Uthando luni na?
Kunzima ukuqonda ukuba yintoni uthando. Omnye ubiza isifo, umntu usabela ngeekhemikhali. Kodwa bona kunye nabanye abayi kukhankanya ukuba uthando lubangela umnqweno oqinileyo wokuba sisondele kumntu oye waba ngu-half half-cherished. Yintoni na? Ukuze unikezele inxalenye yakho okanye ubuyisele inxalenye yesibini elahlekileyo? Iingcali zengqondo zithi le mnqweno yokuba yindlela evuyayo yokuba nomnye umntu ayikho into engaphezulu kokubongwa komntu ongaphantsi, ubukho beengxaki ezahlukeneyo ezinokuthi kwaye kufuneka zixazululwe.
Uthando olungenakwenzeka.
Kukho uluvo lokuba umnqweno wokufumana uthando lwakho olungenakufumana, ukunikezela ngeendawo ezingekhoyo zivela kubungqina bokuba akukho amava okwaneleyo obomi bomphefumlo. Khumbula amaxesha anzima, xa ingqondo nomphefumlo zixakekile ngesisombululo semisebenzi ebalulekileyo, uthando luya kwimvelaphi, aluba luyimfuneko. Ngoko ke, elinye lamanyathelo okuqala endleleni yokulwa nentloni ngenxa yothando olungenakwenzeka yimfundo yothando. Kufuneka uzenzele uthando lwakho, ukuvumela ilungelo lokuphila olonwabileyo nokwanelisekile, ukuvumela ukuba ukhululeke nantoni na, kuquka ukuxhomekeka kwothando olungenakwenzeka.
Ukubandezeleka ngovuyo?
Amabali amaninzi ebomi afundise abantu abaninzi ukuba ulonwabo lunokwenzeka kuphela xa kukho umntu othandekayo osondeleyo. Kwaye ukuba kukho imeko xa oku kungenakwenzeka, baqala ukubandezeleka baze baziqinisekise ngokwabo, ukungonwabi. Iingcali zengqondo zihlala ziqaphela imeko xa umntu evuya ngokubandezeleka kwakhe, ekutshintsheni uthando olungenakwenzeka kunye nesihawu ngabantu abakujikelezile. Ngoko bafumana ingqalelo ababeyifunayo kumntu othandekayo. Enyanisweni, kubalulekile ukuqonda nokuqonda oko kuqhuba iimvakalelo zomntu ohluphekileyo. Uthando lokwenene okanye umnqweno wokutsala ingqalelo, uzalise ukungabi nalutho komphefumlo kunye nantoni na, kuquka ukuxhatshazwa, okwakhiwa kwihlelo?
Ayikho imfihlo yokuba abadala, nangona ubudala babo, baqhubeke bedlala imidlalo. Nangona uninzi lwale midlalo alukho umntwana. Ngako konke ukungafuni, bona, kuba ngabantu abadala, bawela phantsi koxhomekeke kwimizekelo yokuziphatha yabazali, ngokuxelisa abangenakuqonda kwaye bekhulile. Ukuba umntwana wakhuliswa, ukhangela ukubandezeleka kunye namava onothando olungenakuvuyisa, ngoko ke, ekubeni engumntu omdala, akayi kukwazi ukuqonda ngokwenene, kwaye uya kwenza ummo okhunjulwayo wokufumana uthando olungenakwenzeka xa unjalo ithuba. Mhlawumbi, kwakungenalo uthando lwangempela, kwaye kuya kwenzeka ukuba ngamava. Kule meko, ukungabikho kobudlelwane kuthatyathwa ngumfanekiso onguyintandokazi. Ukungabikho ngokupheleleyo kweentsilelo zomlingani, uthando olungenakwenzeka, lujika lube yintaba engenakufikeleleka, apho ulonwabo luya kugxininisa nentloko kwaye lube luncedo olungenamkhethe. Nangona kunjalo, phantse rhoqo ebomini bokwenene, ubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu ababini abanothando bunobunzima. Kungenzeka ukuba, ngokudibanisa kweemeko, uthando lwakho lwangempela aluyi kuhlala ixesha elide njengengqondo engenakufikeleleka. Oku kubonisa ukuba umntu uvakalelwa ngento engazange ibe nayo kwaye ayikwazi ukuba yintoni, oko kukuthi, yena ngokwakhe ucinga isizathu sokuba namava kunye neentlungu zakhe, kwaye yena ngokwakhe (kunye novuyo) unikezela ngoluvo olubi.
Kuye kwenzeka ukuba onke amava ngothando olungenakwenzeka - oku akuthandiyo. Andiyithandi, ngenxa yento enqwenela ngayo, ubomi. Uvakalelo lokwenene luthando lukwazi ukunika, kungekhona imfuneko yokuthatha. Ukuba ulwazi olusiluthandayo alukwanele ukuba ulahlekise le mvakalelo, ngoko kukufanelekile ukujika kwezinye iindlela ezininzi.
Iingcebiso zeengqondo.
- Khangela ibali lakho kwicala. Ukwenza oku, qhelana namabali afana nabanye abantu uze uzame ukuqonda indlela omnye umntu akwazi ngayo ukunqoba ukuvakalelwa. Unokuhlalutya isithuba sobuntu abadumileyo, abadlali, abaculi.
- Yenza ukuzibamba. Kule nto, ekuseni nakusihlwa, imihla ngemihla kufuneka iphinde iphindwe isethi semfutshane emfutshane, equka ixesha elihle: "Ndivuya. Ndikhululekile. Ndivulekile ebomini. " Zama ukuthetha nje ibinzana, kodwa ukuliva. Ngaba uzive uvumelekile, ufumane ixesha elifutshane, kodwa usenalo ulonwabo, inkululeko, isingoma yobomi.
- Ukuzibandakanya ekuphumuleni. Kuya kunceda ukukhulula umthwalo wamava, phumula. Ukwenza oku, unokucinga ukuba ngaphakathi kwakho ukukhanya okufudumele, okulula. Ukugxininisa, kubalulekile ukufezekisa ukukhuliswa kwe-luminescence. Kule ngongoma, ungabamba nje urhulumente ongeke ufune uthando, kwaye unike.
- Ukufunda ukunika uthando lwakho kungagqithwanga, kungekhona into enqwenelekayo, kodwa nje kwabanye abantu, abantwana, izalamane, bathandekayo. Nika uthando, uyikhulule ehlabathini, kwaye iya kubuya kuwe yomeleza amaxesha amaninzi. Umntu onothando unamandla amakhulu, oku kuvakalelwa.
Ukuba ufumana kunzima ukujamelana namava akho ngokwakho, qhagamshelana nengcali yeengqondo. Ubomi buninzi, buhle kwaye buyamangalisa. Iyaqhubeka. Kuya kuba yiphutha elikhulu ukuzithintela zonke iintsilelo zobomi kuphela ngenxa yokuvakalelwa ngothando olungenakwenzeka. Emva kwakho konke, kuba umntu uhlala evakalelwa ngothando, kubalulekile kuphela ukuzivula kuye, vumela intlungu kwaye uvumele ukuba ujabule kwaye ujabulele ubomi. Ngoku uyazi ukuba uluthando lokwenene luyintoni, kwaye iingcebiso zeengqondo ze-psychologists zifanele zikuncede ukuba iimvakalelo zakho azifumani ukulungelelana.
Ekugqibeleni kukufanele ukukhumbule ukuba uthando lukhanya, oku luyolo lonwabo. Ayikwazi ukuba "engenakwenzeka", kuba akukho namnye okwazi ukukunqanda ukuba uthande kwaye unike uthando. Enyanisweni, uthando oluqaqambileyo lubangela umntu nangona into enalo luthando ihlala ingenakufikeleleka ngonaphakade.