Ngoko, makhe sijonge imeko ngokubanzi. Ukuze ufunde indlela yokuqinisekisa abafana ukuba uyabathanda, uthethe ngokunyanisekileyo ukuba yintoni imbangela yeso simo sengqondo yomfana.
Ikhetho lokuqala - ixesha elide waluphika iimvakalelo zakho ngaye, kwaye wacinga ukuba ayihambisani nawe. Ukuba umntu osemncinci wazama ukwenza ingqalelo yakho ixesha elide, wenza konke okusemandleni akho kwaye akunakwenzeka kuwe, kwaye wayoloko uyayichasa, kwaye mhlawumbi wahlazisa, ngoko ke, mhlawumbi, le nto yayifumene ukuba ayikwazi ukuhlaziswa, kwaye awusoze wamthanda. Ngoko ngoku, xa ufumanisa ukuba kukho iimvakalelo, akafuni ukukholelwa kuyo, ukuze ungadani kwakhona kwakhona kwaye ungayiphuli intliziyo yakho. Ngoko ngoku uya kufuneka wenze imizamo emininzi ukuze umkholise iimvakalelo ezinyanisekileyo. Ewe, asixubulanga ngokuthotywa kwaye sibe yikhoboka, olungele ukufezekisa enye yeeminqweno zakhe aze asebenze nayiphi na ifowuni. Udinga ukubonisa ukuba kubalulekile kuwe, kwaye ulungele ukumnceda, ukuxhasa, ukwabelana nazo zonke iingxaki kunye neminqweno, kwaye uyazixabisa izenzo zakhe kuwe. Ukongezelela, kufuneka uxolise ukuba uyayazi into ephosakeleyo ngayo, uhlaziswe okanye uhlambalaze isidima sakhe. Khumbula ukuba kumntu, ukuzithethelela kubaluleke kakhulu kwaye xa umfazi ehlawula emehlweni akhe, kwaye ngakumbi nakakhulu, emehlweni abo bahlobo, uyamkhathaza kakhulu kwaye akakwazi ukuxolela ukuziphatha okunjalo ixesha elide.
Ngoko ke, kufuneka ube nesineke nokuqonda. Musa ukugweba ukukrokra nokubanda. Khumbula ukuba iimvakalelo zangempela azidluli ngokukhawuleza kwaye zilula. Kodwa ngoku lixesha lokuba aphinde awamvume yena ngokwakhe, kodwa kuwe. Zama zonke izenzo zakhe "zizame" kwaye ngaphambi kokuba ucaphuke okanye ukhubekise, cinga ngendlela oya kwenza ngayo kwimeko efanayo. Oku kuya kukunceda ukuba ungayinqumli kwihlombe, kodwa ukuqonda nokumnceda ukuba akholelwe ukuba uyayixabisa ngokwenene iimvakalelo zakhe kunye nolwalamano lwakho, kwaye unomdla wokwenene kuye.
Umntu unokuyeka ukukholelwa ukuba uyamthanda kwenye imeko. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba ufumene ukuba uthetha izinto ezimbi ngaye ngaye isangqa sahlobo kunye nabaziyo ngaye. Ukuba ukwenene ngokwenene, ngoko imeko ayiyona nto ingcono kakhulu. Sonke siyazi ukuba uphukiswe ngumntu, siqala ukunyanisela yonke into kwaye sithetha ezo zinto esizicingayo ngokwenene. Xa kuziwa kwinto yokuxubusha, kubonakala kunzima. Ngenxa yesi sizathu, okokuqala, khumbula ikusasa: akukaze kulungele ukuthetha kumntu, nokuba ngumsindo onobubele, izinto ezingathandekiyo ngomthandayo. Nangona uthembela kumnxibelelwano kwaye uyazi ukuba akayi kumxelela mntu, akufanele unikezele ukuba kungenzeka ukuba amagama akho aya kufumana umfana. Oku kungabikho ingozi ekhohlakeleyo, kunye nobubi. Ngoko uzama ukugcina yonke into kuwe, njengokungathi ayilanga emphefumlweni wakho. Ingcono uthetha ebusweni bakhe kwaye uzama ukujonga imeko. Nangona xa sele ecaphukile nawe, kuya kuba nehlazo kwaye uza kuxabana, kuya kuba ngcono kunokuba uya kufunda malunga nantoni zonke ezandleni zeshumi. Khumbula ukuba inkohlakalo iphosakekile, idlula kumntu ukuya kumntu kwaye umntu angathetha nezinto ongazange uzikhankanye. Kodwa akayi kukholwa ukuba kwakungekho, ngokwenene into ayifunayo yinyaniso. Zama ukuzinqanda kwaye nangona umntu ekubuza, tshela ukuba konke kulungile kwaye uya kuqonda. Ngoko uya kuzigcina kwiingxabano ezinkulu kwaye ungathembeki kwinxalenye yomntu oyithandayo ngokwenene, nangona xa uphelelwa ngumsindo kwaye ulungele ukubulala.
Ukuba uthe ushilo into embi, kukulungele ukuyivuma. Inyaniso iya kuvuleka, kwaye ubuxoki obuninzi buya kuba ngumqobo owenzela umfana wakho.
Ngoko ke, ukuba uqale, uqokelele intando kwiqonga uze umxelele konke okuthethile ngoko. Kwaye ngokukhawuleza uchaze ukuba kutheni kwenzeka njalo. Ukuba uqala ukumangalela ngokukhohlisa nokungcatsha, musa ukuphika ityala lakho. Yivume ukuba inene imbi kakhulu kwaye ingalunganga, ngoko uyazisola kwaye uqonde ukuba unelungelo lokukrakra. Yithi awufuni ukukwenza oku, kodwa wenza kwaye ngoku uqonda ukuba kwakungalunganga kwaye kubi. Ndixelele ukuba uye waqonda yakho impazamo kwaye akayi kuphinda uyiphinde. Ewe, lawa ngamazwi nje, kwaye akunakwenzeka ukuba enze ngokukhawuleza. Kodwa ke, xa umntu ethanda ngokwenene, uyaxolela. Ngoko ungacinezeli kumntu kwaye ungalili. Yenza nje ukuze uqondisise - uyavuma ukuzithoba kwaye uzisola kakhulu. Kungekudala okanye kamva uya kukuxolela. Kwaye ke, zama ukuphinde wenze njalo kwaye ungathethi kakhulu, kuba ilizwi lingakwazi ukubulala iimvakalelo ngokukhawuleza kwaye zilula kunaluphi na isikhali.