Imithetho yokukhulisa abantwana kubazali


Ngaba sisoloko sicinga malunga nantoni na? Ngelishwa, akuninzi kakhulu. Kwaye, ngenxa yokudumisa ngenye yezona zixhobo ezibalulekileyo zokufundisa nokwenza kubantwana bethu ilungelo - ukubonakaliswa ngokwaneleyo malunga nehlabathi elizungezile kunye ngokwayo. Kodwa wonke umzali (okanye malunga nomntu wonke) ufuna abantwana bakhe bakhule kwaye baqine ngokuziphatha nangokwenyama. Kwaye kubaluleke kakhulu, ukuba bayonwabile. Kwaye konke oku kufumaneka ngokusebenzisa imithetho elula yokukhulisa abantwana kubazali, ngokuphathelele indumiso kwinkqubo yokunxibelelana.

Ukudumisa ubugcisa, kodwa wonke umntu uyakwazi ukuyiqonda. Ukwenza oku, kufuneka nje ufunde amaqiniso ambalwa kwaye uwakhumbule rhoqo xa uya kukhwaza okanye udumise inzala yakho. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukukhetha indawo kunye nexesha elifanelekileyo lokudumisa, ukulinganisa ngokweemeko, ukucinga malunga nawaphi amagama esichaza ngayo iimvakalelo ezasisondeza. Ukudumisa kunokukhuthaza nokukhubekisa umntu, ukuzola kunye ne-pamper. Kodwa masenze yonke into ngokulandelelana.

1. Umqulu kufuneka uzwise ukunyaniseka

Le, ngelanga, ayisoloko isebenza. Inhloko iyaqonda ukuba ubonakala ufanele ukuvuma, ukuvuya, kwaye ungayiva intliziyo: kuba yintoni? Ngokomzekelo, thina, abantu abadala, sikhumbule amanyathelo okuqala kule bomi kakubi. Ngoko ke, maxa wambi kunzima kubazali ukuba bacinge ukuba unzima kangakanani umzwenzana owenzayo xa ufunda ukwenza izinto eziphambili: ujike emhlane ukuya kwisisu, uhlale phantsi, ubambe itekisi, uze ubeke i-spoon, imile kwimilenze, njl njl. Okwangoku, isakhono ngasinye esifanele sifanele sidunyiswe. Emva kwakho konke, intsana yayisebenza, kwaye njani! Ngokukodwa xa ucinga ukuba abantwana abanempilo abazalwanga kakhulu ngoku. Yaye ukuba imisipha yomntwana ingekho kwi-tonus, kukho ukubonakaliswa kwee-rickets okanye ezinye iingxaki zeintsana, intshukumo entsha inikwe ngokusebenzisa imizamo ye-titanic. Kwaye kufuna ukuba kuvunywe ngabantu abadala. Kwaye umncinci umntwana, ocebileyo, otyumayo uvakalelwa ngumbono kumagama ethu, ngelizwi. Ngako oko, ukubukela i-crumb yakho, zama ukuphindaphinda kuyo, ukugubungela, indlela zonke iimisipha ezinzima ngayo, ukuqhuba ubuchule obutsha. Emva koko amazwi amathandekayo awanakukugcina ulinde. Kunzima kakhulu kuba ngabazali abanyanisekileyo ngabantwana abaqala ukufunda ukufunda-ukubhala-count. Ngamanye amaxesha kubonakala ngathi inzala yakho yinto engadluliyo kunye ne-mediocrity. Ndifuna ukulibala malunga nayo yonke imimiselo yemfundo kwaye ndimemele okanye mhlawumbi ndiyeke umva, kodwa awukwazi! Kwinkqubo yokufunda, unokudumisa kuphela, kwaye udumise kwakhona, ngokunyanisekileyo. Ngaphandle koko, umnqweno wolwazi uya kulahla ngonaphakade. Nayi indlela yokuphuma: zama ukufumana izifundo kunye nomntwana wakho osemncinci wesikolo, obalaseleyo kwimimoya emihle. Kunzima kubazali, kodwa unokuzama. Zijabulise ngento phambi kweeklasi: uye esitolo uze uzithenge umlomo omtsha, ubukele ifilimu yakho oyintandokazi, ekugqibeleni, udle into enomnandi. Kwanjalo, isimo sengqondo sokuzinza siqinisekiso sokuthi uzimisele. Kuya kuba lula kuwe ukuba ubone ingqolowa phakathi kweentlanzi, ukubona i-letters ephathekayo phakathi kwezihlomelo ezimbi, apho ufanele uzukise, ulive ilizwi olifunde ngaphandle kweeposiso. Kwaye ukuba unendima emnyama kwindawo yakho okanye yecandelo lobugcisa, zama ukufumana umntu oza kuthatha indawo esikhundleni sakho ngeeklasi kunye nomntwana.

2. Indumiso kufuneka ibe kwaye kwimeko kuphela

Kuya kubonakala ukuba le nto isisiseko, ifinyelelwe into ethile, yafezekisa into ethile - fumana inxalenye yendumiso. Nangona kunjalo, yonke into ayilula. Ngamnye wethu unikwe inani elithile lezakhono kule ndawo okanye kwintsimi yomsebenzi. Ukuba umntwana unetalente kwinto ethile, ukumdumisa kufuneka ukuba lumkele kakhulu, ekubeni impumelelo, "yifumane" kuye ngokulula kwaye ngokwemvelo njengomoya, isiqingatha sokuphumelela. I-géeni engaphezu kwamanqaku angabonakaliyo, kwaye emva koko kuya kuba buhlungu kuye kwaye kunzima ukuhla ezulwini ukuya emhlabeni. Nangona kunjalo, kunye nokugqithisa ukuthula, izimpumelelo ezithunyelwe ezivela ezulwini nazo azifanelekanga. Masithi umntwana wakho ngumculi ngokwemvelo? Mkhulu! Kodwa, ngelixa udumisa umzobo wakhe olandelayo, ngenyameko yazi ukuba akuyiyo yonke into incike kwi talente, into omele uyenze ukuyifunda, umzekelo, ukuchaneka, imithetho ethile yokupenda, njl njl. Ngokuqhelekileyo uya naye kumyuziyam kwaye anike izikhokelo zokufunda, ukuze umntu omncinci aqonde ukuba kukho i-mastermasters eyimkhulu kakhulu kule fomu yobugcisa.

3. Ukuthelekisa ukutyekisa kuyithuluzi eliyingozi

Se benzisa kuphela kwiimeko ezibucayi, ngelixa uzama ukulinganisa ukufaneleka kwezingane ezifaniswayo. Ukuba unabantwana abaningana kunye nomdala kaninzi bazama ukuxubusha malunga nokuba abantwana bafumana yonke into embi kwaye bahamba ngokukhawuleza, zama ukumkhumbuza kaninzi ukuba yonke into

Kwakwenzeka into efanayo kuye ngexesha labo. Ngaphandle koko, zama ukuncoma abancinci ngempumelelo yabo encinci phambi komdala, ukwenzela ukuba uya kugxininiswa nesimo sakho sengqondo kunye nentlonipho kwimpumelelo yabo. Emva koko, abantwana bahlala bekopisha indlela abazali abaziphatha ngayo kwaye bafuna ukuxelisa ngokungazi. Kwaye umntu ophezulu kufuneka adunyiswe phambi kwezingane, ukuze bafune ukuphinda impumelelo yakhe kwixesha elizayo.

Kwimeko apho wena, umntwana wakho okanye ootitshala baqala ukuthelekisa abantwana abalingana beminyaka efanayo, bacinge ngamagama onke. Ingaba umntwana wakho uyazikhukhumeza ngenxa yokuba ufumene ibanga elihle kwiklasi umsebenzi ozimeleyo? Qinisekisa ukumxelela ukuba uyavuya kakhulu ngaye. Ndixelele ngokunyanisekileyo. Ewe, unomdla, uqaphele, ukhawuleza, kwaye uyaziqhayisa ngaye. Kodwa ke undikhumbuze indlela owachitha ngayo ngokuhlwa kunye neencwadi zezifundo kunye naye. Masithi: mhlawumbi abanye abafana babenomsebenzi obaxakekileyo kubazali babo kwaye abanakubanceda njani ukulungiselela kakuhle? Ngenxa yoko, impumelelo yayo yinkalo ethile.

Ukuba impumelelo yomntwana iyimpumelelo yakhe kwaye yena, ngokuqhelekileyo, uzama ukuzincoma ngaphezu koontanga, emva kokudumisa uzame ukumkhumbuza ukuba abanye abantu banezinye izixhobo ezingenalo. Masithi ukuphumelela kwinqanaba lomkhosi kwiimathematika. Eli sihlandlo kubazali ukulungiselela iholide encinane yeentsapho. Kodwa akukho sikhokelo sokumncedisa uPetrov ngenxa yokuba i-mathematici isoloko inezintathu kunye nee-deuces. Emva kwakho konke, uPetrova wamukelwa kwikomiti yebhola yebhola, kwaye umntwana wakho akanandaba nemidlalo, ukuyibeka ngobumnene.

Kwaye, ngokuchasene noko, ukuba umntwana wakho uhamba ngonaphakade ngezinyembezi kunye nokulila malunga nento elahla emva kwendawo engqongileyo, zama ukufumana (kunye, ngokuqinisekileyo) indawo ethile yomsebenzi apho impumelelo yakhe iya kuba phezulu kunezo zabanye abantwana. Umzekelo, i-hobby, edlalwa rhoqo kubahlobo. Ekugqibeleni, zama rhoqo ukudumisa umntwana ngomsebenzi wakhe, ukuzama ukusondela kwimiphumo yabalingane abalingane abanamakhono okanye abahlobo. Chaza ukuba zonke izakhono zahlukileyo, kodwa abantu abaxhamliyo nje abakhoyo. Ukuba kuyimfuneko, hamba kwi-kindergarten, ukuya esikolweni uze uzame ukuxoxa ngazo zonke ezi ngutitshala. Ukuqhathanisa ukudumisa kudinga ukulinganisela!

4. Musa ukunyamekela!

Ewe, sonke, ubuncinci, baninzi, sinokuqiniseka ukuba umntwana wethu uyona mhle. Kodwa umntu ufihla le ngcamango eminzini yomphefumlo wakhe, kodwa uzama ukuba ngumnqophiso phezu komhlaba, kwaye umntu ufuna ukuhlonishwa kobukhulu bomntwana kubo bonke abantu. Futhi udumise umntwana ngandlela-thile ebusweni bakhe phambi kwabanye, ukungahoyi yonke imigaqo yemfundo. Le ndlela ifumaneke ngeengozi ezimbini. Eyokuqala kukuba kukudumisa. Umntu omncinci, kwaye ngokukodwa umntwana osemtsha, ojwayele ukuva ukuvavanya ngokukhawuleza ekwidilesi yakhe, uya kufundiswa kakhulu kangangokuthi uyayeka ukuthathwa njengomvuzo. Kule meko, ngezinye iinkcukacha uza kufumanisa ukuba awukwazi ukusebenzisa udumo njengenkuthazo yokuqhubeka nemizamo kwelinye icala. Yaye ekulahleni kwakho kuya kuba neyokukhuthaza kuphela, kwaye oku akusoloko kulungeleleneyo kwaye kuncedo.

Ingozi yesibini iyingozi kakhulu. Akukho mfihlo yokuba abanye abantu bexhomekeke ekuxhomekeke kwengqondo ekudumiseni, njengesiza. Yaye xa ubomi bujika ikhondo layo ngendlela yokuba umama nobaba bengenakuhlala besondele, kwaye abanye abayi kummangalisa ngokungapheli lo mntu, kuya kuba nzima kakhulu. Yaye olu hlobo loxinzelelo alukwazi ukuba wonke umntu aphile ngaphandle kokulahlekelwa ngokuziphatha okukhethekileyo. Enyanisweni, ekuxhomekeke ekudongeni ekudumiseni kudla ngokuwa kunye nabantu beqela elihluke ngokupheleleyo, ngoko ke hamba umyalelo wesihlanu.

5. Abantwana abangonwabileyo kuyingozi njengoko badumisa!

Ingqwalasela ngokukodwa kufuneka inikelelwe ngolu hlobo kuba bantwana, banamahloni kwaye banamahloni ngokweziko, kunye nabo baqalisile, ngenxa yezizathu ezithile, ukwenza i-complex inferiority complex.

Kwenzekile ukuba uninzi lwabantu ngenye indlela luxhomekeka kwiimbono zabanye. Kwaye umntwana, imvume okanye ukugxekwa kwabazali ngumlinganiselo wothando lwabo ngenzalo yabo. Kwaye sihlala silibala malunga nalo. Ngokomzekelo, umntwana okhohlakeleyo, kodwa onamandla okanye onetalente udinga inxalenye enkulu yokuvunywa kwemlomo evela kunina nonina kunomntwana wamandla aqhelekileyo, kodwa uhlala enentlalontle, eqinisekile. Yaye nabazali bakubheka ngezinye iinkalo ukusuka kwinqanaba elihlukile: azikho iingxaki kumntwana, kwaye kakuhle. Ufunda ngokuqhelekileyo, uziphatha ngokufanelekileyo, uthetha ukuba ulandelelana aze ahambelane "nomgangatho", esinye esinye isizathu sokumkhathaza "ngesisa"? Kwabanye abantwana le nkqubo yabazali ibonwa njengesijeziso. Musa ukudumisa, ngoko andiyiyo ngokwaneleyo, andizange ndizame kakhulu. Bakhuphuka esikhumbeni sabo, ukuze bafumane imvume. Kwaye baziva beyathuthuzela kuphela kwezo zihlandlo ezingaqhelekanga xa abazali, ekugqibeleni, babonisa imvume yabo.

Ukunganakwa, ihloni, kodwa abantwana abanokwazi - oku kudidi lwesibini lwabantu abahlala bexhomekeke ekuxhaseni. Ukukhula, abantu abanjalo bavame ukumela umbukiso onobuhlungu: zonke izenzo zabo zijoliswe "ukukhaba", nangayiphi na indlela yokuphumeza indumiso kunye nokunyaniseka kwabanye. Kuba kungenjalo ubomi buya kubonakala bubukhulu kwaye bubhubhise, phantsi kwesiqubulo esithi: "Akukho mntu uyandithandayo!" Kwabo bahlala bethatha imifanekiso kunye nabo, ngezinye iinkathazo bazibongoze ukuhlala badumisa kwaye baphulaphule oko "feat" ndoda, kwaye bayeka ukuthetha ...

6. Cinga ukuba uthetha bani na.

Okanye, njengamanye amaxesha abantu beselula bathi: "Hlaziya i-bazaar!" Akukho namnye kuthi uya kucinga ukuxelela umntwana oneminyaka elilodwa into enjengale: "Ndinezinto ezintle zokuziphatha kunye nokuhleleka, ukujonga indlela oyipende ngayo!" Kodwa oomama nabazali bavame ukuzivumela ngokubhekiselele kubantwana abasele bekhulile beli binzana elithi "Umnichka!", "Molodchinka!", "Hayi, uyinto enhle!", "Mhle, mntwana!" kwaye umntwana uyamkela ingxaki kunokuba abe nemizwa emihle. Awuvumi nje ukuvunywa kwamagama kula mazwi, kuphela into ecacileyo kuye: abazali bakhe bayamjonga njengincinci! Ewe, ke ungakhubeki. Ukuze ukhethe kakuhle ingxoxo yakho nomntwana omdala, zama ukuthetha naye ngakumbi kwaye uphulaphule amagama awasebenzisayo. Maye maxa wambi baphoswe, kodwa le ngongoma leyo umntwana eyiqondayo, kungekhona nje ngentloko yakhe, kodwa nangentliziyo yakhe. Ukuba awunalo ithemba lememori yakho, bhala phantsi iingxoxo zakho nomntwana amaxesha ambalwa kwi-tape recorder (tape recorder), uze ulalele kwindawo ekhululekile. Akukho nto enyantisayo malunga nokuba ngelinye ilanga wena esikhundleni somlindi: "Wena ungumfana wam!" Uya kunika into efana nale: "Klevo!", "U-Otpad nje!" (Okanye, ukhetha ukuyivakalisa njani?) Iilutsha soloko uxabisa umnqweno wabazali ukuqonda iimfuno zabo kunye neminqweno.

Ewe, ukuba awukwazi ukwenza oku, khumbula ibinzana elowo wonke umntu uyaqonda - ukususela kwi-0 ukuya kweyama-99: "Ndiqhayisa ngawe!" Yithi kuphela ngokunyanisekileyo, ngeentliziyo. Yenza umgudu omncinane kuwe kwaye kungekudala uza kuziva ukuba kukukhulu kangakanani ukuthetha nomntwana wakho ngolwimi olunye! Ukongezelela kwimithetho yokukhulisa abantwana, abazali kufuneka bakhumbule ngokuqonda okulula kunye nomntwana kunye nothando olungenakuthatyathwa.