Nangona yonke into iyimfuneko, kukho ezinye izibonakaliso eziqhelekileyo: nokuba unelisekile ngegama lakho, ubudala, indlela ovuswa ngayo kusasa, ziphi iingcamango eziza engqondweni yakho, ngaba kukho abantu abanomdla wokuvala, uhlala kunye, unayo nayiphi na iminqweno. Ukuba umnqweno uyanyamalala - le sizathu sokuguqula into ethile kwi-100%.
Esinye isibonakaliso esibalulekileyo ebomini bomntu-isigaba esibalulekileyo - kukudandatheka. Esinye isazi saseJamani sanikela umfanekiso othakazelisayo wokudakumba ngendlela yowesifazane osekhulile owayeza, waya etafileni kwaye ufuna ukuthetha into ethile, kodwa ayathuli. Enyanisweni, ukunyamezeleka kungaphumi. Oku kusabela kwethu kwisimo sengqondo esingafanelekanga, izenzo, indlela yokuphila engaqhelekanga kuthi. Ukuba uphulaphule ukudakumba, qonda ukuba yintoni malunga nayo, ngoko kunokwenzeka ukutshintsha into ethile. Kodwa olu tshintsho kufuneka lube lunyame kakhulu kwaye luqaphele-ukuguqula ngokubanzi umsebenzi, ukushiya intsapho, ukulahla into encike kuyo, kweli lizwe akunakwenzeka.
Kufuneka uqonde kwaye uvelele iimpawu zobomi bomntu - ibakala elibalulekileyo - ukubona ukuba unani - kwisitoreji, uqeqesho, kumgca. Kamva, lo mntu unokuchaphazela ubomi bakho. Musa ukunikezela ngezibonelelo, uhambo. Esinye isibonakaliso esibalulekileyo sigulo. Ukuba umntu uhamba ngendlela engafanelekanga, akayi kuzalisekisa umsebenzi wakhe, ngokuqhelekileyo ufumana isifo - ukulungisa, unike ithuba lokucinga nokucinga kwakhona ngobomi bomntu ibakala elibalulekileyo.
Ngendlela, abantu baninzi badinga ukuba "bagule" okanye "bangene kwindawo ephawulekayo" ukuze "baqalise" - emva koko izinto eziza kuqala ziguqulwe. Umntu uyaqonda ukuba yonke imigaqo yakhe, ukwesaba, izimo zengqondo ziyintsipho kwaye lixesha lokutshintsha into ethile. Omnye isigulane sam sakwazi ukubuyela kumdlavuza ngokusebenzisa utshintsho, kodwa ngenxa yoko kwakufuneka athi: "Andiyi kwenza okungaphezu kweyodwa ngomzuzu wobomi oko andikufuniyo, kwaye andiyi kuhlala kuloo mhlobo endingafuniyo."
Kwaye wenza okuninzi-utshintshe imisebenzi, intsapho kwaye kungekudala waphulukiswa.
Yintoni enokuthintela utshintsho ebomini?
Utshaba olubi kakhulu alukholelwa kuye nakweyedwa. Ezi zitshilo zengqondo zibiza imikhosi yempango "iSabotage" ("akusikho ixesha okwangoku, ngoko kutheni utshintshe into") kunye ne "Pessimist" ("andisayi kufumana"). Abantu abathanda ukudlala bayacetyiswa ukuba bakhumbule isiqubulo senkampani ("Yenza nje!").
Ngokuqhelekileyo sinqandwa ngumnqweno wokuzinza kokuqala. Emva koko, ihlabathi elijikelezile litshintsha ngexesha elidlulayo, siyanyanzelekile ukuba sijonge njalo into entsha. Kwaye iqela elincinci labantu sele lifumene lo mgangatho, lugwala ukulahlekelwa yiyo. Omnye ukuyeka kukuba ukwesaba ukungena kwi-incra incognito, apho ungakafiki khona, kwaye kukho ukuba ungazi, ukuhlangabezana neemvakalelo ongazange uzikhange. Olunye utshintsho luhlala lubandakanya utshintsho lwenkqubo yonke. Uyabhikisana, ngenxa yokuba, sele eqalile ukutshintsha, unako ukunyuka kwimo yakhe yangaphambili. Ngoko umntu ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa yesazisi, ayeke ukuba ngokwakhe. Kutheni kunzima ukutshintsha imikhwa? Ngenxa yokuba ngaphandle kokutshaya (ngaphandle kwekhofi, ngaphandle komntu onzima), akusiyo ngokwenene. Ukuyeka ukutshaya, ukulahlekelwa ubunzima, umntu akayi kuba nasiphi isizathu. Uya kufuneka athathele uxanduva lobomi bakhe, asebenzise ezinye izihlobo, utshintshe imo.
Ungaqala njani ukutshintsha?
Ukuqhubeka kwinto entsha, ngelixa elidala lingagqitywanga, kunzima. Izimo ezingapheliyo zifana neefestile ezivulekileyo kwi-esweni ezingasetyenziswanga. Kwaye ivulekile ngakumbi, ikhompyutha ixhomekeke ngakumbi. Kuyafana nabantu - ezo zimo zithatha amandla - siqala "ukuxhoma." Ngoko ke, ukuba uthathe isidingo esitsha xa usenziwa ngakudala. Ngenxa yoko, umntu unokucinga ngeso lengqondo kwigumbi elingavumelekanga apho kugcinwa khona izifiso ezingagqibekanga, kwaye zifezekise kwakhona. Abo bafa bafanelekile ukuba bayeke. Abanye baseshushu, ungasebenzisana nawo, zama ukuqonda oko bakwenzayo. Olu phicotho luyakunceda ukuqonda okubalulekileyo kule nto. Ngamanye amaxesha ndiyalela abaxhasi kwiphepha lokuthabatha ubomi bomntu-ibakala elibalulekileyo kuze kube ngoku nakwixesha elizayo. Kwaye kwicandelo lexesha elizayo kubonisa oko ndifuna ukufumana ixesha lokuzifeza. Isinyathelo esilandelayo kukuba ube noxanduva lobomi bakho, uqonde kwaye wamukele ukuba ezinye iinguqu ziquka abanye. Emva koko, qala ukusebenza, kuba ubomi abuphelelanga. Ngoko ke, xa unqume ukwenza into, yenza. Emva kokuba unqume ukutshintsha, kufuneka uzibuze imibuzo emithathu:
Yintoni endiyidingayo kwaye ndinokutshintsha? Yintoni endifuna ukuyifumana? Ngayiphi indlela, yiyiphi inyathelo kunye nawuphi umhla?
Emva kokuba uphendule kubo, qhubela phambili ukudweba isicwangciso senkqubo uze ulandele ngokucacileyo. Xa iinjongo ichazwa ngexesha kunye nakwizenzo ezithile, sele sele ikhuthaza kwaye ikulawula, kungekhona wena. Kukho iindlela ezimbini ezichaseneyo zokuqonda utshintsho. Iyokuqala xa iphunyezwe kwizigaba. Vumelana, kunzima umntu ohleli edla indlovu enkulu. Kodwa oku akuthethi ukuba akufanele ubeke umsebenzi wokuwudla - nje ukuwutshaya yonke imihla, kwaye akuyi kubakho i-crumb yonyaka.
Kodwa akukho tshintsho olwenziweyo lwenziwa ngolu hlobo - akunakwenzeka ukuxhoma phezu kweli gaba ngamaxesha amabini. Ngoko ke, kufuneka ujonge kwaye ugxume ngaphezu kweyodwa. Akukho mgaqo oqhelekileyo wokuhlukanisa omnye komnye. Kufuneka uqaphele ukuba kukho iindidi zenguqu kwaye, kuxhomekeke kule nto, yenza. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba ufuna ukuguqula isimo sengqondo, kuya kufuneka udle indlovu kwizigaba, kwaye ukuba uyaphula - ke ulungiselele ukuzula phezu kwelasha.
Uncedo olungaphandle - isazi sengqondo, ukuqeqesha kunokukunceda ukuba uziqonde kwaye utshintshe ubomi bakho bube ngcono?
Ngokuqhelekileyo kunceda - kungekhona kuba abantu bathi abancedi. Kulula nje, abaninzi bethu badinga ukuvuselelwa kwangaphandle, ukukhuthaza. Ukusuka kwam amava ndiyazi ukuba emva kokufundiswa kwam inkokheli kunye nokukhula komntu, ukunyuka okungaqhelekanga kwezinga eliphezulu kunye nokuguqulwa kwabafundi kubonwa. Ukuba umnqweno wokutshintsha uvuthwe kuwe, kodwa awukwazi ukuguqula oko kufuneka uqalise khona, ingcali inokukunceda ukwenza oku. Into ephambili kukukhumbula ukuba izazi zeengqondo kunye neendlela zihluke kakhulu. Ngoko ke, ukuba kukho nawuphi na ongenakukunceda, qiniseka ukufumana enye. Gxininisa, okokuqala okokuqala, kwiingcali zinyani kunye namava omsebenzi omkhulu. Kwakhona, ngamnye kuthi, iindlela zethu nezindlela zethu zilungile. Utyando lwezobugcisa luya kwenza enye into, ingxoxo enye.
Abanye bakholelwa ukuba kwanele ukutshintsha indawo, kwaye yonke into iya kutshintsha ngexesha elilodwa.
Ngaba ngokwenene ukulahla udoti kunye nentlangano efanelekileyo yendawo yokuhlala ekhokelela ekubeni utshintsho olubalulekileyo ebomini bomntu-ibalulekileyo ebalulekileyo? Yonke into iyodwa. Mhlawumbi isebenza ukuba umntu ngokwakhe ukholelwa ngokuqinisekileyo kwisiphumo. Nangona ngaphandle kwengqondo yengqondo kwaye ngaphandle komsebenzi ngokwakho akwanele. Kubalulekile ukuziphulaphula. Ukuba ufuna ukulungiswa kwamanyathelo okuqhubela phambili - yenza.
Indawo engcwele ayizange ibe nalutho. Ngoko ke, umntu kufuneka akwazi ukulahla izinto ezindala, azilahle phantsi ngexesha. Emva koko, bafuna ukunakekelwa, kwenzeke. Kodwa kungekhona kuphela. Xa ufunde ukulahla udoti ngexesha, unokuziqhelanisa kwaye ulahleke iiminqweno ezingadingekile, imikhwa, ukudibanisa ngexesha elifanelekileyo. Emva koko, umkhwa wale nto ayikwazi ukubunjwa kwinqanaba leengqondo - kuphela kwizenzo zokuqala.
Ngokuphathelele umbutho ochanekileyo wendawo kunye nokudlulela okudumile kwe-feng shui, ukubonakaliswa kudlala indima ebalulekileyo apha. Ngokomzekelo, xa ufumene umfuziselo onokuthi uthatha ubutyebi, kwaye ubeka kwindawo echanekileyo, umntu uya kuba nobuthathaka ngakumbi kwaye athabathe impawu ezisuka ngaphandle. Kulo mmandla, ngokuqinisekileyo akayi kuphinda aphuthe amathuba amthembisa inzuzo. Isimboli sinceda sikwazi ukuvula, njengokungathi sivula amehlo ethu kwinto eyenzekayo.
Utshintsho lomfanekiso luboniswe njani kummandla wethu wangaphakathi?
Ngaphandle kokubona kwangaphakathi, akukho tshintsho lwangaphandle lomfanekiso luya kwenza uhluke.
Nanku siyakwazi ukuthetha ngokufaniswa. Kumntu, ukulungiswa kweenwele yimeko eqhelekileyo, kumntu-uphawu lwezinto ezintsha zobomi obutsha. Wonke umntu uyazikhethela. Ewe, umntu omtsha impumlo akakwazi ukuonwaba. Kodwa kwenzeka kwakhona ukuba inkcukacha engabalulekanga kubuninzi, umzekelo, isitya esitsha okanye ibhola elibizayo, utshintshe ngokupheleleyo isimo sengqondo somnikazi: unesimo sengqondo esahlukileyo ngokupheleleyo, mhlawumbi ujika intloko yakhe, uhamba. Yaye ingqongqo engazange ikwazi ukuthatha utshintsho, funda iimpawu zomzimba. Kwaye akukho ndawo kunye neenguqu ezinomdla.