Ngoko, ngubani abo bacinga ukuba: Ndiyamthanda intombazana, kwaye uya kuthandana nomnye. Kwimeko enje, xa "ndiyamthanda" - ukuzisa intlungu, kulula ukuyiqonda, ukuqonda iimvakalelo. Mhlawumbi, sizathu sokuba sizame ukuthetha egameni lomfana othanda. Intombazana yakhe ethandekayo yathathwa yenye. Hayi ngamandla, kodwa ngeemvakalelo. Kwaye ngenxa yalomnye, uzama ukufihla imizwa. Kodwa, emva koko, uthi "Ndiyamthanda" ngokunyanisekileyo nangokunyaniseka. Nguye olungele ukuphakamisa le ntombazana ezulwini. Kutheni ethanda omnye kwaye luyintando yokwenene. Kwaye kubaluleke kakhulu, njani ukunqoba lo mnye?
Ewe, makhe sicinge imeko kwaye mamele umfana. Eli bali liba ngumzekelo weemeko apho umntu, xa edibana nomfazi, ufuna ukufumana ulwalamano olunzulu. Ngoko ke, abantu abafuna nje ukufumana intombazana ngexesha elithile, imibuzo enjalo kunye nezisombululo zabo aziyi kusebenza. Le meko iboniswa ngabo babona intsingiselo yobomi kumntu othandekayo.
Ngoko, makhe siqale. Ndadibana nale ntombazana, ndingacingi ukuba uya kuthatha indawo ebomini bam. Wayemhle nje, ulungile kwaye uhlekisayo. Ukususela ekuqaleni ndayazi ukuba wayethandana nomnye kwaye xa bexabana, ndabuhlungu ngokwenene. Kodwa ke, emva kwexesha, ndaqonda ukuba andinomdla kuphela. Ixesha lidlulileyo kwaye yonke into ishintshile. Ndandicinga ukuba ubuhlobo bethu bukhula bube nobubele, uze ubenothando. Ndazi ukuba kwakungalunganga, ngoko ndandithula ngento endiyiphuphayo kunye noko ndikufunayo.
Kodwa, ngandlela-thile, ndaqonda ukuba, naye, ufumana into kum. Isazela nje asimvumeli ukuba abonise iimvakalelo zakhe. Uyakuthanda oko, omnye, kodwa naye uvakalelwa ngothando lwam. Oku ndaziqonda emva kokuvuma kwam iimvakalelo zakhe. Ndiyaqonda ukuba andinalo ilungelo lokumphoqa ukuba enze nantoni na. Ndihlala ndizama ukuzibamba, kuba ndiqonda ukuba uloyiko ukukhawuleza nokuphanga yonke into. Kwaye kunye nam. Naye. Kodwa ndiyaqonda kwakhona ukuba andinakukuma ngonaphakade. Kanye, mhlawumbi, mna, mhlawumbi ndingayifuni, yifake phambi kokukhethwa. Kwaye andifuni ukuba ahlupheke. Kodwa mna a ndifuni ukuhlupheka. Ngoko ke, ke, andikuthandi ukuya kumanyathelo alolo hlobo. Kodwa, ngakolunye uhlangothi, unxantathu onothando awunakukhokelela kuyo nayiphi na into enhle. Ngoko ke, ndijonge indlela endijonga ngayo, indlela aziva ngayo, indlela afuna ukuhlala ngayo, ndidla ngokuzibuza ukuba uyamthanda kangakanani. Yaye ukuba uyayithanda, ngoko kutheni eze kum? Andifuni ukuphazamisa ubudlelwane naye, kodwa ngelo xesha, ndifuna ukufezekisa, andiyiqondi indlela yokwenza ngcono. Yingakho ndifuna kakhulu ukwazi ukuba yintoni enokuyenza kwiimeko ezinje, kwaye, ngokubaluleke kakhulu, nokuba ukulindela ukuba uya kuhlala esithandana kwaye undikhethe. Yiya, kufuneka uzame ukumlibala, zama ukuba ngumhlobo omhle kwaye ungalokothi ukhange iindlela zokuba ngumntu oza kuchitha ubomi bakhe.
Eli li bali. Kufuneka kuqatshelwe ukuba kuyinyani, kwaye kungekhona kuphela kule nsizwa oku kwenzekayo. Kukho abaninzi abantu abawela kwiimeko ezinjalo kwaye bazama ngokunyanisekileyo ukuzisombulula ngokuchanekileyo. Le yinkalo nje kukuba akuyiyo yonke into efunyenweyo. Yintoni onokuyithetha kumfana onjalo kunye nendlela yokuziphatha ngakumbi.
Okokuqala, kufuneka kuthiwa unethamsanqa xa ebona ukuba akayithandanga ntombazana. Kungaba nzima xa engaboni na madoda. Kwaye ukuba akafuni ukuthatha inyathelo elingakumbi ngenxa yokuba unembeza wakhe ungamvumeli, ngoko sele sele ecinga kakhulu malunga noko kufuneka akhale khona. Kwiimeko ezinjalo kuyimfuneko ukuba uvuyo lokuba intombi yesentliziyo ivakalelwa ngokucacileyo kungekhona imvakalelo enobubele. Ngoko, unenalo ithuba, kufuneka usebenze ngokuchanekileyo.
Ngoko, yiyiphi into enokuthi ikwacetyiswa? Okokuqala, kwezinye iimeko kungcono ukuhlala ungenzi lutho. Umzekelo, ungabonakali umnqweno wale ntombazana. Ukuba uziva ngenxa yeemvakalelo zakhe, uya kuba nolona ngakumbi xa umfana ezama ukuveza iimvakalelo zakhe ngendlela ebonakalayo. Yingakho akufanele uzame ukumbamba kunye nokumanga le ntokazi. Kufuneka enze le nyathelo. Yinto xa intombazana ikhetha ukwenza into enjalo, inene, ukhetho lwakhe luya kwenziwa. Ngomnye ubanga iimvakalelo zakhe ziya kubonakala kwaye, mhlawumbi, emva koko uya kumshiya omnye umntu aze eze kule nsizwa. Abafazi abanjalo abazi ukuba baxoke njani, ngoko olu khetho luthi kuphela sele sele egqibe ukuba ngubani ofuna ukuba naye.
Yintoni enye ongayilumkisa kule meko? Mhlawumbi, musa ukulibala ukuba umntu ngamnye unesiphene sakhe. Yingakho ukuba umfana ebona ukuba omnye wenza into leyo intombazana ayithandi, ungazama ukuzibonakalisa ngokusesikweni sakhe ekukhanyeni okuhle. Musa nje ukunyuka "esikhumbeni" uze uzame ukubonisa ukuba umfana wakhe ulungile. Ngokuqhelekileyo, akudingeki ukuba uthethe kakubi malunga nalo, njengoko intombazana inokuvusa ukuvakalelwa, kwaye iya kuqala ukukhusela. Kwaye akuyimfuneko. Ngokulula, kubalulekile ukubonisa amacala akho angcono, angasetyenziswa ngokuchasene neempawu ezimbi zomnye umntu. Isebenza kwabasetyhini kwaye, ngokuqonda okanye engayiqondi, iya kuqonda ukuba le nsizwa iyona nto ibhetele. Enye imantombazana inzima ngokwenene ukukhetha, kuba umntu sele esetyenzisiwe kumntu, kwaye umntu othile waqhekeka ngokungazelelwe ebomini bakhe. Kodwa, ukuba wenza ngokuchanekileyo kwaye ungagqithisi izinto, unokwenza ukuba ukhethe umntu oye wambona ukuba uyamthanda kwaye wathanda ukwenza konke ukuze nje ube kunye. Kufuneka nje ube ngumkhonto wakhe, ongayizibophelela, kodwa, nangona kunjalo, ibonakala ngokufanelekileyo xa kuyimfuneko.