Ungaziqonda njani loo maphupha? Ukuba umntu wangaphambili akafiki kuwe rhoqo, awukwazi ukunika imibono enjalo ibaluleke kakhulu. Uninzi mhlawumbi, awukaze usebenzise umgaqo wokwahlukana kwaye ufuna ukubuyisela ilahlekileyo. Kodwa kutheni le ndoda yangaphambili iphupha iphupha, kubalulekile ukujonga kwiincwadi zokuphupha zeengcali zeengqondo kunye nababonisi.
Ngamaphi amaphupha athetha ntoni ngomntu owayengumthandi, funda apha
Iingubo Ukuchazwa kweFreud
Izazinzulu zidibanisa ngqo amaphupha kunye neziganeko zangempela zobomi kwaye zichaze kuphela kwiinjongo zengqondo. Ngoko ke, ukuba uphupha ngomntu owayengumntu wokuqala, oku kunokuthetha ukuxabana nomtsha omtsha. Inokwenzeka ukuba, udla ngokuthelekisa okhethiweyo wakho kunye neyokugqibela kwaye awuyi kukwazi ukumelana neengcinga zakho ngokuvakalayo. Oku kunokubangela ingxabano, kuba akukho mntu uya kunyamezela nangona kuthelekiswa okulungileyo kunye noyandulela.
Incwadi yalephupha nayo ichaza loo mbono njengengqondo efihliweyo yecala, ngakumbi ukuba ukuphuka kobudlelwane kuye kwenzeka ngephutha lakho. Yiba nexesha lokuba ekugqibeleni uhlambele kumfanekiso wendoda uze uqhubeke.
Isizathu sephupha kunye nomntu owayengumntu nako nako ukuhoxiswa kobukhali beemvakalelo kwiimeko zesimo samanje, nangona intombazana ngokwayo isaba ukuyivuma.
Kutheni uphupha ukutshata nomntu ongathandwa, funda apha
Ukucaciswa okwandisiweyo
Siqokelele zonke iinguqulelo ezivela kwiincwadi ezahlukeneyo zokuphupha apho kubonakala kwangaphambili ukuba ngumntu oyintloko. Ukuze kube lula ukwenza umsebenzi, sinika uluhlu lwezinto ezikhethiweyo malunga nendoda engaphambili okanye amaphupha abathandayo.
- Amatyala angaphendulwanga. Unyulo oludlulileyo kuthi kuthi ngamaphupha, njengesimboli sexesha elidlulileyo. Iincwadi ezininzi eziphuphayo azixhunyeli ukubonakala kwakhe ngqo kunye nobomi bakhe. Ukutolika, kunoko ngokubanzi: uthathele kakhulu kuwe kwaye kufuneka uhambe emva komthwalo wexesha elidlulileyo ukuhamba ngokugqithiseleyo ebomini.
- Umntu owayengumntu osekuphupheni unokuba yi-harbinger yeyiphi imicimbi okanye abantu abadlulileyo abaya kwenza ukuba bazive. Musa ukuwujonga nje kuphela ngombono ongalunganga. Mhlawumbi, uya kumenywa kukuhlwa kweentlanganiso zabafundi, okanye uya kudibana nomhlobo ongenakubonwa iminyaka emininzi.
- Ubundlobongela kunye nabangaphambili, kwaye ngaphandle kokuzonwabisa, kuthetha ukuba awuyikuthintela iimvakalelo kwaye oku kubangalisa ubudlelwane nabanye. Kwixesha elizayo, iingxaki ezincinane zivela kulo mhlaba.
- Ngaba umthandayo wayemanga ephupheni? Kungekudala, ulindele into yokuthandana. Ekuqaleni, kuya kubonakala ngathi yinto elula yokudlala ngothando, kodwa inokukhula ibe ngumtshato omtsha nozinzile.
- Umntu onxilisayo wesibini uthetha ukuba unomdla kakhulu ngesini esahlukileyo. Qaphela ukuba ungonakalisi idumela lakho. Eli phupha - uhlobo lwesilumkiso abanye abanokukuqonda kakubi ukuziphatha kwakho nokuhleka emva kwakho.
- Nangona ukwahlula iindlela ngokuvuma ngokubambisana, kwaye kuthatha ixesha elide emva koko, ngokwenene unokungonwabi ukubona indoda yakho yangaphambili kunye nomnye umfazi. Kwaye ephupheni, ngakumbi. Kodwa, le yiindaba zokuqala zeziganeko ezivuya. Lindela kwikamva elisondeleyo ngothando olutsha okanye umtshato. Kungenzeka ukuba ubudlelwane obulahlekileyo bexesha elidlulileyo buya kubuyiselwa. Kukhona enye ingcaciso - awukwazi ukulibala, iqabane lihlala likhumbula kwaye lizisola ngelahleko.
Kwimeko nayiphi na into, ininzi ithambekele kwinto yokuba umntu akafanele aqonde kakubi amaphupha kunye nabangaphambili. Ezi zibonakaliso ukuba ubomi obutsha sele sele bedibanisa emnyango wakho, kufuneka nje uvule kwaye uvumele ulwalamano olutsha kunye neemvakalelo. Kodwa ungalibali malunga neemeko zakho zengqondo, ingakumbi ukuba awufuni ukuyeka ulwalamano. Thatha wena ngesandla uze uqalise ubomi ukususela ekuqaleni.