Abantwana bazalwa benesimo esiqhayisekileyo, imikhwa kunye nemikhwa, isimo sengqondo. Kubuqili ukulindela kwintombazana ekhulayo ukuba iya kuba ibhola, kwaye ingenalo ukuphulaphula ngokupheleleyo-ukuba iya kuphinda impumelelo ka-Vanessa Meyi.
Kodwa abanye abazali babo bonke ubomi babo bayazikhumbula zabo ithemba elingazalisekiyo kubantwana babo. Kwaye ke abantwana, bekhathele ukulwa ilungelo lokuzimela, bazibuze: njani ukwenza ukuba abazali baqonde ukuba ukhulile? Ungabanceda njani ukuba bazivume ngokwabo - ngendlela oyiyo?
Abantwana ... Bangakanani kweli gama elihle kubazali! Ithemba kunye neenjongo zabo, amaphupha abo kunye nakho konke abangenayo ithuba lokuyenza kweli hlabathi-konke oku kufuneka kuzaliswe ngabantwana. Kodwa ngaba kunjalo?
Ilungelo lokuphutha
Abantwana ixesha elide banika iimpawu zabazali ezifanelekileyo ngakumbi koothixo. Kwaye abantwana "oothixo bendawo" bakholelwa kwikhulu leepesenti. Ubawo unamandla kunabo bonke. Umama uyona mhle kakhulu. Ukufikelela kwiminyaka emihlanu umhlaba wezingane usekelwe ngokuchanekileyo kwezi zikhundla.
Kodwa le nkqubo - isabelo sezimpawu zikaThixo - iyabelana. Emehlweni kubazali, abantwana bayindlela yokubonakalisa ithemba. Umsebenzi onzima, okhuseleyo ngaphandle kweentsuku zokuphuma - inkqubo yemfundo kunye nokulima nje kwesizukulwana esincinane - Ndingathanda ukulungiswa kwangaphambili ngenye imiphumo enomdla.
Kwaye ke, abantwana bayakhula, mhlawumbi bavuya nabazali abanezatifikethi ezincomekayo "zokuthatha inxaxheba" kunye neendondo "zokuphumelela." Kodwa ixesha lifika xa abantwana beba badala.
Ngokuqhelekileyo uvavanyo lokuqala, oluwela kwisabelo somntwana, luyimpumelelo kunye noviwo lokungena. Abantu abaninzi baya kubo, njengokungathi baya kubulawa, becinga malunga nendlela yokuqinisekisa ukuba abazali bayaqonda ukuba ukhulile. Kwaye endaweni yobungqina bafumana i-bun (eyenziwe kakuhle, izinikezelwe!), Okanye enye inkomfa (ididekile, ayizange idlule, awukhanyanga iikholeji efanelekileyo!)
Kwaye into yokuba abazali kufuneka bathembele kubantwana babo okokuqala. Emva koko, ukuba uqinisekisa isiqalo esineeminyaka emithathu ubudala, esithemba ngokuzithemba endleleni, ayinakudla nantoni na, ngoko awuyi kukwazi ukugqithisa uvavanyo lomntwana wakho. Ngoko kuvela ukuba abazali banomdla. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, intombi yabo isele ikhulile, njengoko yenza izinto angenayo nje uxanduva - unina okanye uyise kayinakwenza yona. Kwaye kwenye - uyaqhubeka nokuhlala nabazali bakhe ...
Ubomi kunye nabazali
Abantwana abakhulileyo bahlala besondelene nabazali babo. Kwaye kwangexesha elifanayo bacinga ukuba bangenza njani ukuze abazali baqonde ukuba ukhulile. Njengokuba umtshato okanye umtshato, ukuzalwa kwabantwana okanye isihloko esitsha senzululwazi singenziwa ukuze abazali baqonde ukuba ukhulile. Enyanisweni, kubazali bethu besihlala sisana ...
Ukuphila nabazali akulula. Kwaye kuzo zonke izinto eziphilayo kukho ubungqina bokuthi emva kwexesha abazali baqhwala kwaye bangabi nabulungisa. Emva koko, akuyiyo into yokuba izikhuku ezinobuqili zixoshwe ngaphandle kwenyenyana, ukuze zifunde ukuhamba.
Phakathi kwabantu, ngokuqhelekileyo kwenzeka ukuba ukuhlala nabazali unyaka ngamnye kunzima. Abazali kaninzi abaqapheli oku, kodwa inyaniso ihlala. Ukusuka "kwidleke lomzali" ekukhangela "ulonwabo lwakhe," okanye kunoko-ubomi bakhe, siyaqina kwaye silumke. Ngaphandle kwamava ethu, asikwazi ukunika nto kubantwana bethu
Singabantwana. Ngethuba nje abazali bephila
Ngokuqhelekileyo ubomi bomzali obudala, xa kunokubangela iingxaki ezininzi, kuthelekiswa nokufumana kwintlambo. Kwaye kwiphepha leli ngxondorha, owokuqala ephoseni ngabazali. Kwaye abantwana, ngelixa besenaso isizukulwana "esiphelweni", bazive benetembelo ngakumbi kwaye bekhuselekile ngakumbi.
Ngoko ke, kungakhathaliseki ukuba abantu abatsha bacinga njani ukwenza abazali babo baqonde ukuba uye wakhula, le ngcamango inomdaka. Ngoko ke, ubomi bethu bonke, nokuba bebonakalise ukuba sisizukulwana esikhulileyo, sihlala abantwana.
Ngesinye ixesha ndaxabelwa ngumalume wam. Indodana yakhe yayivame ukucela imali ye-pocket, nangona edibana nayo kwaye yahlala nomfazi, yayisebenza njengomlondolozi kunye nokukhanya kwenyanga njengomlindi webusuku. Xa umalume wazama ukwenza "isiphakamiso" - bathi, "awuboni na ukuba unyana wakho sele ekhulile?" - Uncle waphendula bonke ngokuhlakanipha.
Uthe ukuba kude kube ngoku, xa efika kunina, uvakalelwa njengomntwana. Ngokuchanekileyo kuba ekufikeni kwakhe ambalwa amathandayo ukusuka ebuntwaneni bokuba izitya zilungiselelwe, kwaye xa ehamba, unina uzama "ukunikela" ubuncinane ubuncinane. Ngoko uvakalelwa kukuba kukho enye indawo ekhuselekileyo nokhusekileyo emhlabeni. Ebona ukuba le ngcamango, nangona kunjalo, indoda eneminyaka engamashumi amane ifika kumama wayo ukuphumla kwiimbopheleleko eziqhubekayo kunye "nobomi bomntu omdala".
Akunakukwenza
Kukho iindlela ezininzi ezingaqinisekanga ukuba uvumele abazali bazi ukuba sele sikhule. Oko kukuthi, nokuba neendlela eziphambili zeengqondo zihlala ziphazamisa kwaye "ziphosakele." Kwaye kukho iindlela ezininzi, KUNGAZI ukubonisa (kunye nangaphezulu - ukubonisa!) Abazali ukuba sele sele ungumfazi omdala:
- ukutshata kuphela "ukubonisa umama"
- kubeletha umntwana
- ukuya kwesinye isixeko
- Ukuseka amashalofu ehlukeneyo kwiqrijini kwelinye indlu nabazali.
Konke oku kunokwandisa ingxabano, kwaye kwezinye iimeko - umonakalo owonayo. Ngokuqinisekileyo, kwaye uzala, uze utshate, kwaye nangaphezulu-unako ukuthuthela kwesinye isixeko. Kodwa kunjalo kubalulekile ukwenza oku, ube nezizathu ezifanelekileyo kunye nesiseko esiqinileyo - ukwazi ukuba kutheni wenze njalo kwaye uza kuzuza ntoni inzuzo.
Yiba nguwe, kodwa ungaqinisekisi ukuba unelungelo
Unokwenza lula kwaye uvele ubonise ukuzimela kwakho-ukuyeka umnqweno wokubonakalisa nokulwa. Iingcamango zakho zibaluleke kakhulu, kwaye ingongoma. Kuya kuwe ukuthatha uxanduva kwizenzo zakho. Kwaye ukuba ngaba abazali "bacinezela" - bathi, lixesha lokutshata, okanye u-Ivan Ivanych unesithuba esiphezulu saloo msebenzi - sishiye umsebenzi wakho ongenamsebenzi! - uza kufuneka uthi "cha" ngexesha. Ngaphandle kweenkcazo kunye nokuncenga - mhlawumbi ubuya kwiminyaka yakho eyi-15 uze uguqulwe ngabazali "Ewe, ubudala beenguqu!"
Ngokuqhelekileyo, inyaniso yokuba unokuzinceda akuyiyo ubungqina bokuzimela kunye nokukhula kwabazali. Ukuba uluvo lwabo lubalulekile kuwe, kodwa alukho lukhulu, ukuba uhlonipha isikhundla sabo, kodwa akukuthinteli ukujonga okokuqala - ndiyakuncoma. Oku, nangaphandle kokungquzulana, sele ucacise kubazali bakho ukuba ukhulile.