Mhlawumbi umntu kwaye uya kuba sisityhilelo sokuba akukho kuphela abafazi abajongene nobulili babo. Bobabini abalingani bezesondo banenkxalabo malunga nendlela yokwenza ukuba isiqingatha sakhe saneliseke kwaye saneliswe emva kokuthandana kokuthandana. Yaye ukuba kunzima ukuphawula amava kumntu, akuthethi ukuba azinjalo. Ngoko, yintoni na amadoda ayesaba kakhulu embhedeni?
Uloyiko, olunokuthi luboniswe ngelinye ibinzana: "Kuthekani ukuba ayisebenzi?"
Xa yonke into yowokuqala xa bobabini bexesha elihle, umbuzo ofanayo, ngokufutshane, uhanjelwa ngamadoda amaninzi. Nangona kunjalo, loloyiko luba nzima ukuba imeko eyenzile. Ngubani u-zzahochetsya ovakalelwa njengelutsha olungenamava okanye abe yinto yokuhlekwa yinkwenkwe yowesifazane, ingakumbi ukuba lo mfazi uyakuthanda. Uloyiko olufanayo lunokuba isizathu sokuba ubudlelwane obuphuculayo buya kuhamba ukuya kwisinyathelo esilandelayo.
Ukususela kwimeko enjalo, akukho mntu ukhuselweyo, kwaye ukuba zonke ezi ngasentla zikhumbuza ubuhlobo bakho, kufuneka uzilungiselele, kwaye uphuhlise isicwangciso somlingane wakho ongenalutho. Okokuqala, akufanelekanga "ukugxotha emagxeni", ukuqhawula bonke ubudlelwane kunye nokubalekela kwintloni. Kodwa "thabatha inkunzi yenkomo ngeempondo" kule meko ayifanelekanga, uxinzelelo olunzulu luyakwenza buhlungu. Kungcono ukucinga malunga nento eyenza ukuba ingabonakali, mhlawumbi ukwesaba okulula, kubonakaliswe ngenye indlela yokwahlukana kumlingane wakho. Indlela efanelekileyo kakhulu yokuphuma kule meko ingaba yithuba kunye nokuxhalaba. Vumela umntu wakho abe nomuzwa wokuthi umfazi obuthakathaka nobuthakathaka uhamba naye, oza kuyilibala naye konke ukoyika kwakhe.
Uloyiko lokuba uya kufaniswa namanye amadoda
Amadoda amaninzi ayesaba ngokwabo ukuba umfazi uya kuwuqhathanisa namadoda angaphambili. Uloyiko lunokubangela enye yokwenza uloyiko lokungahambi kakuhle. Olu hlobo lwenkoyiko lunokuthi luvelele kwisithandwa sakho samanje, kwaye luyakhula ngenxa yegama ongazange linikezwe ngumthandi wakho wangaphambili. Wena, skoreevsego, kwaye awuzange ucinge ukuba ukuqala kwakho kwakuyi-nihilism epheleleyo, kodwa ebhedini wayesazi ukuba yintoni yokwenza, kunokungaqondwa kakubi.
Ngoko ke, sele sele kuthethwa igama, kwaye lulubuhlungu kangakanani lunefuthe layo elibi. Yintoni endiyenzayo? Zizilungiselele ngenxa yokuba kuya kuba nzima ukubuyisela uxolo lomgcini-mkhosi wakho kunokuba uphule. Yonke into eyenziwa yi-vamostaetsya, ikhuthele kwaye ayikho into enqwenelekayo kuphela ngamazwi, kodwa kunye nezenzo zokubonisa ukuba umntu uyona mhle.
Uloyiko lokugqiba kwangaphambili
Izixhobo zomzimba wesilisa zineenkcukacha ezininzi, kwaye akuqhelekanga. Mhlawumbi, ngokokuba umntu uyazi ukuba loo mifanekiso iyakwenzeka, kwaye, ngokuqinisekileyo, ifihla yonke into kuyo yonke indlela. Kwaye kwenzeka ngaloo ndlela, oko akusiyo isiqhelo-siqhelo, kodwa, njengoko besithi, konke kwenzeka.
Ngoko ukuba ujamelene naloo nto, ungakhethi ngokukhawuleza naziphi na izigqibo, mhlawumbi umfana wakho wayekhathazekile nje, okanye inkosikazi yakhe yangaphambili yayingabalulekanga, eyashiya into ethile. Amadoda nabo bantu, kwaye akukho mntu uhlala kubo.
Ukuba umntu othandekayo uya kuchitha ixesha elide, ukuze kamva ubomi bakho bobulili bube buhle kubo bobabini. Zama ukwandisa ixesha lokuqala ngaphambi kwesondo, ngokuthe ngcembe umntu wakho ukhululekile ngokwengqondo, kwaye uvuyo lwakho luya kuba lude kwaye luyavumelana, kuba uya kuzicingela wena kuphela, kungekhona malunga nokuba ungayifuni.
Uloyiko lomlingani wakho wesini
Kwenzeka ukuba amadoda ayesaba nje iindlovu zabo, yinto apho umfazi ekhuselekileyo ebhedini okanye ephikisanayo. Uhlobo lokuqala lwabasetyhini luyalela abantu amadoda ngaphambili, ngexesha nangemva kokulala ngokwesini, yintoni kwaye kufuneka yenze njani. Ukuba kanye xa kungenako ukubonisa ubungqina bendoda, ngoko kwixesha elizayo uqala ukukhathazeka ngokuba ngumpopi, owenza iilayiphu ngaphandle kokufumana ukutya kule nkqubo.
Abafazi abangapheliyo, abaxhatshazwa kukuba ababandakanyekanga kwinkqubo yesondo. Mhlawumbi oku kubangelwa ziinkathazo kunye nokuthozama okukhulu, kodwa ngubani ongathanda ukutyalomali kwinkqubo yomoya nomoya ngaphandle kokufumana nayiphi na impendulo.
Yintoni enokuyicebisa ngayo umfazi kule meko? Khawucinge nje kwindawo yendoda yakho uze ucinge ukuba ungubani, kwaye ungathini na endaweni yakhe. Kwimeko yokuqala, zama ukucinga nje ngawe, kodwa kwimeko yesibini, phumula kwaye ujabulele inkqubo. Ngezesondo, akukho ndawo yokwenza uloyiko nokuzingca, nantsi yonke into ifanele ibe yintsebenziswano, kodwa ngaphandle koko.