Kwaye thina, ngesizathu esithile, silindele ukuthembiswa, njengoko isaga esithi, iminyaka emithathu. Akukho konke into yokuba umntu akazalisekanga isithembiso sakhe ngokwemvelo okanye ngenjongo enobungozi.
Wathembise ukuba kubiza izolo ngentsasa, kodwa ngokuhlwa kusihlwa kwaye ifowuni ithe cwaka. Wathembisa ukunceda umama wakho ukulungiswa, athathe nawe ngeveki ukuthenga okanye uhambe nomntwana kwi-cartoon. Ewe, kodwa into engathembangayo, kunye nohambo ehlobo ephesheya, kunye nesilumko, kunye nantoni na into athembisa yona ukuba yiphumo elilodwa, akazange azalisekise isithembiso esinikwe sona. Kutheni wenza oku? Ngaba ufuna ukucaphukisa okanye ukulala egazini lamadoda? Wakwenza ngenxa yesizathu esifanayo sokuba uthembise umama wakho ebuntwaneni, ungabi nekhephu uze uhlambulule igumbi lakho, nje ukuba ushiywe emva.
Okanye mhlawumbi u libale? Akunjalo ngenxa yokuba intloko yakhe ivuza, kodwa imemori yakhe imele iqhube iziganeko kunye nezenzo ezingabalulekanga kuye. Ngesizathu esifanayo, udla ukulibala ukuzisa ifilimu kumntu osebenza naye othembise ukukhangela okanye ukubiza umnxeba ixesha elide ukuthetha. Iimeko ezingabalulekanga ngokukhethekileyo kwaye zixabiseke, imemori "iyakuthintela emva".
Ukungaphumeleli ukuzalisekisa izithembiso akufaneli nomntu osecaleni elibi. Kwaye akuthethi ukuba akayikuthenjwa nonke. Ukuba akazange azalisekise isithembiso sakhe sokukuthatha kwindawo yokutyela, oko akuthethi ukuba akayi kuzalisekisa isithembiso sakhe sokutshata nawe.
Ukuba umntu ngamanye amaxesha unikeza izithembiso, ezingenjalo, ngenxa yezinye iimeko ezibalulekileyo okanye ezinye iimeko, akukho nto iyakhathazeka ngayo. Enye into, ukuba uphosa amagama emoyeni waba yingxenye yomkhwa wakhe, waba ngumntu wesibini. Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukulwa nale nto nendlela yokufumana umntu ukugcina izithembiso zakhe?
Ungazama iindlela eziliqela zokusebenza kwi-wordless. Into elula kukuba uchaze isimo sakho sengqondo kwizithembiso zakhe ezingazaliseki. Sitshele indlela okukucaphukisa ngayo, kubaluleke kangakanani ukuba ukwazi ukuba ngokunikela isithembiso, kuya kuzalisekisa. Umntu othanda nokunyamekela makawuphulaphule aze awuthathe ngokufutshane. Nangona, enye ingathembisa nje ukwenza njalo.
Ndikhumbuze ukuba kungcono ukunqanda izithembiso ngokupheleleyo kunokuba waziwa ungumqambimanga kunye nomkhohlisi.
Ungasebenzisa indlela ebizwa ngokuba "isibuko". Oko kukuthi, kwezinye iimeko, yenza okufanayo, akwenzi ukuzalisekisa isithembiso. Umzekelo: mthembise isidlo sesithandana esilandelayo ngokulandela ngokukhawuleza kwaye ungalandeli. Okanye, njengokuba kunjalo, ukhohlwa ngephutha ukuzalisekisa isicelo sakhe. Menze azive ukuba akunakunceda ukujongana nezinto ezingagcwalisi izithembiso zakhe.
Unako, ngokuqinisekileyo, umele umphefumlo wakho kwaye ufuna ukuba uzalisekise konke othembisa. Kodwa le ndlela ayifuni isebenze. Amadoda aphelisa kuphela aze aphephe ukugxininiswa kwento ethile.
Kwaye kaninzi kangakanani sicinga malunga nokuba ilizwi lomntu liyithembiso. Xa emva kwesidlo sakusihlwa, ucebisa ukuba ngandlela-thile uye kwindawo yokutyela ukuze akugcine ekuphekeni. Okanye xa umbuzo wakho uthi: "Ukundwendwela, uya kundithenga ingubo yoboya?" Uyaphendula: "Mhlobo wam, ndiza kuzicingela." Kwiimeko ezinjalo, abafazi bayakuqonda oku njengesithembiso, kodwa indoda ayikho.
Ewe, kuninzi kuxhomekeka kwisithembiso esasinikwe ngumntu. Ukuba uthe wenyamekela wathi uya kukuphatha ubomi bakhe ezandleni zakhe aze azalise iintyatyambo. Akunakwenzeka ukuba uya kuba nomfanekiso apho umntu omdala ongeyiphuphulo ezama ukukukhetha okanye asebenzise yonke ipensheni kwi-bouquet yakho. Kwaye ukuba uthembisa ukuyeka ukutshaya nokungena kwimidlalo, kulungile yini ukuba ufune ukuzaliseka kwesithembiso kuye? Kule meko, wonke umntu unelungelo lemikhwa yawo, wonke umntu unoxanduva lwempilo yakhe. Enye into yokuba imikhwa emibi iye yaba nesifo, umzekelo, utywala, kwaye ufuna ukuyilahla, kodwa ayikwazi ukuyenza yedwa. Emva koko ngaphandle koluncedo lwakho kunye noncedo lwenzululwazi, akakwazi ukwenza.
Musa ukumbiza ngokuba ngumqambimanga kunye nomkhohlisi, uzama ukumenza azive enetyala. Cinga ngako, mhlawumbi ucela kakhulu kuye, ukunyanzelisa ukuba wenze izithembiso ezingapheliyo?
Ukuba umntu akazange abonakale ekunikeleni izithembiso ezingenanto, oku akufanele kukukholise ngokukhethekileyo kuwe. Mhlawumbi indoda yakho iyahlula kwikhekhe ukugcina igama. Ukuxhatshazwa okunjalo kubonisa abantu abangakhuselekanga kakhulu. Ukuzalisekisa abo bathenjisiweyo, bazaliswe ngokuzithemba, nto leyo abayiyo. Abantu abanjalo bahlala bebuhlungu ngokungahambiyo. Kwaye inqaku elithi "ngandlela-thile ifowuni", ephoswe nguwe, inokubangela ukuba umntu angayinxalenye kunye nomnxeba ngomnxeba, elinde umnxeba wakho.
Ukuxazulula umbuzo wendlela yokwenza umntu agcine izithembiso zakhe, Akunjalo na ukuba ungabhekiseli kumlingo, ungakhange ukhangele iqhinga kunye nemigangatho. Musa ukuthetha nabaphangi kunye nabathakathi. Kuhlala kubonakala ukuba le nto ingakujika njani. Ungabeki njengenjongo yakho yokubamba indoda ekubeni ayizange izalisekise isithembiso. Oku kunokuba yinto yokucaphukisa kwaye kuholele ekuxabaneni.
Cinga, kusenokuba ubulumko ukuba ungabi nokholo kuwo onke amazwi awawuthethayo? Kwaye ukuba mhlawumbi uthembise ukuthenga i-ringlet okanye into enhle, ungalindelanga oku kuye. Musa ukubheka i-dreary glance kwiifestile, ukuphazamiseka kwemizwa yakho. Ukuba akafuni, akayi kuthenga. Kodwa, xa ungalindelanga, kodwa ufumana, uvuyo lwesipho luya kumaxesha amaninzi.
Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba xa uzama ukufumana umntu ukuzalisekisa izithembiso zakhe, kufuneka ugcine izithembiso zakho ngokwakho. Ukuthintela umdlalo kwesango elinye. Naliphi na indlela olwa nazo izithembiso ezingapheliyo zabantu, into eyona nto ayiyikuyidlula ukuze umzabalazo ungaphenduli ngokwalo. Emva koko, into ephambili kukuba ubudlelwane obuhambelana nabantu abathandekayo babini.