Abantu, nantoni na into abangayithethayo, izidalwa zentlalo. Kwaye oku kuthetha ukuba umntu ufuna intsapho. Intsapho ingaba yincinci okanye inkulu, ingaba ngabazali okanye abantwana, okanye esinye isiqingatha. Unyulu, xa kungekho mntu uthi - "Ndiyakuthanda", ukuze baqonde kwaye bamkele - oku kuyintlekele yangempela kumntu. Kodwa elowo "olungelona siqhelo" lunezizathu zalo.
Ngaphandle kwabazali kunye nabantwana, umntu unokuhlala enesizungu xa engenalo mthandayo. Okanye ube yedwa xa unomlingani wokuphila. Kule ngongoma, ngubani onethamsanqa ... Ngaba umntu, indoda okanye ibhinqa, unokulawula ngaphandle koqabane lobomi? Umntu umele ixesha elingakanani? Kwaye kutheni abanye abantu bayayikhetha?
Izizathu ezilungileyo okanye izizathu
Zonke iingxaki zethu zihlala ekhanda lam, ngoko ke oogqirha kwizinto eziyimpunga - iingqondo zeengqondo kunye neengqondo zengqalelo. Ukuba umntu akafuni ukudibanisa ubomi bakhe nobomi bomntu, kuthetha ukuba unezizathu ezifanelekileyo zezi zinto. Isizathu esinjalo sinokuba sisifo esibuhlungu. Umntu ukwesaba ukuba aphinde abe nakho oko sele sele kwenzekile ebomini bakhe. Ngangaphi na uthando lokuqala, olungenangqiqo nolungaphelele, luphela ngokungcatsha, lugxininisa ingqondo yabantu, lushiya umkhondo obunzulu bobomi bonke ... Kwaye ke umntu ukhetha ukunyaniseka - xa kungekho mntu uthi ndakuthanda xa kungekho mntu wabelane nabo uvuyo lobomi, kodwa akuyi kubakho ukuphoxeka !!
Ukulimala ngokomoya
Abantu bathi omnye umfazi uyamthanda, okwesibini uvumela ukuba athande. Lowo uvumelayo, ngokuqhelekileyo unenkohlakalo kakhulu kulabo abathandayo, ngokuqhelekileyo bayisebenzisa ngenxa yeenjongo zobugovu. Ukuba umntu uxinzeleleke ngokwemvakalelo ebusheni okanye ebusheni, akunakwenzeka ukuba ayilahle ngokuzimela. Kwaye ke umntu akafuni ukuthanda nhlobo. Ukuxiliswa akukhona kuphela xa kungekho mntu uthi "Ndiyakuthanda", kodwa xa kungekho mfuno onjalo. Kwaye oko kungenakuphikiswa njengento nantoni na - ubuncinane "Andifuni ukubopha abanye ngezithembiso," "akunakwenzeka ukuba uyithande ngonaphakade, ngoko kutheni uhluthe abanye" kunye nabanye.
Isizathu siba ngabazali okanye abanye abantu abadala abaye baxhalabisa intombazana, ngokumalunga neemvakalelo zakhe ngomntu. Ingqondo engapheliyo ayikwazi ukujamelana nokukhathazeka ngokomzwelo, ngoko ke eli lizwe lilungiswe ixesha elide yaye, ngokuqinisekileyo, lichaphazela iziganeko zobomi ezilandelayo.
Ngaphandle kokuqonda, umntu uzama ukungena kwiimeko ezinjengeye apho wayefumene intlungu , kwaye ngenxa yoko, uyeka ukukhula kule ndawo. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, kunokwenzeka ukusebenzisa indlela yokusebenza kwengqondo engakhokelela ukuba akhuphe kweli lizwe. Kwaye ke umsebenzi awuqali ngokukwazi ukujamelana nesizungu, xa kungekho mntu uthi "Ndiyakuthanda", kodwa xa kukho umnqweno wokuthetha, zive. Emva koko le nto iyakuguquka, nokuba yintlungu ebomvu.
Kufuneka kukhunjulwe ukuba umntu kufuneka azibonele imfuneko yokulahla le mthwalo, kuba nayiphi na inqubo ithatha ukuba i-trauma iya kufuneka ibe namava kwakhona, ekugqibeleni uyishiye. Ukuba i-psyche ayilungele ukuxinezeleka okunjalo, kwaye oku kwenzekayo xa umqalisi wexhoba izalwane zexhoba, umphumo uya kuba mbi. Unesizungu esinjalo, xa kungekho mntu uthi "Ndiyakuthanda" kwaye kuqondwa, ukuva, ukufunwa, kuya kuba kubi kakhulu. Emva koko, akunakwenzeka ukunyanzelisa umntu ukuba axhumane, njengoko akunakwenzeka ukunyanzelisa ukuthanda ...
Unokukunceda njani?
Uncedo luyimfuneko kuphela kwimeko apho umntu ngokwakhe ngokwakhe emcela ukuba ancede. Umntu oye wahlushwa emoyeni ebusheni bakhe akaqhagamshelani nabanye abantu, kodwa, ngokuphindaphindiweyo, uphumelele kwimpumelelo yakhe emsebenzini, eququzelelwe yinkxalabo enkulu kuyo, kunye namandla angabonakaliyo. Abantu abanjalo abasadingeki ukuba banxibelelane nehlabathi langaphandle, baxhalabele ngakumbi ngehlabathi labo eliphakathi.
Isizathu sesibini somnqweno wokuzimela sisona sizodwa seso sixhobo se-psyche. Ezi zizaziso. Kule meko, ingcali ayifuni. IziNgqungquthela zinehlabathi elityebi kakhulu. Khawucinge ukuba ngaba bantu baziva njani kuluntu! Ama-Introverts ayidingi ukunxibelelana, ngaloo ndlela iiyure zemihla ngemihla kwaye zihlala kwiqela elifutshane kangangokuthi zidinini kangangokuthi zikhetha imisebenzi engabandakanyeki kunye nabafowunelwa abasondeleyo nabanye abantu. Umntu onjalo unomdla kuphela kuye, ihlabathi lakhe langaphakathi, ubudlelwane bakhe obuhle bekhaya abuyi kuhambelana naye. Kodwa i-introverts ayinalo inzondelelo yokusebenza, njengabantu abathintekayo, kunzima kakhulu ukuba bajonge kuluntu. Kuba aba bantu bafanelekile ubugcisa bokuzikhethela benkululeko kunye neshedyuli yomsebenzi wamahhala. Into ephambili kukuba akukho bantu abanomdla wokumthabatha umntu onjalo, ngoko-ke ingozi ephazamisayo ingenakugwema.
Isizathu sesithathu sokuba umnqweno wokuhlala wedwa kukungabikho ukuxilisa ubomi bomntu, ukulungelelanisa nomlingane kunye nobudlelwane, ukungathandi ukufumana uxanduva lwezemali kwintsapho. Olu luhlobo oluqhelekileyo olupheleleyo kunye ne-pragmatism. Injongo yabo ubomi obungenazo iingxaki. Abantu abanjalo, njengommiselo, banqanda oonxibelelwano abanemvakalelo, yonke into ibalwa, kubini kunye nakubomi bomntu. Isizathu salesi sikhundla sihlala kumava obomi, ngokutsho kokubomi bentsapho nabahlobo. Loo mntu akayi kulungiswa. Ngoko ke, ukuba umntu onjalo ubalulekile kuwe, yamkela isikhundla sakhe sokuphila, mhlawumbi ngexesha uya kukuvumela ukuba usondele kuye.
Ingaba siyayithanda okanye ayithandi, ubuntu bufuna ukuba yedwa, buhlungu njengoko kubonakala ngathi ...