Ekugqibeleni kwenzeka: wadibana nendoda yamaphupha akho! Ufana nje nowe wafika kuwe ngamaphupha kunye nento owacingayo ngayo yonke imihla. Uziva uzilungele kunye kunye, kangangokuba ngamanye amaxesha uyatshisa: kuthekani ukuba olu lonwabo luphela? Kodwa ekuhambeni kwexesha, uqala ukuqaphela ukuba abantu abasondeleyo kuwe, nokuba ngabahlobo okanye izihlobo, abavumelaniyo nokukhetha kwakho. Bathi kanzima: "Akayena isibini kuwe" - kwaye yile nto! Kwaye nangona kunjalo ukuba uyakuthanda kakhulu. Kwaye ingcamango ingena kuyo: "Ngaba indoda yam ilungele ulwalamano olunzulu?"
Ucinga ukuba umfazi uvakalelwa njani xa ethandana nesoka lakhe, xa eva kumama wakhe nsuku zonke: "Yintoni oyifumene kuye!" Okanye kumhlobo: "Akunakufanelanga nonke!" ? Vumelana ukuba, mhlawumbi, udidekile kwaye uyabuhlungu. Ngenxa yokuba nje wamfumana wakhetha ukuba abe nolwalamano oluqinileyo, kwaye, ngokombono wakhe, unobuncinane.
Enyanisweni, ekuqaleni, umfazi onoyolo, ophefumlelweyo nophefumlelweyo, akanako ukuxhomekeka kubaluleke kula mazwi. Ngokuphambene noko, naye ufuna ukwabelana ngesimo sengqondo kunye nabantu abasondeleyo - emva koko, kuba umntu oqhelekileyo unqwenela ukuphazamisa iimvakalelo ezintle, xelela ngehlabathi lonke. Njengoko, ukhona-indoda yam! Kwaye kwenzeka ntoni ngenxa yoko? Kuya kuba yinto yokulala.
Umzekelo, uza kunye nekhenkwe yakhe kwiphathi, ekhanya ngokuvuya kunye nekratshi, ukuba unendoda enhle kakhulu, ezonwabisa kwaye evuyisa ekhaya. Ngomso ubiza, umhlobo kunye nokupholisa komntu onamava oqalayo ukuqala ukutshatyalalisa umhlobo wakhe. Wathetha kakhulu ngelizwi elityebileyo etafileni malunga neengozi zezilwanyana ezinobuncwane kwaye wayekhangeleka njenge-idiot epheleleyo, enqaba kwesi sizathu esivela kwisaladi yemifuno entsha. Oko kwakungekho nto engathandabuzekiyo kwimpikiswano phakathi komncedisi kunye nomyeni wakhe, nangona wayengenayo ingcamango engapheliyo yenkcazo yengxoxo kunye nokunyeliseka xa echazwe ngayo. Kwaye njalo, njalo njalo ...
UWilly-nilly, umfazi ohluphekileyo uqala ukukhumbula ukuba yiyiphi inqabileyo kunye namazwi okuthungela aphonswa ngabahlobo bakhe basendulo ngokubhekiselele kwi-chevalier esanda kuzalwa, kwaye uyaba nexhala. Uqala ukuqonda ukuba ubanjwe phakathi kwemililo emibili, kwaye le mvakalelo, uya kuvuma, ayiyi kubangela ukuzithemba kwakhe. Ngokuqinisekileyo, ungadlula ngaphaya kweendlebe zechungechunge lokugxeka okungathandekiyo komntu othandekayo, kodwa kungekhona umntu onako. Ukongeza, sonke siyazixabisa uluvo lwabahlobo bethu kwaye sizama ukumamela xa kunokwenzeka.
Ngendlela, uzama ukuphinda upapasho ngokukhanya kwithemba lokutshintsha uluvo lwabahlobo alukho nto efanelekileyo. Abafumananga ukufumana iziphoso ezintsha kwiindawo eziziwayo, eziba ngakumbi, ngokuqhelekileyo uyimngenisa kwinkampani yakho yangaphambili. Ukuphuhliswa okufanayo kweziganeko kudla ukudibana kwaye apho, endaweni yeentombi, indima yokugxekwa idlala ngumama. Xa uqala ukugxeka umthandi wakho zonke izono ezifayo, akabonakali ukuyeka. Ngoko ke ungubani na ukuba uphulaphule: abantu abasondele kuwe, ngubani, ngokwenene, unqwenela kakuhle, okanye ilizwi lentliziyo yakho? Akukho mpendulo engaqondakaliyo kulo mbuzo, izazi zengqondo zithi. Kwaye nangona kuya kufuneka wenze ukhetho olunzima, kwaye nguwe kuphela, ungawunaki ucebisi lweengcali. Emva koko, bancedisa abantu abaninzi ukuba bahambe kwindawo enzima yobomi.
MOMMA UZIWAZI?
Uninzi unina, njengoko uyazi, unqwenela ukuba iintombi zabo zivelele ubomi bentsapho. Kwaye kuxhomekeke kwiindlela ezininzi-kwaye oku kunzima ukuphikisana-ngendlela intombi eya kwenza ngayo ukhetho lwakhe. Kodwa kuphela igama "abaphumelelayo" oomama kunye nabantwana babo bahlala bephathwa ngokuhlukileyo. Abazali bafuna umntwana wabo othandekayo ukuba athole indoda ngeendlela zonke: a) efanelekileyo; b) olunzulu; c) umntu okhuselekile. Yiloo nto abayalela ngayo isidlo esiyinkimbinkimbi - kwaye akukho sitya esingaphantsi. Amava abonisa ukuba ngokungabikho kweyodwa yeemfuno ezintathu, oomama abavumelani ukuba baxolelane.
Ngoko ke, xa uthanda indoda "engafanelekanga" kumbono wam umfazi, uqala "ukubhoboza ubununu bakho," kunye neenjongo ezilungileyo. Kanti uyenzi ngamanye amaxesha ngokucokisekileyo kangangokuthi khumbula ukuba uMnumzane Kashpirovsky unesipho sakhe sokusikisela nje kuphela ngaphambi kokulawula kwakhe.
Kodwa ngelo xesha, unina onothando, ngelanga, akwazi ukuba ukhangela iimpawu ezahlukileyo kumntu wakhothethiweyo. Ngokomzekelo, uyabona ukuba ngokunyamezela kwakhe ekufezekiseni injongo, ngokukhawuleza uza kufumana isikhundla esiphambili, nangona le nto ayikwazi ukuziqhayisa. Okanye uthanda ukunyamekela ngothando, ubuncwane bakhe boqoqosho, unxano lwakhe lobuhlobo obunzulu, obungenakuhlala unomdla kunye nengqiqo. Ewe, zimbalwa iimpawu ezisishukumisela ukuba sihlale sivuya, kuba wonke umntu unalo. Ingobubele nje ukuba umama "ungumnikazi" wenziwa kulo mzekelo, intombazana iyasebenza kwaye ngamanye amaxesha unobundlobongela.
Kwaye ekubeni kufikelela kuwe ukuba wenze isigqibo, njengangaphambili, kufuneka uzame ukuziphendulela kumbuzo wendlela ohlola ngayo iimpawu zomntu ozikhethileyo. Kwaye ukuba uqinisekile ukuba akanalo uphawu olubi kunye nokuba lo mntu ufanelwe uthando lwakho, ukuba awunaso isikrokreko ukuba unokugula naye okwesibini, yima ngokuzeleyo. Ungesabi ngamazwi omama wakho, "Okanye yena, okanye mna!" Ukuze uphendule "Yena", yeyona nto ibuhlungu ngayo imeko. Amava abonisa ukuba ukuba wenze ukhetho olumkileyo, kwaye kungekhona njengombhikisho (oku akufanele kwenziwe nakweyiphi na imeko!), Ekugqibeleni yonke into iya kutshintsha ibe ngcono.
Yaye unako umama wakho athukuthele xa umbiza ngomhla womtshato wakhe, kwaye kweso siganeko sigqoke ingubo emnyama kwaye siya kusula ngokukhawuleza iinyembezi. Ukuba ubomi bakho bentsapho buya kuhamba kakuhle, ukuba unyoko uyaqonda ukuba emva kweminyaka embalwa wena nomyeni wakho niyavuya kwaye nonwabile omnye nomnye, uya kulahleka, qi niseka. Kwaye asikucebisi ukuba uqhubeke nombambano kunye nonyoko okanye ufihlile isono sakhe eside. Ungakulibala ukuba unqwenela ngokunyanisekileyo, waza waguquka ngokunyanisekileyo.
LUVULE LINGUISTICS
Kwabazali kubonakala ukuba yonke into icacile. Bazama ukubonelela iintombi zabo ngokuzinzileyo, ubomi obucebileyo, kwaye ngumtshato ophumelelayo obonakala ngathi unesiqinisekiso sokonwaba. Kodwa i intombi azixhalabele malunga necebo lakho lokubamba iqela elisebenzayo kulo mbandela. Emva koko akucaci ukuba kutheni ngamanye amaxesha kuthatyathwa ukugxeka ngokunyanisekileyo ukhetho lwakho?
Emva koko, uya kuvuma - kukulula kunoma ubani, njengomhlobo osondeleyo, ukukuqonda, oontanga! Esikhundleni salokho, uzama, xa unamathuba onke, ukuba ahlasele i-knight yakho-nokuba ngaba "umdlalo" wokuzilibazisa, ngokubhekiselele ekuqokeleleni amaleyibhile omdlalo, okanye ngokubhekiselele kumtya wakhe omtsha, ebiza ngokuba "Ukukhala kwenkomo ebomvu ebusuku jungle. " Ewe, ukuba ufumanisa ukuba ufunde u-Anna Karenina ngenyanga yesithathu, uya kuqonda ngokucacileyo ukuba uTolstoy wabhala incwadana ngokukhawuleza kunokuba ayifunde.
Uhla, njengoko uyaziyo, ugaya ilitye. Kungenzeka ukuba amazwi abalulekileyo aya kwenza "ishishini" labo, kwaye ngokuhamba kwesikhathi uya kuqala ukungathandabuzeki: "Ngaba indoda yam iyafaneleka kum? .." Ukongeza, abaninzi abafazi bathanda ukuthatha isenzo ngombono womhlobo. Yaye ukuba ithe indoda ingamkelekanga, ngoko kuthetha, ukusuka ngaphandle, ngokukhawuleza yatshatyalaliswa ngokupheleleyo, nangona intliziyo yowesifazane ibhikisana nayo.
Ngokutsho kweengcali zeengqondo, le ndlela yokuziphatha yabamantombazana ibangelwa ngumona ongenalo. Oku kuphela akuthethi ukuba, naye, uyamthanda nekwenkwenkwe yakho kwaye ngoko unomona kuwe njengengxabano (nangona oku kwenzekayo). Ngokuqhelekileyo iintombi zibuhlungu ngenxa yokuba iqhelana lakho elitsha liye lithatha ixesha lakho lokukhulula kwaye ngenxa yoko uye wahamba nabahlobo bakho bokuqala. Enye intombi intloko engcazi ukuba indlela yakho yokucinga, eyaziwayo kuye, ingatshintsha phantsi kwefuthe lomthandi wakho, kwaye ngoko unokuba neengxaki zokuqonda.
Akunjalo wonke umhlobo ovuyiswayo nomoya wokuzithemba ukuba uqala ukukhawuleza njengomfazi onothando. Mhlawumbi, ngobudlelwane bakho, wayedlala indima yokuba ngumsizi kunye nomncedisi ongenakuxhaswa, kwaye ngezinye iinkqubela wavakalelwa kukuba awusayikufuna le nto. Kwaye omnye wabahlobo bakhe wayenakuvuyela igunya lakhe eliphezulu emehlweni akho ngaphambili, kwaye kunzima kuye ukuba yamkele ukuba ngoku uphatha umlenze osandul 'ukuzalwa ngenhlonipho enkulu.
Kodwa musa ukukhawuleza ukugweba intombi ebalulekileyo. Zama ukuyiqonda, kwaye ngenxa yale nto uzibeke endaweni yayo. Abantu abaninzi banomuzwa ongenakudla ngokuqhelekileyo, xa ubuhlobo obude kunye obuzinzileyo buxhaswa ngumntu wesithathu. Emva kwakho konke, umona luyintsi ephezulu yolwalamano oluqinileyo, kwaye ukuhlangabezana nalo akusoloko kulula. Ngoko ukuba wena kunye neqabane lakho nithembele kwiimvakalelo kunye neenjongo ezinzulu, zama ukungayithobeli ingqalelo yeentetho zentombazana kwaye musa ukumphendula ngezwi elifanayo. Ngokukodwa ukususela ngoku uyazi ukuba ukuba ngumntu wakho othandekayo akanalo nantoni na.
Ngendlela, amaqabane amantombazana, ukuba ayinyani, atshintshe ixesha lokujonga uluvo lwabo ngokubhetele. Njengokuba kunjalo kumama, oku kwenzeka xa bebona ukuba uhlala ngokuzonwabisa kwaye uza kuhlala ngale ndlela ixesha elide. Ewe, akazange akwazi ukukuphumelela - unokwenza ntoni! Kufuneka sibeke oku.
UTHANDO LWENKONZO
Kuthekani ukuba omnye okanye ngabahlobo ababini okanye umama ongatshatanga ugxeke umthandi wakho, wena, ndiyathemba, sele sele icacile. Kodwa kunokwenzeka kwaye inguqu yesithathu yokuphuhliswa kweemeko-xa zijikeleze, njengokungathi ngesivumelwano, zithetha kuphela umntu okhethiweyo. Kwaye nabahlobo, kunye noogxa, kunye nezihlobo - konke ngokucacileyo "bamnisela ngodaka." Nanku nje kufuneka uphulaphule uluvo loluntu kwaye ucinge kanzima.
Emva kwakho konke, uthando, njengoko uyaziyo, unomkhuba wokuba yimfama. Ngoko, abanye abantu babone okokufihlakeleyo kumbono wakho onothando. Ngoko ke, kufuneka ukuba ufike ngokukhawuleza kwaye uziphathe kakuhle kwaye, ukuba kunokwenzeka, uhlalutyo lwenjongo yobuntu bakho kunye nolwalamano lwakho luphela. Khumbula zonke iimpawu ezinzima ukuzenza abantu abasondelene nawe, bambone ukuba zide kangakanani ukusuka kwinyani. Yilungiselele ukuba uya kufumana ngokukhawuleza iinyaniso eziphantsi.
Ngoko xa uxelelwa ukuba umkhonto wakho unesilumko, unqabile, njengentambo yekwindla, okanye unqatshelwe nayiphi na inqweno yobugcisa, zibuze: "Ngaba uyandifuna ngokwenene, ngaba iyangifanele - indoda yam ayinayo ngokwaneleyo ubudlelwane obukhulu oko kunye noko ... "Ngokuqhelekileyo, zama ukucima iiglasi zepinki. Ngokukodwa xa kukukhathazeka ngandlela-thile ngaphambili, kodwa waguquka amehlo. Musa ukuqalisa umdlalo oshushu womdlalo onobungozi othiwa "simelene nomntu wonke" ngenxa yeemvakalelo eziphakamileyo. Mamela xa ubizwa ukuba ucinge malunga nangengqondo yakhe engaqinisekanga, ukuba utshintshile imisebenzi emithathu kwiinyanga ezintandathu zokugqibela okanye ukuba uyinto engummangaliso kwaye engcolileyo. Akunakwenzeka ukuba ukwazi ukuyibuyisela. Abasetyhini abaninzi bekhubeka kweli litye ngexesha lokuphila kwabo. Ukhawuleza uxhoma umthwalo onzima wokuzikhathalela ngokwakho-konke oko.
Cinga ngako, kodwa ngaba kukufanelekile ukuba uzibophe ngokuzenzekelayo kwi-isolation yendalo yonke ngenxa yolu thando lomntu? Kwaye kunjalo, unayo amandla okwaneleyo okutshabalalisa izinto eziyimfuneko, njengomoya, ubudlelwane kunye nezihlobo kunye nabahlobo kwaye uhlala kwihlabathi elakhelwe ngamanxuwa kuphela? Ngaba uya kuvuyela kwintengo enjalo, ingakumbi ukuba ukushisa kweentliziyo zakho kwehla kunye nexesha? Emva koko, kukho iimeko xa ibhinqa elenza ngokuchasene nesiluleko esilungileyo sezalamane, ngenxa yoko, sasihlala sodwa: iqabane alizange liphile ngokwethemba lakhe, kwaye iqhayiya lathintela ukuba izibophelelo zakudala ziphinde zivuselele izibophelelo zakudala. Ingaba oku kwenzeka kuwe okanye cha, kuxhomekeke kuwe kuphela. Into ephambili, ungayikhohlwa ukuba isigxina kwisigqibo esincomekayo sinokuqhutywa yintliziyo yakho kunye nengqondo yakho.