Ulwalamano olukhululekile: kunye nokuchasene

Ubudlelwane buhlala bunzima, nangona xa uqala ukujonga kulula. Kwaye maxa wambi ulwalamano oluqala ngothando olusulungekileyo lwe-pastoral, luphukile emva kweminyaka embalwa malunga neentlanzi zokuxhatshazwa kunye nezibango. Kwaye, njengomgaqo, esinye sezizathu eziphambili zokuphula ubudlelwane ngumona kunye nokungcatsha.

Yaye ukuba kunjalo, ngoko umbuzo uvela njani ukuphepha umona nokungcatsha, kuba, njengokuba uyazi, inyama yomntu ibuthathaka. Kwaye sonke asikho isono. Kwaye kule meko, isiluleko esidala siza kukuhlangula, ukuba awukwazi ukutshintsha imeko, utshintshe isimo sakho sengqondo. Ukuba sisebenzisa lesi saga kwimeko yethu, sinokucebisa ukuba uzame ubudlelwane obuvulekileyo.

Okokuqala, kufuneka uzame ukucinga ukuba luphi ubudlelwane obuvulekile. Ukususela kwicala lingabonakala ukuba wonke umntu ulala naye ufuna kunye nalapho efuna, kodwa ngokwenene into yonke yinkimbinkimbi kwaye ilula. Emva kwayo yonke into, nangona kunjalo, ukuba ubudlelwane bekhululekile banemithetho yabo kunye nemithetho. Okokuqala, kukuhlonela inkululeko yomnye nomnye, kodwa kufuneka ukhumbule ukuba uyathandana, kwaye umsebenzi wakho awuyi kulala nabantu abaninzi kunokwenzeka, kodwa ukudibanisa kulwalamano. Kule ndlela kulandela ukuba izigqibo malunga nobudlelwane obukhululekile kufuneka uthabathe kunye, kwaye zombini kufuneka zilungele.

Okwesibini, nangona uvumela ukuba omnye nomnye ahlale esondelene nomntu, ngelixa kufuneka ube kwindawo yomnye kwindawo yokuqala. Kwaye ukuba kubalulekile ukuba omnye wenu ukuba usondele kule mzuzwana, kufuneka ube khona kwaye ubeke bonke abathandekayo ngaphandle.

Okwesithathu, kufuneka uqonde ukuba akuvumelekanga kuphela ukuba udibane nomnye umntu, kodwa kunye neqabane lakho. Ngoko cinga malunga nokuba uya kuhamba.

Ngoko, emva kokuba siqaphele ukuba ubudlelwane bobukhulu buba nemithetho, makhe sijonge kwaye sisilinganise, zonke kunye nokuchasana ubudlelwane obukhululekile. Ingaba ngaba kunjalo? Ngoko, qwa lasele ngempumelelo.

Okunye 1. Akukho nto iyakwenqabela, akukho nto yokuyiphula.

Njengoko ubuBuddha sisifundisa, ukungonwabi komntu kwiminqweno engenziwanga. UbuBuddhism bokwenyaniso sisifundisa, siphume iminqweno, sinikezela kwakhona, sichitha izibambiso ezikhusela ukuphunyezwa kweminqweno. Ukuba ukhangeleka kumntu, kodwa uyaqonda ukuba le yimizimba kuphela kwaye awunayo imvakalelo kuye, kwaye ukuba awuyi kulwa neqabane lakho. Kwimodeli eqhelekileyo yokuziphatha komntu oyedwa, ukuvuselelwa okunjalo kunokubangela iingxaki ezinzulu kwiintsebenziswano kunye nentanda. Ngobudlelwane obukhululekile, unokwenza ubulili ngaphandle kokuzibophelela kunye nendoda oyithandayo, kwaye oku akuyi kubangela mntu naziphi na izikhalazo kunye neengxaki.

Ngaphezu 2. Uhlala uvakalelwa.

Njengoko uqeqesho lubonisa, izibini zivame ukuphuka kwiqabane lokuba amaqabane athathwe ngokukrakra ngomnye ngokomzimba. Yaye ubomi babo bobulili abufanelanga nhlobo. Ngobudlelwane obuqhelekileyo, oku kusoloko kukhokelela kwiinkxwaleko, kwaye kungekhona iinyembezi. Ngobudlelwane obukhululekile, le ngxaki ixazululwa ngokukhawuleza, isondo esincinane kwicala lizisa umlambo omtsha kunye nobomi bakho obusondeleyo.

Imfutshane 1. Umbono woluntu.

Ukuba unqume ulwalamano oluvulekileyo, ngoko kufuneka uqonde ukuba ngokuqinisekileyo kwimeko yakho kukho umntu oza kuthatha le ngcamango ngokungathandekiyo. Kwaye kulungile ukuba ungumhlobo omnye okanye ezimbini ezikude. Kwaye ukuba ngaba ngabazali okanye abahlobo abasondeleyo, kunye nabamelwane ekuhlaleni, kuya kufuneka uphinde ucinge kwakhona ukuba uyayifumana yini, kuba akunakwenzeka xa ungena emnyango ndicinga ukuba uhamba. Ewe, unako ukufihla okanye ukuphalaza ngoluvo lwentlalo, kodwa ihlala ilukhuni kwaye ingathandeki.

Minus 2. Ithuba lokulahlekelwa ngumthandayo.

Emva kwakho konke, njengoko siqondayo, ngobudlelwane bobukhulu, asikho nje kuphela esinelungelo, "ngakwesobunxele," kodwa wethu othandekayo. Ngoko ke, kukho umngcipheko wokuba thina ngokwethu sisichukumise esandleni se-scatterer. Ngako oko, ngaphambi kokuhamba nobudlelwane obuvulekile, kufuneka ucinge ngokucophelela malunga nokuba ulungele yini kubo. Njengoko siqonda, ebuhlotsheni obuvulekileyo, kungekhona nje ukuba sinelungelo, ngakwesobunxele. Ngokufanelekileyo. bahlobo abasondeleyo. ubomi.