigxina" wale nxibelelwano. Ngokweziphumo zophando, ootata ngexesha le midlalo banikela ngakumbi umntwana kunomama. Abameli bezesondo ezinamandla bavumela abantwana ukuba bazame, bazi ihlabathi elijikelezile. Umama, njengomgaqo, ngoku uye umnciphise umntwana: "Musa ukuya khona, kuyingozi!", "Phuma emthini, uya kuwa!", "Phumani emkhatsini - uya kufumana iinyawo zakho zimanzi," njl njl.
Nangona kunjalo, ngelixa umntwana eyazi ihlabathi elijikelezile, uyise makafanele ukugxeka umntwana. Ngaphandle koko, umntwana akanakuyonwabela umdlalo. Kungcono ukumdumisa ngenxa yeempumelelo zakhe - oku kuya kumkhuthaza. Ngoko ke, akukho zihlandlo ezinjengalezi: "Suka, awukwazi ukunyuka kwi-tightrope!" Okanye "Ewe, ngubani obanika ibhola! Ziziphi izandla zakho zikhula! ". Ukuba umntwana akaphumelelanga, kufuneka sibonise ukuba njani kwaye senze njani.
Olunye umsebenzi ohloniphekileyo onokunikezelwa kumyeni kukuqhutywa kwezifundo. Akuyimfuneko ukuba uhlale phantsi komntwana, kodwa ukuba ukhangele ukuba unyana usombulule ingxaki kwimathematika ngokuchanekileyo, uPapa uyakwazi ngokufanelekileyo (kwaye umama okwangoku unokupheka ngokuphephile i-macaroni okanye ahlambe impahla).
Buza umyeni wakho ukuba atyelele ingqalelo yakho ukuba unomntwana onokufundela. Ngeli xesha, ukuchonga kwezesondo kwenzeka - inkqubo eyinkimbinkimbi xa intombazana "ifunda" kwaye "ibamba" ukuziphatha komama, inkwenkwana - uyise. Buza umyeni wakho ukuba alumke kakhulu unyana wakhe. Maye bathethe ngokuphindaphindiweyo malunga nento yabo, amadoda, bahambe kunye nokuhamba, njl.
Ukususela kwi-9 ukuya kweyishumi elinesihlanu: kuba ngabahlobo!
Ngeli xesha, indima kayise inkulu ngakumbi. Nguye upapa odla ngokuba yingcali kwiingxaki zesikolo. Nguye ofundisa unyana wakhe indlela yokuziphatha kunye noontanga (kwaye, ukuba kuyimfuneko, uchaza indlela yokuzikhusela). Nguye oxelela inkwenkwe malunga neenguqu zezinto eziphilayo ezilindele kuye (kunye nentombazana kwizinto ezithandana naye kukulungele ukuthetha nomama).
Enyanisweni, ngamanye amaxesha kwenzeka okuchaseneyo-ubuhlobo bonyana kunye nobaba ngeli xesha libuhlungu kakhulu. Iingcali zengqondo zibonisa ukuba into yokuba intombazana, ebona kwisehlo yokhuphiswano, izama ukubonisa ubungqina kuye nakuzo zonke izikhundla zakhe. Yaye ukuba uyise, naye, ufuna "ukumnyanzela kwiphonkwane," ubudlelwane obuhle bunokuphazamiseka. Ngako oko, owona mgangatho ophezulu kwixesha elivisayo kukuba uhambelane nomgaqo-nkqubo wokungathathi hlangothi. Iseluleko esinokuthi sinokufumana, isisongelo - ayikho.
Ulwalamano lobawo nentombi yeshumi elivisayo ngokuqhelekileyo liyihloko ehlukeneyo. Abaninzi abameli besondo esinamandla banamahloni ukuhlamba iintombi zabo, nangona bazinyanga ezintandathu. Xa ibhinqa lijika lilishumi elinesihlanu kwaye iqala ukupenda umlomo wayo, yambathe iingubo ezimfutshane kwaye udibane nabafana, obawo balala ngokubanzi. Indlela yokuziphatha ngayo? Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuhlwaya kwaye xa kunokwenzeka, njani? Awukwazi ukuyifaka ekhoneni, awukwazi ukubetha indawo epholileyo - emva koko, phantse intombazana ... Okanye kungcono ukuba ufake ngokukhawuleza kwindlu?
Ootata abaninzi, abazange bafumane iimpendulo zale mibuzo, basuswa kuphela kwintombi yabo endala, befihla ukungahambi kwabo ngenxa yobuqhetseba babo obude. Nangona kunjalo, ngokweengcali zeengqondo, le mpazamo enkulu! Eyona ndlela, intombazana, ehlazeka yimpapa, iya "kuguqula" imali kuye. Okubi nakakhulu, wayeya kumcaphukisa uyise ngenxa yokungakhathaleli. Akayiqondi isizathu sokuba wahlaselwa ngokukhawuleza ...
Into eyenzayo indoda yakho enokuyenza ngeli xesha kukuba ube ngumhlobo nentombi yakhe. Ukuba wenze into eyenziwa ngokungathandekiyo, ubaba unako kwaye kufuneka akhulume naye, achaze isizathu sokuba wenza into engalunganga (ngentombi, umbono kabawo ubaluleke kakhulu!). Kodwa awukwazi ukuhlazisa intombi yakho - iya kumnika ubunzima bokuphila.