Cinga iziphakamiso ezongezelelweyo kubazali, nikele imizekelo yento eningayidingi ukuxelela abantwana, kwaye yintoni efunekayo kwimeko ethile, kwaye nifunde ukuba wenzeni ukuba uthathe umntwana wakho okanye elinye ilungu lentsapho.
Iingcebiso ezongezelelweyo kubazali
Ukunyamekela ibhanki yengcaciso yomntwana wakho. Ngenxa yokuba ngexesha lethu, abantwana ababethunjwa, kananjalo, umntwana angakwazi ukulahleka okanye alahleke. Ngokuqhelekileyo ukufotela abantwana babo, kwaye ngokuphakama okupheleleyo kunye nokuvala. Ukuba kunokwenzeka, yususe kwividiyo. I-Forensics ithi kuya kuba kuhle ukuba neenkibo zeenwele zabantwana, iimpawu zeminwe kunye nokugcinwa kwekhati lomntwana. Kwiimeko ezinxamisekileyo, oku kunokuba luncedo kakhulu.
Musa ukuvumela abantwana ukuba bahambe ngezinto ezixabisekileyo kunye neempahla ezixabisekileyo (iimpahla ezibiza, abadlali be-mp3, ubucwebe begolide).
Kwezinye iiklasi kunye neenkampani zentendelezo, ngokuqhelekileyo kunokwenzeka ukunyusa imali-leyo yimfuno yemali ngeengongelo ezahlukahlukeneyo. Ukuba abaphulaphuli abanjalo abahlwaywanga, oko kuya kubangela iziphumo ezimbi. Ukuba uqaphela ukuba umntwana uyeke ukuphuma esitratweni, ukwesaba ukukwenza, okanye ukweqa iiklasi esikolweni, uthetha nomntwana ngendlela efanelekileyo, kufuneka akuthembele kwaye akuxelele ukuba uziphatha njani, mhlawumbi umntu uyasongela. Ndixelele ukuba ukuba akayikufihla into evela kunina kunye noyise, kuya kuba nako ukulungisa yonke into. Ukongezelela koko, ukuba kukho into yokuba umntwana wakho unento ephuma ngaphandle, ngokukhawuleza uqhagamshelane namapolisa, kufuneka athathe amanyathelo.
Abantwana bafanele bakwazi ukuvala ngokusondeleyo umnyango nangaphakathi, ukusuka ngaphandle, mfundise indlela yokuphatha ngokufanelekileyo imali kunye neentshixo. Yithi akukho kwaye akukho mntu egameni lakho kufuneka eze kwindlu yakho kunye nomntwana ukuba anike isikhwama, into ethile, uhlale ubusuku kunye njalo. Ingane ayifanele ivumele abantu bangene endlwini.
Sinyusa umntwana ngendlela enjalo abantu abadala bahlala bechanekile. Ngako oko, ukukhusela i-crumb kwi-collision kunye nabaphangi, ama-maniacs, ama-delinquents, abadlwenguli kunye nabanye, fundisa abantwana:
- Ukuthintela ukuthetha nabantu abangabaziyo. Ukuba baqala ukunikela into ethile, ngoko umntwana kufuneka athi "Hayi!" Kwaye ushiye ngexesha elifanayo.
- Ungalokothi uvumele ukukholisa abantu abangabaziyo, nokuba babiza umntwana ngegama baze banikele ngeentaba zegolide. Bonke abaphezulu abakulungile. Izihlobo kuphela, abazali kunye nabahlobo abasondeleyo bentsapho kufuneka bakuthobele. Ukuba umntwana ubona ukuba umhambi uyamlandela, makangene ngesibindi ngabadluli bamcele ukuba amncede aze amkhusele. Umsebenzi wakho ukufundisa umntwana ukuba akwenze.
- Musa ukuya naphi na abantu abangaziwayo, akunandaba nokuba yinkwenkwana yamakhwenkwe okanye i-muzhiks yabantu abadala.
- Ungalokothi ugibele kwi-elevator nabantu abangabaziyo.
- Ngaphantsi kokungacingi ukuhlala phantsi komnye umntu.
- Ungalokothi uthathe izipho kunye nezipho ezivela kwiintsapho de uze umama okanye utata anike imvume. Izikolo zesiNgesi neyeMerika zibonelela ngeemeko ezinjalo kwangaphambili, ngoko zidlala ngokukodwa nabantwana kunye nootitshala. I-Taketi ethembekileyo ngakumbi ingakuphepha ukunxibelelana nabaphuli-mthetho. Kanye kwizikolweni zethu akumiswanga, zama ukufundisa le bantwana ngokwabo. Kwizikolo zesiNgesi, abantwana banikezwa imidlalo kunye neemeko ezahlukeneyo zeglasi, ukuba umntwana uyifumana ngokufanelekileyo indlela yokuphuma kwimeko, ngoko uyakhuthazwa aze adunyiswe. Ngokomzekelo, uza kwenza ntoni ukuba u-anti ongaziwayo uthi uya kubonisa i-puppy enhle, ukuba uya naye? Uya kuziphatha njani ukuba umntu uzinikela ukukuqhubela emotweni ebiza kakhulu? Yintoni oya kuyenza xa umntu uthi uyazi umama wakho, ngoku uya emsebenzini wakhe, kwaye ucela ukuba uhambe naye, kwaye unyoko akazange akubizele kwaye waxwayisa ngawo? Iimidlalo ezinjalo ziya kubangela ukuba kubekho umphumo omuhle.
- Musa ukuphuma xa ubumnyama kwaye ungahambi, apho umama akakwazi ukukubona ewindow.
- Umntwana kufuneka agweme amaqashiso angenanto, ukuhlaliswa komhlaba, imifula, iindawo zokungcebeleka, indawo ezishiyiweyo, iindlu zezindlu ezilahliwe.
- Ungaze uhambe nawaphi na uhambo ngaphandle kolwazi lwabazali.
- Kungakhathaliseki ukuba yintoni imeko, ngokukhawuleza zhesoobshchit ngale nto kwiintsapho okanye ngabazali.
Xa ufundisa imithetho yokhuseleko lomntwana wakho, ungamsabisi. Ngoko awukwazi ukuwufunda ukuhamba kwiimeko ezibucayi, ngaphezu koko, nangona kwangoko kuphuhlise ukuphuhliswa kakubi kwemfazwe. Iingcamango ezisabisayo umntwana azikwazi ukufundisa umntwana ukuba aziphathe kakuhle xa kwenzeka ingozi. Ungesabisi umntwana ukwenzela ukuba ababenecala bangabikho kuyo yonke into, ngoko ke unako ukwesaba ukuphuma endlwini. Ukongezelela, unokuphazamisa ingqondo yengqondo yomntwana, kwaye ushiye umkhondo ongeyonto ekuphuculeni phambili komntwana. Iingcali zithi:
Oko kuthethayo akudingekile ...
- Unokuthunjwa.
- Musa ukuthetha nabantu abangaziwayo.
- Kujikeleze enye ingqondo.
- Ngoku awukwazi ukuthemba umntu.
- Abantwana akufanele bahambe epakini, kuyingozi.
Indlela yokuthetha ...
- Ukuba ubona ukuba umntu usondele kuwe, ngoko ...
- Uya kulungile, ukuba ...
- Ubuso abangaqhelekanga kufuneka baziphathe njengale ...
- Abantu abaninzi banokuthenjwa, kodwa ...
- Unokuncedwa ...
Ngokuqinisekileyo, xelela ootitshala abancinci nabafundisi bezontathu ukuba bangabathumeli abantwana babo kwikhaya nabantu abangabaziyo uze ucele isicelo esibhaliweyo.
Abantwana mabafanele bakwazi ukuzikhusela. Ukuze uzikhusele, umntwana angaphula yonke into evimbelayo kwaye aphule imida. Umntwana akufanele acinge ngezinto eziza kwenzeka xa asebenzisa iindlela zokuzikhusela. Mxelele umntwana ukuba ngaba unokumlimaza ngandlela-thile umoni, ngoko akukho mntu uya kumgxeka, kodwa ngokuchaseneyo, mdumise. Tshela umntwana apho indawo ezininzi zisengozini (i-eyeballs, larynx, kunye ne-groin) zihlala zikhona, kwaye ukuba kunokwenzeka, zibafundise indlela yokubetha ngokuchanekileyo kwezi ndawo. Ngaphezu koko, cacisa umntwana apho kufuneka afune uncedo nalapho uphumelele khona ukuba kukho ingozi.
Yintoni ongayenza ukuba umntwana wakho okanye othandekayo athunjwa kwaye adibaniswe?
Okokuqala, kufuneka uqiniseke ukuba umphathi uphila kwaye kulungile. Ukuba awukholelwa i-blackmailer, zama ukuthetha nomntwana okanye umntu osondeleyo kwifowuni, naphezu koko, zama ukuqinisekisa ukuba umphathi ukhulume ne-swami ehlala, kwaye anganikeli ukurekhoda kwezwi. Xa uthetha kumntu okhawuleza, unqabise phantsi kwaye uthi wenze konke ukukhutshwa ngokukhawuleza kunokwenzeka. Chaza ukuba kule meko umntwana (umntu osondeleyo) kufuneka azalise zonke iimfuno zolwaphulo-mthetho, ngaphandle koko angazilimaza. Musa ukucinga malunga nokufumana apho abaphangi-oku kufanele kwenziwe ngabaqeqeshi kwaye oku kunokulimaza umntu osondeleyo.
Xa uthetha nomntwana (umhlobo osondeleyo), phulaphulaphula ngokukhawuleza kumngane we-blackmailer. Hlola imeko, iimfuno zesigebengu kunye nendlela ephakamileyo yokusongela ngayo. Kwimeko nayiphi na into, zama ukukholisa umenzi wecala lo kuphoswa (ukuphindaphinda, ukudibana kwakhona).
Ukuba ucinga ukuba ufuna uncedo, sebenzisa ngokukhawuleza. Iingcali ziya kufuna ixesha elide ukuphuhlisa nokuphumeza ukusebenza. Awudingi nawaphi na amanyathelo, ngokucacileyo kwaye uzama ngokuzenzekelayo ukuzalisekisa zonke iimfuno zeenkonzo ezizodwa (ukusuka kwingxoxo kunye ne-blackmailer kwifowuni kumashishini okutshintshiselana kwamashishini).
Ukuba awuceli uncedo uze wenze ngokuzimela, ngoko ufuna ukuba akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngomntwana (imali, ixabiso, ulwazi, utshintshi livela kuphela xa umntwana enikelwa kwindawo ephephile ephantsi kweliso lwakho). Ngaphandle koko, kukho umngcipheko wokuba, emva kokufumana okufunwayo, izigebengu ziya kubulala umkhombandlela ukuze ulahlekise ubungqina obukhoyo.
Xa udlulisela ixabiso, lungiselela ukuba abantu abangabamnyama bangakwazi ukwenza ngokungalindelekanga. Kungakhathaliseki ukuba yiyiphi, zama ukutshintshisana kwaye kungabi ngekhefu lesibini kwinkampani yezigwenxa.