Makhe sibone ukuba yiziphi iimeko ezifanele zenze xa umfana engayigcinanga ifowuni. Ewe, isizathu sokuqala sokuba umfana angayigcini iifowuni ingxabano. Kwenzeka ukuba loo nto inomsindo intombazana kwaye ayifuni ukuthetha naye. Ewe, le ndlela yokuziphatha ayiyikuvuyisa intokazi, njengoko ikwazi ukuza nezizathu ezininzi ezahlukileyo kuye, ukuba isigqibo sokuba le ndoda ayimthandi, kwaye ngoko ayiphenduli.
Enyanisweni, akunjalo nantoni na ukuba intombazana eyoyikisayo, inomdla. Ukuba loo mfana akazange amxelele ukuba ufuna ukuhamba, kodwa akayi kuthatha ifowuni, ngoko ufuna ixesha lokuzola, okanye uziphatha ukuze intombazana ifunde kule sifundo kwaye ayizange iphinde iphindwe. Ngoko ke, ukuba ubona ukuba umfana akaphenduli iifowuni, akudingeki ukuba wenze amahlazo, ngaphandle kokumisa ukukhala nokuziqhayisa. Kungcono ukucinga malunga nento oyenzile ngayo kwaye kutheni umthandi wakho enomsindo wakho. Ukuba unecala lokumangalela, akufanele ubize kwaye ubhale, ucele ukuba kungani ethukuthele. Usuyazi yonke into. Khumbula oku kwaye ungaphindi impazamo, kwaye xa uxolelanisa, musa ukuphakamisa isihloko sengxabano ukuba akafuni ukuthetha ngawo. Kwakhona, ukuba ubona ukuba loo mntu akafuni ukuphendula iifowuni, musa ukulibetha kabini ngosuku. Makhe ahlalise aze aphumle. Makhe ahambe esincinci. Kungathatha iiveki, okanye ezimbini. Kodwa, ukuba akafuni ukuhlukana nobudlelwane, ngoko awuyi kuxelwa ukuba yonke into iphelile phakathi kwakho. Ngoko ke, ukuba uthetha nje - awunaso isizathu sokukhathazeka. Kodwa ke, kuyacaca ukuba unzima kakhulu. Ngoko ke, ungambiza ngelinye ilanga. Ungathandabuzeki, xa ezi zibizayo usenokufumana impendulo. Into ephambili akuyikuyidlulela kwaye ungayikuzibophelela ekuziphatheni.
Kutheni kusenokuba umntu osemncinini akakwazi ukuphendula iifowuni? Ngoko kwenzeka nangona loo mntu efuna ukungabonakali. Wonke umntu uyazi ukuba kukho izethulo kwaye zikhona. Ukukhupha rhoqo kususa iimvakalelo kwabanye kunye nokubona konke kunye nabantu abasondeleyo. Izaziso ziyahluke. Bavalelwe ngokwabo, bahlala ekhaya, abanxibelelwano nabani na, bafunda iincwadi, balalele umculo kwaye bazame ukusinda zabo iingxaki. Ukuba umfana wakho unolu hlobo, akukho nto engaqhelekanga kuba akaphenduli ifowuni. Lo mqathango kufuneka uqondwe kwaye wamukelwe. Ngokuqinisekileyo, akuyithandeki xa umntu othandekayo elala ngaphandle kwesixwayiso. Ngako oko, ngezinye izihlandlo, unokuthetha naye kwaye umcele ukuba anikezele nje xa efuna ukwenza njalo. Ngokomzekelo, yithetha into efana nale: "Andifuni ukuthetha nabani na iintsuku ezimbalwa, ndiyaxolisa, xa konke kulungile, ndiza kubiza." Kodwa, nangona akafuni okanye ayikhohlwa ukuthetha okunje, musa ukucaphukisa uze uthukuthele nomfana wakho. Uyamthanda, ngoko ke umele wamkele njengoko enjalo. Ekugqibeleni, umfana akayikuthuka okanye kukuhlazisa. Inyaniso yokuba akayi kukuhlawula ingqalelo kwixesha elithile lobomi bakhe lixabiso lokuziphatha kwakhe kunye nesimo sengqondo. Funda ukuba ungayithobeli. Kwaye awunakuze ubeke iliso kumntu wale migaqo kwaye ufumane iifowuni ezingapheliyo. Ngale ndlela awuyi kumnceda kwaye awuyi kubonakalisa nantoni na, kodwa uya kuphelelwa ngumsindo. Uyaqaphela ngokugqithiseleyo ukukuphatha njengotshaba oluphanga ubomi bakhe kwaye lusususe kwi-balance balance emoyeni yakhe, ebenzima kunzima kuye ukufumana kule nto okanye kuloo meko. Ngoko ke, zama ukuvimbela iimvakalelo zakho neemvakalelo zakho. Khumbula ukuba ukuthula kwakhe akuhambelani nesimo sakhe sengqondo kuwe. Umfana uyakuthanda kakhulu. Kalula, ngeli thuba kufuneka ahlale yedwa kunye naye, ngoko uyayigcina. Khumbula ukuba ama-introverts kufuneka aphinde acingisise ngengxaki yodwa, fumana isisombululo, uqonde indlela yokusinda, ukuba akukho sisombululo, usaphila, kwaye emva kokuba ubuyele kubantu. Ngoko ke, zama ukunyanga ukuba umntu osemtsha uyalala kwindawo ethile kwaye akakunaki ukuqonda. Musa ukuqulunqa izinto ezingenangqondo, cinga ukuba unkosikazi wakhe kunye nokunye okunjalo, ngoko ke uyayigatya. Ngentliziyo, uyazi ukuba usekhaya, ufunda incwadi yakhe ayithandayo kunye nokuphumla kwihlabathi lonke ukufumana uxolo lwengqondo.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, abafana abanako ukuthatha izibatho ngezizathu ezininzi ezahlukeneyo. Kukho oomama abanenkxalabo ukuba umfana akaphendulanga umnxeba kwaye akazange abuyele emva kwemizuzu emihlanu. Kwimeko apho, ungazakheli ingxaki. Inokwenzeka ukuba, uxakekile emsebenzini kwaye akakwazi ukuphendula okanye ukuhamba kwibhasi ebanzi kwaye akakwazi ukufikelela kwifowuni. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, loo nto intombazana inokwenkqisa yonke into kwaye ibone into engekho ngokwenene, kwaye iqala ukwenza izinto eziyinqatha. Yile ndlela umona wesifazane kunye nombono wobunini obonakalayo, kwaye oku akuwona umgangatho omhle nhlobo. Ngeemvakalelo ezinjalo kufuneka ufunde ukulwa, kuba abantu abayithandi xa behlala bekhankanywa into ethile.
Kodwa, kukho esinye esinye isizathu sokuba umntu angathathi ifowuni. Akafuni nje ukuthetha nentombazana, kodwa unentloni okanye akanakuzixhamla ukumxelela ngaye. Ngoko akayi kuthatha ifowuni, enethemba lokuba uyayeka ukukhala. Kodwa, ukuba yonke into eyenzeka ngale ndlela, intombazana ngokwayo kufuneka ive ukuba kutheni indoda iziphatha ngendlela. Ungazikhohlisi, zigwebe kwaye zifike ngezizathu ezithile. Ukuba loo mfana wayeke anomdla kuwe okanye ungenalo nhlobo kuye, musa ukumbiza, jonga iintlanganiso uze wenze konke ukudibanisa. Musa ukuzihlazisa. Kungcono ukuqala ukuthetha nomntu oza kubiza iifowuni zakho.