Yintoni indoda okanye inkwenkwe yangaphambili ephuphayo?

Kutheni sifuna iphupha lathandekayo? Ukutolika ukuphupha kwephupha, apho indoda yangaphambili okanye inkwenkwe yayicinga.
Kwenzeka ukuba ulwalamano oluqinileyo luye lwaphela, kodwa lowo owayesithandayo okanye umyeni uyaqhubeka ekuhlukumeza ngamaphupha. Oku kuqondakalayo, kuba lo mntu umele isigaba esithile sobubomi bakho kwaye uyisuse ngokupheleleyo kwimimori ayiyi kusebenza.

Ungaziqonda njani loo maphupha? Ukuba umntu wangaphambili akafiki kuwe rhoqo, awukwazi ukunika imibono enjalo ibaluleke kakhulu. Uninzi mhlawumbi, awukaze usebenzise umgaqo wokwahlukana kwaye ufuna ukubuyisela ilahlekileyo. Kodwa kutheni le ndoda yangaphambili iphupha iphupha, kubalulekile ukujonga kwiincwadi zokuphupha zeengcali zeengqondo kunye nababonisi.

Ngamaphi amaphupha athetha ntoni ngomntu owayengumthandi, funda apha

Iingubo Ukuchazwa kweFreud

Izazinzulu zidibanisa ngqo amaphupha kunye neziganeko zangempela zobomi kwaye zichaze kuphela kwiinjongo zengqondo. Ngoko ke, ukuba uphupha ngomntu owayengumntu wokuqala, oku kunokuthetha ukuxabana nomtsha omtsha. Inokwenzeka ukuba, udla ngokuthelekisa okhethiweyo wakho kunye neyokugqibela kwaye awuyi kukwazi ukumelana neengcinga zakho ngokuvakalayo. Oku kunokubangela ingxabano, kuba akukho mntu uya kunyamezela nangona kuthelekiswa okulungileyo kunye noyandulela.

Incwadi yalephupha nayo ichaza loo mbono njengengqondo efihliweyo yecala, ngakumbi ukuba ukuphuka kobudlelwane kuye kwenzeka ngephutha lakho. Yiba nexesha lokuba ekugqibeleni uhlambele kumfanekiso wendoda uze uqhubeke.

Isizathu sephupha kunye nomntu owayengumntu nako nako ukuhoxiswa kobukhali beemvakalelo kwiimeko zesimo samanje, nangona intombazana ngokwayo isaba ukuyivuma.

Kutheni uphupha ukutshata nomntu ongathandwa, funda apha

Ukucaciswa okwandisiweyo

Siqokelele zonke iinguqulelo ezivela kwiincwadi ezahlukeneyo zokuphupha apho kubonakala kwangaphambili ukuba ngumntu oyintloko. Ukuze kube lula ukwenza umsebenzi, sinika uluhlu lwezinto ezikhethiweyo malunga nendoda engaphambili okanye amaphupha abathandayo.

Kwimeko nayiphi na into, ininzi ithambekele kwinto yokuba umntu akafanele aqonde kakubi amaphupha kunye nabangaphambili. Ezi zibonakaliso ukuba ubomi obutsha sele sele bedibanisa emnyango wakho, kufuneka nje uvule kwaye uvumele ulwalamano olutsha kunye neemvakalelo. Kodwa ungalibali malunga neemeko zakho zengqondo, ingakumbi ukuba awufuni ukuyeka ulwalamano. Thatha wena ngesandla uze uqalise ubomi ukususela ekuqaleni.