Indlela yokuzikhusela wena kunye nosapho ekuhlaselweni komkhwekazi

Abasetyhini abaninzi bacinga ukuba abanenhlanhla kunye noninazala. Akumangalisi ukuba amahlaya amaninzi kunye nama-anecdotes kwesi sihloko. Xa utshata, kunye nomthandekayo, uya kufakwa kunye nonina. Ukwakha ubuhlobo obuhle naye akusoloko kulula. Kodwa kwiimeko ezininzi, kubalulekile ukuzama. Ngoko, umxholo wendaba yethu yanamhlanje "Indlela yokuzikhusela wena kunye nosapho ekuhlaselweni koomamazala".



Okokuqala, uninazala unomntu, ngoko ke, unamathuba kunye nokungahambi kakuhle, kwaye oku kufuneka kuthathelwe ingqalelo xa kusekwa uqhagamshelwano. Akukho mntu uphelele. Ngoko ngamanye amaxesha kufuneka udibanise. Ukongeza, naye ungumfazi, kwaye oku, mhlawumbi, ngamanye amaxesha kuya kunceda ukujonga imeko kule ndawo. Ngokuqinisekileyo, banenhlanhla abathile banethamsanqa kunye noninazala, banokuqonda ngokuvisisanayo, bavumelana ngokuvumelana nesimo sengqondo, umlingiswa kunye nombono wobomi. Uninazala uba ngumhlobo, umlingane, umhlobo omdala kunye kunye namaxesha omama wesibini. Kodwa siya kuqhubeka ukusuka kwimbono yokuba kukho iintsapho ezincinci kunomyinge, umyinge, apho umama-mkhwekazi nomalokazana bephethe iintambo zabo ezintloko. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, izinga lokuqonda phakathi kwezihlobo ezisandul 'ukuzalwa kunokuhluka kakhulu kwiimeko eziqhelekileyo ezifudumeleyo neentlonelo kubantu abayinto enyanyekayo, xa abantu benganyamezelani umoya womnye. Yonke into incike kwiimeko nakubantu abangene kuyo, ngoko awukwazi ukunika iingcebiso ezithile malunga nendlela yokwenza ngayo nendlela yokusombulula ingxaki. Kodwa unako ukunika ezinye iingcomo, apho ungakha khona, kuxhomekeka kwiimpawu eziba nazo. Okokuqala, kufuneka kuthathelwe ukuba ukwahlukana kunye nokuhlukana nokuhlala nomama wendoda kungumnyehluko omkhulu omkhulu. Ngokuqhelekileyo kuxhomekeke kulo, ukuba ubuhlobo bakho obusondeleyo kunye noninazala buyakhiwa njani. Ngokuqinisekileyo, ngamanye amaxesha akukho ukuhlala ngokwahlukileyo okanye umgama okwenza ulwalamano olufudumeleyo, kwaye umkhwekazi nomkhwezana abanakufumana ulwimi olufanayo nangona babonwa kanye ngenyanga. Kodwa ngokuqhelekileyo ukwakha ubudlelwane obuhambelanayo nala mabhinqa amabini kunzima kakhulu xa behlala phantsi kophahla olufanayo, ingakumbi ukuba lolu phapha lusemkhwezala, njengoko kungenakwenzeka. Ewe, into ekhethekileyo kukuba uhlala ngokwahlukileyo kubazali. Kodwa nakwimeko enjalo akukho siqinisekiso sokuba akukho mntu uza kuphazamisa ebomini bakho, ungakhankanyi imeko xa intombi ingena kwikhaya elitsha apho uninazala ehlala khona iminyaka emininzi, unemibono yakhe, imigaqo, kunye nempilo esele isisungulwe. Kodwa umalokazana ngumdala, kunye nomntu wakhe, kunye nemibono yakhe nemikhwa. Kwaye, naye, wafika waya kuhlala nomyeni wakhe, ngoko ke, ufuna ukuziva ekhaya, ukubona ukuba uyilungu elifanayo lentsapho, kunye nayo yonke into eqwalaselwa nayo. Apha uqala ukuqhubana kokuqala. Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba nangona wena kunye nonyoko wakho ungakhethi ngokukhethekileyo, kufuneka uzame ukufunda indlela yokuhambelana, kuba ukuxabana okuqhubekayo kwifom "umkhwekazi-mkhwenkwe-mkhwenkwe", ngokukodwa kwindawo ephilileyo, banako ukutshabalalisa umtshato onamandla. Zama ukwazi umamazala wakho ngokusemandleni akho, umlingani wakhe, iminqweno, iimfuno, ukujonga ubomi. Ngoko kuya kuba lula ukuba uyayiqonda, ukuqonda ukuba yimiphi imingcele ofuna ukuyidala ukuze wakhe ubudlelwane nayo ngokuchanekileyo. Uya kuqonda oko akuthandayo, kwaye kungcono ukuphepha xa usebenzisana naye. Mamela amabali endoda malunga nosapho lwakhe kunye nabazali. Ngoko unokufunda malunga nezithethe zentsapho kunye namasiko, malunga nemikhwa yasemakhaya, malunga nobudlelwane phakathi kwabazali, kuba ngokuqhelekileyo imodeli yobudlelwane babazali ichaphazela ukubunjwa kwembono yabantwana malunga nolwalamano lwentsapho kwikamva. Omnye umama-mkhwenkwe uyaqonda ukuba unyana wakhe naye ungumntu, ngoko ke akufanelekanga. Kwaye unako ukuluhlula zonke iimpazamo zayo. Kodwa enye into xa yena ngokwakhe eqonda oku, kwaye ngokufanayo, xa unesilumko sokuqala uqala ukuthetha ngezinto ezingathandekiyo ngaye. Okanye ukhononda ngalo, ngokukodwa nabangaphandle. Wena, mhlawumbi, ngeyure kwaye upholile, kunye nomyeni wakhe udibanise, kodwa ilizwi, njengoko lithethayo, kungekhona intlunkulu ... kwaye umama-mkhwenkwe la mazwi amnandi malunga nendodana ekhunjulwayo aya kulahlwa ngokukhawuleza kunokuba umyeni wakho. Uninazala kufuneka azi ukuba uyamthanda unyana wakhe ngokuthembeka. Yaye ukuba uyamgxeka, uya kuthatha njengento yokuhlambalaza. Yiba nomkhwekazi onobuqili kwaye obunqamlekileyo, umphathe ngokuhlonela, unomdla kuye ngokunyanisekileyo. Musa ukuthoba, vele uzuze. Ukuba ubuqhetseba bukulungele ukuphuma emlonyeni wakho, zama ukuphazamisa. Uninazala uya kunzima ukuwamkela kakubi ukuba unobungane kuye. Hlala naye ngesithunzi nangentembelo. Ukuba umama-mkhwenkwe akayithandi kakhulu kuwe, zama ukufumanisa ezinye iimpawu ezifanelekile. Ukuba umama-mkhwenkwe usoloko enika iingcebiso ezingadingekile, zithathele ingqalelo ngokucokisekileyo kunye nobungane, kwaye ukhulule ngendlela yakho. Iingxaki zokuhlala kunye nazo zingavela ekubeni wena nomama-mkhwe wakho bahlula isikhala sakho somntu , sisebenzisane nemikhwa yomnye nomnye. Umzekelo, omnye wenu unokukhokela indlela yokuphila echasene nendlela yokuphila komnye. Ukuba akukho ndlela yokunyaniseka, okanye akukho mntu ufuna, ukuhlala kunye mhlawumbi kuyiphutha, kuba okuqhubekayo - kubi kakhulu. Ukuba uqale ukuhlala kunye, kufuneka uxoxe ngokubhekiselele kubomi kunye neemfanelo zasekhaya, ukwenzela ukuba kamva kungabikho ukungaqondani kunye nezikhalazo. Kwimiba yokukhulisa abantwana, bazise ukuba uyabahlonela kwaye uyayixabisa imbono yakhe, kodwa isigqibo sokugqibela siya kwenziwa nguwe, abazali. Iimbono zakho kulo mbandela ziza kuba zihluke ngenxa yobudala beminyaka. Kodwa ke vumela uninazala wakho athathe inxaxheba, kuba unogogo. Zama ukufundela kumama-mkhwenkwe into enomdla, ukuba ufunde kumava akhe. Kwaye kukuhle kuwe, kwaye kumnandi kuye. Ukususela ekuqaleni, cacisa indawo yakho yomntu, apho wena nomyeni wakho abayikukhathazeka. Uwenza umyalelo kwigumbi lakho. Yenza kucace ukuba awuyithandi xa ungena egumbini ngaphandle kokonkqoza. Ukuba unxibelelwano nomama-mkhwenkwe wakho unikelwe nzima, zama ukunciphisa olu nxibelelo oluya kuncinci kwaye luya kubangela imibuzo engadingekile. Kunzima xa umamazala egxeka umalokazana, umisa umyeni wakhe nomfazi wakhe, ngamanye amaxesha abantwana kunye nonina, baphazamisa ebomini babatshati kunye nokukhuliswa kwabantwana, ngamanye amaxesha bacinga ukuba umalokazana akafanelekanga unyana wakhe. Kodwa umalokazana, naye, akayiyo iswekile. Ukuba uziva ukuba iingxabano zingenakugwema, kungcono ukuphuma kwaye ulondoloze ubudlelwane, kunye neentsholongwane. Kwaye kuya kubonakala lula ukunxibelelana. Ukuba ungeyithandi umamazala wakho, ungazithuthuli, ulwalamano olungileyo kunye oluhloniphekileyo, mhlawumbi likude. Siyathemba ukuba inqaku lethu "Indlela yokuzikhusela wena kunye nosapho ekuhlaselweni komkhwekazi" kuya kukunceda ukuba ubuhlobo kunye nomama wakho wesibili.