Imibuzo ebuzwa ngokuphindaphindiweyo yabantwana abaselula

"Mama, bavela phi abantwana?"; "Kutheni le malume enesisu esinjalo?"; "Ngaba unina okanye umalume?" Kutheni unayo isadevu, ukuba ungumama? "Mhlawumbi, kuyo yonke imibuzo engathandekiyo ebantwaneni abaza kubazali babo, abo bangabamsulwa. Kanti - njani ukuphendula? Imibuzo ebuzwa ngokuphindaphindiweyo yabantwana abancinci yintloko yecandelo.

Khumbula iindaba zePikling malunga nendlovu eyaziwayo? Wathuthuzela iintlobo ezininzi - kunye neenciniba, kunye ne-hegemonic, kunye nabo bonke - kunye nemibuzo yakhe engapheliyo abahlala bemvuza ngayo. Kodwa oku akusilo siphelo: Indlovu ehlaseleyo kodwa engabonakaliyo iya kwingwenya-ukuba ifumene into ayidla ngayo ummangaliso. Wakwazi ukungaba sisidlo, kunye nenkumbulo yemfazwe nenkobe isele ishiywe isiqu ... Abazali abaninzi, ndicinga , bazibamba ngesifiso esingenakunqandeka sokuthi bavale ngandlela-thile "i-slob" yabo. Kodwa sisezidalwa ezinengqiqo kuneziqhawe zeengongoma ze-Kipling. Asisebenzisi izijeziso zomzimba "kwizigwenxa", nokuba zizalisekisa ngekhulu lemibuzo ukususela ekuseni kuze kube sebusuku, phakathi kwazo ezingenakukhathazeka, eziza kuphazamisa nabani na ...

Ikhulu lamawaka "Kutheni?"

Into ephambili - phefumula kakhulu, ungakhathazeki uze uthathe ngokungathandekiyo ukuba umntwana wakho ngale ndlela akafani nhlobo. Yakhula nje ibe yinto ehlekisayo kunye engayibalekiyo - "iminyaka yobuzathu". Kwiminyaka engama-3-5, imibuzo ehlukahlukeneyo, kubandakanywa ezinjalo ezikhohlisayo, zityhalala kuwo wonke umntu, njengesikhwama esivuzayo, kwaye oku kuyinto engokwemvelo. Kukho abantwana abaneminyaka engama-400 ukuya ku-500 ukuya ku-5 ubudala ngosuku. Akumangalisi kukuba, kule ntlupheko ephazamisayo "ayinakukhathazeka". Abantwana beza kwihlabathi apho baqondwa khona, kwaye ngubani, ngaphandle kwakho, uya kuchaza indlela yonke into ehlelwe ngayo apha? Ukubuza imibuzo, umntwana ugxila ekudaleni umfanekiso wakhe wehlabathi. Kuyo akukho nto ibalulekileyo kunye nesibini - inokukhathaza yonke into. Ngaphezu koko, ukwandisa ukwazi kunye nekhono kubantwana, umnqweno wokubamba iimpumlo yakho yonke indawo inokuba yinye yeempawu zobuchule bokudala. Ngoko ke kuhle kakhulu xa umntwana ebuza imibuzo; Kubi xa engenzi. Ngoko, umntwana onokulibaziseka ekuphuhliseni kwengqondo sele ephuzile kwaye enemibuzo ethi "Kutheni?". Apha kule meko kuyimfuneko ukuqonda ngokucacileyo izizathu kwaye, mhlawumbi, ngoncedo lwesazi sengqondo okanye ugqirha. Ngako oko, ungalokothi uphawule i-pochemchku yakho, nangona ukuthanda kwakhe ulwazi kubonakala kukugqithiseleyo, kunye nemibuzo - engafanelekiyo. Yaye ke, ungabahleki - ngokuba ukuhleka kwakho kunokukhawuleza ukuphelisa umnqweno wokubuza nayiphi na imibuzo evela kuye. Kukho na, nawe. Cinga, kuba asisamangalisi kwaye sithinteke ngemibuzo yabantwana efana nale: "Kutheni kubonayo?", "Kutheni ndiza kulala ikamela?" Okanye "Kutheni ndihamba ngeebhotile kunye nekati - ingubo yeengubo?". Le mibuzo kunye neminye eminye yabantu abadala bayaphendula ngokuzithelekileyo nangenkcukacha, ngaphandle kokufihla nantoni na. Kodwa inkunzi yintliziyo engenacala kwaye ilula. Kuye, akukho zifundo zeetabhu ezamkelekileyo kuluntu olukhulileyo. Ngoko ke, akufanele sihlukane nemiba evela kuyo, senze i-systematic thematic ngokwemibono yethu: lo mbuzo unokuphendulwa, kodwa oku akunakwenziwa, kusasa kakhulu okanye ngokubanzi - luhlobo luni lobutshinga? Khumbula: ayikho into engcolileyo okanye engumntu oyisiphukuphuku, kubakho impendulo engalunganga okanye isisindululo kubo abadala.

"Unamahloni ukubuza into enjalo!"

Ukuvakalisa ukucaphukisa kunye nentukuthelo yakho, uyamgxotha umntwana kwaye uphinde ummisele ukuba afune iimpendulo ezivela kwabanye abantu. Ukongezelela, akafanele azive enetyala lokuba wabuza le nto okanye loo mbuzo. Akazange akwenze ngenjongo, kungekhona ukukucasula, ukuqhubela kwipende. Wayebuza nje, kuba wayenomdla, kwaye yikho konke. "Ngoku uSeryozha uza ekhaya aze adle i-cottage cheese ..." Ingcamango yokutshintsha ingqalelo kwenye into ayiyintsha, le yindlela yobugcisa yokuxhaphaza, eyaziwayo kwiengqondo. Kwezinye iimeko le nto inokusebenza, kodwa ixeshana nje. Uza kubona - kungekudala umntwana uya kucela le nto okanye "efanayo" engafanelekanga. Ingaba uyaqonda ukuba awuyithandi loo mbuzo, ukuba wakhupha into ephosakeleyo, kwaye kutheni - akucaci, kwaye uya kuziva unetyala ngaphandle kwecala. Kuye kwavela ukuba "ukuguqulelwa kweentoloko" akunjalo. Umntwana ufuna ulwazi, kwaye uzakwenza yonke imizamo yokuyifumana.

"Uya kukhula - uya kukwazi!" Cha, ukuva impendulo enjalo, umntwana akayi kulinda, xa ekhula. Emva kwakho konke, imibuzo yabantwana abaselula bayisoloko bekhohlakeleyo. Umntwana udinga ulwazi ngokukhawuleza, kwaye ufunda yonke into ngokukhawuleza, kungekhona kuwe kuphela, kodwa evela kumaqabane aphezulu. Kwaye bathi bakuxelele khona, ngawaphi amagama, wena kunye nephupha elibi ngeke uphuphe. Kuyo yonke indawo iindawo zokubilisa, kwaye yonke indawo kukho iingcali zayo ezincinci - nakwi-kindergarten, nase-yard, nakwi-sandbox. Ngoko kungcono ukuthatha lo msebenzi ngokwakho. Buza unyoko (uyise, ugogo, utata). " Ukutsho oku, uvele umtyumbele umntwana. Ukubonisa ukungabi nandaba kwaye, ngaphezu koko, uncedo. Igunya lakho elikhulu lincibilika phambi kwamehlo akho. Hayi, ekubeni umbuzo ubhekiswe kuwe, kwaye wena kuphela kufuneka uphendule.

Ezinye iimpendulo zingaphendulwa ngokuthe ngqo, ngezinga elithe xaxa, kodwa zifikeleleke kwimibono yabantwana. Njengokuba uthetha nomntu omdala, kulula kakhulu. Enye indlela yokuphendula imibuzo enjalo yiphakamiso sesicelo "sokucinga kunye." Olu luhambo oluhle kakhulu lwezopolitiko - buza umntwana oko akucinga ngako. Ngokuqinisekileyo unayo inguqu yakhe - apha kwaye uxoxe ngawo. Mhlawumbi umntwana uya kuthetha into ecacileyo kwaye esondele kwi nyaniso. Kodwa nangona iingcamango zakhe zingekho ngokoqobo, uya kumnika ithuba lokuba angakuphulaphuli, kodwa ukuba ube ngu-interlocutor yakho, ukuba ucacise, kwaye oku kuyisifundo esibalulekileyo. Ixesha lemibuzo engapheliyo, kuquka "ukungakhululeki", iya kubaleka ngokukhawuleza. Yaye wena-ngokwendlela efunyenwe ngayo - ubomi bakho buya kukhangela iimpendulo kwiimfuno ezibalulekileyo zomntwana wakho okhulileyo, nangona sele sele ephelile ukuzibuza.

Malunga nalo

Kukho umbuzo othi "ongenakwenzeka" ukuba bonke abantwana babuze abazali babo. Umbuzo malunga nokuba bavelaphi. Indlela ephawulekayo yenziwa yintombazana enye, intombi yamafilologists aqhelekileyo: "Mama, bapapasha njani abantwana?" Nantsi le Sonja eneminyaka emihlanu kunye nabantwana bemizi banamhlanje bayakuzabalaza ukubonisa ingqungquthela yeklabishi, isorkork okanye ivenkile. Mhlawumbi abazange babone i-storks nonke, iklabishi yayibonakala kuphela kwivenkile, kwaye yiziphi ivenkile ezikhoyo zivakala kakuhle. Ngoko le ndlela ayikho ndawo efanelekileyo. Umbuzo omdala othandwa kakhulu kulo mbuzo uhlala kwibinzana eliqhelekileyo: "Abantwana bavela kumama kamama," kodwa umntwana wamanje akayiyo ukuze azinqabile kule nto. Kungenzeka ukuba uya kucela. Kwaye akukho zikholo. Kucacile ukuba kunye nomntwana oneminyaka emithathu kule sihloko kufuneka ukhulume ngokwahlukileyo kunomntwana oneminyaka emihlanu ubudala, kunye nentombazana - eyahlukileyo kunomfana. Kubalulekile ukuba uphendule lo mbuzo ngendlela yokuba ulwazi olufunyenwe aluyikwesabisi ngendalo engqongqo, kodwa ukuxilwa apha akusiyo imfuneko: kulo mntwana umntwana uya kuziva ukuba abazali bahlala into ehlazo kuye, kwaye oku, kunakho ukuxhatshazwa kwengqondo .

Ukucinga Ngokubambisana

Ngamagama, apha njengomdlalo - "Ewe kunye noyena musa ukumnyama nomhlophe musa ukuthatha". Musa ukukratshi, ungabi nobuqili, uze ungabi nomsindo. Zonke ezinye ziza kuwe. Akukho zicwangciso eziqhelekileyo apha, bonke abantwana bahluke, kwaye kuxhomekeka kakhulu kwi-intuition yakho yabazali, okuya kukuvumela ukuba ufumane amagama afanelekileyo kunye negama elifanelekileyo kwingxoxo kunye nosana, ungaguquki kwiimimiselo. Into ephambili - ukunika iimpendulo kwiinkalo ezinzulu, qwalasela umgangatho wophuhliso lomntwana. Into engayayiqondiyo ingaba yindiza idlulileyo. Ukongezelela, khumbula: nayiphi na ingcaciso, kubandakanywa nento leyo umntwana eyayifumana kuwe, ayiquki nje kuphela iinyani, kodwa nokuhlolwa kwazo. Kwaye kulo mzekelo, ukuhlola kwakho kubalulekile, nguye oza kwenza isimo sengqondo somntwana "kwizifundo ezixhasayo" zeengxoxo. Ukubeka nje, akukhathazeki ukuba yiliphi igama umalume athetha ngalo kwisitoretha kuthetha, kubalulekile ukuba igama alilungile. Kwaye omnye umalume unamanqatha, ngenxa yokuba uyagula, sele sele ekhuni kakhulu, ngoko masibahawukele, kwaye asiyi kumkhomba ngomnwe.