Ixesha lexeshana
Ukutshintshwa kokukhula kuhamba kancane. Amanqanaba alo adibaniswanga kakhulu kunye nezinguqu zezinto eziphilayo njengezinga lemfundo kunye neziqinisekiso zobungcali. Utshintsho ukusuka kwesinye isigaba ukuya kwesinye luya kukhunjulwa ngokudlulisela uviwo kwilayisenisi yokuqhuba iimviwo zezikolo ukuya kubafundi abaphumelele esikolweni okanye ukubhiyozela iminyaka eyi-18. Isiganeko ngasinye sichaza esinye isinyathelo ekuhambeni olude ukuya ekukhuleni nasekuzimele.
Ukuzimisela kokuzimela
Kwimimandla yanamhlanje kunokuba nzima ukuyiqonda xa umntwana osemtsha emele ngokuzimeleyo. Ngokomzekelo, abafundi abaninzi abaneminyaka engama-25 ubudala basencike ngokwezimali kubazali babo.
• Ukuzimela, kokubili kwemali kunye nemvakalelo, kuyona nto ebalulekileyo ekukhuleni. Ngamanye amaxesha kunzima ukugqiba iminyaka yokufikelela kwayo, okanye izibophelelo zengcali. Kwakhona, ngenxa yokunyuka kwexabiso lentengiso, kukho ukuthambekela kokuhlala kwindlu yabazali. Ubuntwaneni, iimpawu zokuqala zokuzimela zibonakaliswe yizingane ziyaziwa ngokuba "cha" okanye "Ndifuna ukwenza oko ngokwam". Xa abantwana beqala ukufumana inkululeko enkulu ekuhambeni kwabo, bayaqonda ukuba bahlukeneyo nabazali babo. Ukuhlaselwa komsindo, uphawu lomntu oneminyaka emi-2 ubudala, luphawu lokuba abantwana bafuna ukwenza ngokwabo. Nangona kunjalo, lo mnqweno uhambelana nomvakalelo wokucaphuka ngenxa yokungakwazi ukuhlangabezana nazo zonke iingxaki zehlabathi ezikujikelezile. Kwiminyaka emibini phakathi kweminyaka emi-2 ne-3, abaninzi abantwana baqala ukuzivakalelwa njengomntu ozimeleyo. Ulwazi oluzimele lukhokelela kwimpawu zokuqala zenceba-ukukwazi ukuqonda nokuphendula ngokufanelekileyo iimvakalelo zabanye.
Ukwenza ukhetho
Ixesha lokukhula lixesha apho umfana ekhetha ukuba angayishiyi ixesha lakhe elidlulileyo kwaye abe ngumntu ohlukileyo okanye azame ukuquka amava amandulo ekuzikhuleni. Indlela yokukhula iquka amanyathelo athile ebomini. Ngokomzekelo, ukudlula iimviwo zokuqhuba iilayisensi ngumzekelo wokwandiswa kwenkululeko. Ukuqhaqhaqhaqhaqhayisa komsindo kubantwana abaselula bafakazela umzabalazo oqhubekayo phakathi komnqweno wokuzimela kunye nokungakwazi ukuzinyamekela. Isazi sengqondo sengqondo u-Eric Erickson ukholelwa ukuba bonke abaselula bayabhekana neengxaki zobuntu-indawo apho umntu omdala angakhula khona kwelinye icala. Kuyabonakala xa umntwana osemncinci engazange anqume ukuba ngubani ofuna ukuzibona yena nendlela angathanda ukuzibonakalisa ngayo. Ngeli xesha, abantwana abaselula bayakwazi ukuvavanya nezambatho ngendlela yokuziphatha ngobundlelwane nobomi
Ukutshintshela kwiimeko eziguqukayo
Ngokungafani no-Erickson, ezinye iingqondo zengqondo zithi ukuguquka komntu kuxhomekeke ngakumbi kwiimeko ezitshintshayo kunokuba ubudala okanye ukukhula komzimba. Bakholelwa ukuba kwiimeko ezintsha zentlalo, utshintsho luvela kumntu oqolileyo ngokusasazeka komntu, kwaye le nkqubo inokuqhubeka ebomini. Abo banqwenela kwimfundo ephakamileyo, utshintsho olukhulu luya kugcinwa ngexesha lokufunda kwabo kwiikholejini okanye kwiyunivesiti, kungekhona esikolweni.
• Ukuvakalelwa kweqela lezentlalo kubaluleke kakhulu kubantu abatsha, kunye nokwamkelwa kwabo kwintlalo phakathi koontanga. Abaselula bathambekele ekufundiseni abaontanga bakho kumculo kunye nezambatho. Ekupheleni kweminyaka engama-10 ekufikeni kwintsholongwane kubakho ukugatya ngokukhawuleza kobuhlobo kwiimeko zesini esifanayo. Kwiiqela ezixhatshazwayo, izibini zihlala zenziwa. Abaphandi bafumanisa ukuba ukuphuhliswa komntu osemncinci kuphuculwe ngcono ukufezekisa impumelelo xa yena nabazali bakhe babelana ngeembono zabo ngobomi ngendlela enobubele.
Uhlobo
Kubonakala ukuba kubalulekile ukuba abantu bahlala kwintsimi engathathi hlangothi, aba bantu bengabantwana, kodwa kungekhona abantu abadala. Abanye abantu bezentlalo bathi abantwana abaselula bayenza inkcubeko ehlukeneyo kwizinga elincinci, bahambelana noluntu lonke. Umzobo wobudlelwane obunobungane kunye noluntu luya kutshintsha njengoko bekhula. Ngethuba lokuphelelwa ngumntwana, ubuhlobo bubonakala ngokubanzi kwiimeko zesini esifanayo kumaqela amancinci. Phakathi kwentshukumo yobutsha, amaqela amakhulu ahlukeneyo ahlukeneyo. Iingcali ezininzi zeengqondo zikholelwa ukuba ezininzi iinguqu ezinobuntu abatsha zichaphazelekayo kwiimeko ezithile kwaye utshintsho olukhulu luvela kumaziko aphakamileyo nakwimfundo ephakamileyo, kungekhona esikolweni.
Ukuhlukana kwintsapho
Ekuqaleni kwenkathi yobushushu, ubudlelwane bobuhlobo kugxininisa kwimisebenzi edibeneyo, kwaye ngokuhamba kwexesha, amantombazana aqhubekekayo ekuphumezeni nasekugxininiseni ngakumbi ubudlelwane phakathi koontanga.
I ngcamango
Njengoko ukhula, uvakalelo lwengqondo lungavela. Ikhono lokucinga elingabonakaliyo livumela abantwana ukuba bachaze ezinye iindlela zentsapho, ezenkolo, ezopolitiko nezokuziphatha. Abantu abadala, kunye namava abo obomi obukhulu, banemibono engakumbi kunye nokungahambisani phakathi kwezi mbono zimbini zibizwa ngokuthi "ingxabano yesizukulwana." Injongo kwanoma yiphi na intsapho kukugcina intombazana inxibelelana nabazali bakhe ukuze aqhubeke ephulaphule iingcebiso zabo, kodwa kwimeko yokukhulula inkululeko.
I ntlonipho
Isigaba sokugqibela sokukhula, xa abantwana behlala bexhomekeka ngemali, kunokuba nzima kakhulu. Intsapho kufuneka ivumelane neziganeko zamabakala amabini abantu abadala abaphila ubomi obuhlukeneyo. Ulutsha lufuna inkululeko yokuhamba, imfihlo; Bafuna ukuthatha abahlobo babo endlwini kwaye banomuvo wokuba bavuke baze balale xa bathanda. Kodwa ukuba uqiniseke ngokunyaniseka kwakhe, umntu kufuneka azimelele kwaye akhululeke kubazali.