Sinoyiko lokuba unyulo olutsha aluyi kufana nokuthanda kwakho kwangaphambili. Ngokukhawuleza uya kudanisa? Ngokukhawuleza uya kukunika loo mvakalelo eyayihlangene nendoda edluleyo.
Uyika ukwamkela uthando lomntu, kuba ucinga ukuba uya kukhubeka, okanye ukhawulwe. Ngenxa yoloyiko, ngokuphindaphindiweyo ubudlelwane buwa okanye abavumelekanga ukuba baqale. Ngenxa yoko, abafazi bahlala bekhetha ubudlelwane bexeshana, obubizwa ngokuba besini. Ngelishwa, emva kokusinda ekungcatshweni kweqabane, ibhinqa lithintela ngokwengqondo ubuhlobo obutsha, ukwesaba ukuthembela nokuvulela iqabane.
Kukho isizathu sokuba kukho ukwesaba ubuhlobo obutsha. Esi sizathu sivela kubuntwana ngokwawo. Ukuba, abazali babengumzekelo wentsapho eyonwabileyo, ngoko umfazi ufika kwisigqibo sokuba akayi kuba nolwalamano olusonwabileyo. Akunakwenzeka kuye ukuba ubudlelwane bunokuba lula, buyavuya, kwaye lunandipha. Amava angaphumelelanga kubazali ekwakheni ubudlelwane, iiprojekthi ziyesaba ukuqala ubudlelwane babo.
Ukuba umfazi wayekhulile kwintsapho enomdla kwaye enothando, apho wayehlala ezama ukubonakalisa ukuba intsapho yesibili kwimeko ayisayikho. Oku kukhokelela ekubeni iinjongo zabafazi malunga nosapho kunye nobudlelwane baxakile kakhulu. Yaye ukufumana umntu olungileyo akunakwenzeka.
Ukuba ubuza umfazi umbuzo wendlela ebona ngayo ulwalamano lwakhe lwexesha elizayo, ngoko, uya kuqalisa ukuluhlu iimpawu umntu ayenayo. Intsapho kufuneka ibe nolonwabo, akufuneki kube nokuxabana neemeko. Ukuba akaqinisekanga ukuba yonke into iya kuba yile ndlela, kulula ukuba yedwa kunokuba uhlupheke kwimtshato engonwabileyo. Iingcali zengqondo zikholelwa ukuba ingxaki ebalulekileyo yabasetyhini, ebangela ukwesaba ulwalamano olutsha-kukuba bajonga umntu ukuba "ingubo entsha esitolo." Ukufunwa kwakhe kuphela kuthathwa ingqalelo. Ekuqaleni, akalungele ukunika ubudlelwane.
Ukuba ibhinqa lizinqoba, uyamkela ubomi kunye nayo yonke into ejikeleze kuyo, ngoko uya kuba nethuba elingcono lokwakha ubudlelwane obuhlala. Uloyiko kunye nempembelelo yeziganeko ezingabonakaliyo azibonakali ngabantu abadala kunye nokuzithemba.
Ukukhuseleka kukunye ukwesaba ulwalamano olutsha. Ukuzithoba okuncinci kubangela ukuba inkokheli engacingi ukuba nokwakha intsapho okanye nokuba nokwenza umtshato omfutshane.
Kule meko, kukho enye icebo leengcebiso: qalisa uthando nokuzithemba.
Abanamandla, abanokuzithemba nabasetyhini banokwesaba ubudlelwane. Kukho iingcamango kuzo, ukuba amandla kunye nesimo sayo kuya kunkwantya nawuphi na umntu. Igobolondo yayo ingamandla, ubuhle, ukuzithemba, ukuphakama kwabanye. Kwaye, eqinisweni, ngaphakathi kwintombazana yensimbi ihlala intombazana enentlonelo enqwenela ukuba nomvakalelo olula kunye nomhle-uthando.
Uloyiko lokulahlekelwa inkululeko, lubophelelwe ziimo zengqondo kunye nezibophelelo ezandleni nasezinyaweni. Ibhinqa linobomi, indoda ayifani nantoni na. Kuye kunye nolwalamano nje alinaso ixesha, kuba yonke imihla ifakwe kwizinto ezincinci.
Ukwesaba okukhulu kolwalamano olutsha kuhlangene nabasetyhini abanabantwana emva komtshato wabo wangaphambili. Kubonakala kuye ukuba abantwana abayi kwamkela otyunjweyo omtsha, okanye akayi kukwazi ukujamelana nemisebenzi emitsha, akayi kubabathanda abantwana, njengoko angathanda. Kule meko, kubalulekile ukuba uqonde ukuba abantwana baya kudala okanye kamva bakhule kwaye benze ii-soybe zentsapho, kwaye uya kuhlala ehlathini eliphukileyo.