Ukwamukelwa kuyinyathelo elibi kakhulu nasiphi na intsapho. Emva koko, abazali abatsha banomthwalo omkhulu wokukhulisa umntwana ngothando, ukuchuma kunye nokuqonda, ukukhupha ukuze akhenge aqikelele ngento engazange izalwe. Xa uthabathe umntwana, inxaxheba ebalulekileyo idlalwa ngunyaka athe wangena kuyo kwintsapho nokuba ingaba neentsapho. Inyaniso kukuba umthetho awunqandeli izalamane ukuba zithathe umntwana, ngaphandle kokuba zenzakalise. Nangona kunjalo, umgaqo "wenzakaliso" ungabonwa ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo. Ngokuqhelekileyo kwenzeka ukuba emva kokuthetha kunye nezihlobo, umntwana uqala ukwenza amabango ahlukeneyo kubazali aze enze ama-scandals. Indlela yokusebenza kwiimeko xa ukuthetha kunye nesihlobo somntwana owamkelweyo akunako ukumiswa?
Impembelelo engalunganga yezihlobo
Okokuqala, kukufanelekile ukuthetha nezihlobo ngokwabo. Akunjalo ukuba incoko iya kuzisa umphumo omuhle, kodwa kulungele ukuzama. Ukuba izalamane zikhulu, oomkhulu, oomama, oomama okanye oodade kunye nabazalwana, ngoko kufanelekile ukuchazela kubo bonke ukuba kubalulekile ukuba umntwana unentsapho efanelekileyo ngokwaneleyo apho evakalelwa yintando nokukhathalela. Ngokusoloko kubonakala ngathi singenza ngcono umntwana kwaye ngaphezu kwabanye. Kodwa umntwana owamkelweyo kufuneka abe namagunya athile. Ngako oko, cacisa kwiintsapho zakhe ukuba ukuthetha akufanele kuncitshiswe kwi nyaniso yokuba yonke indlela bafuna ukubonisa ukuba bangabantwana bakhe abalungileyo. Awufanele uphinde ufikelele ebantwini kwaye ubeke izibopho kwiintsapho zokuchitha ubuhlobo bakho kunye nendodana okanye intombi yakho. Inyaniso kukuba ngokuqwalasela ukuthetha okunjalo, umntwana uya kuqinisekile ngokusemandleni akho. Uya kuwela emehlweni akhe, kodwa izalamane, ngokuchaseneyo, ziya kuvuka. Ngoko ke, zama ukuziphatha ngobumnene nangobulumko. Nangona kunjalo, kunokwenzeka ukuba uchaze ukuba ukuba unxibelelwano olunjalo lusongela ukuphuhlisa nokuphucula umntwana wakho, kuya kupheliswa.
Ukuphanga
Kwakhona, kukho iimeko xa izalamane zomntwana owamkelweyo zizama ukufumana iinzuzo. Ngokukodwa kule nto iphumelela oomama nooyise, ngokuzenzekelayo bazivakalise kwaye baqale ukuxelela indlela abathanda ngayo unyana okanye intombi yabo, endleleni, bengakhohlwa ukumcela imali. Kule meko, akukho mbuzo wothando ngomntwana. Aba bantu baqhutywa yintando kunye nokuthetha nabo abayi kuzuza nantoni na. Kufuneka ufumane indlela yokubonisa enkundleni abaye bathatha inkohlakalo kwaye bayeke ukunxibelelana. Ukuba olu khetho alufanelekanga ngesizathu esithile, thetha nomntwana. Kodwa akukho mzekelo kuyimfuneko ukumqinisekisa ukuba unina okanye uyise unobungozi. Khumbula ukuba umntwana sele sele ejongene noxinzelelo, ingakumbi xa engazange azi ukuba ngubani okhuselekileyo. Ngoko ke, soloko umnika ithuba lokucinga nokuhlalutya ngokuzimela. Kanye xa uqaphela ukuba abazali bezinto eziphilayo bazama ukuphinda baphinde baphinde baphinde baphinde, mnike into ebalulekileyo kulo, kwaye, ngokukhawuleza, yichaze imeko, mnike umzekelo uze uzivumele ucinge. Abantwana abanako ukuma xa bachithwa kwaye ngokukhawuleza baqale i-antiattack. Kodwa xa bavunyelwe ukuzicingela, abafana baqala ukuhlaziya yonke into baze bafike kwisigqibo esifanelekileyo.
Kodwa ke, ukuba sithetha malunga neemeko xa izalamane zomntwana owamkelweyo zivela, umsebenzi wakho kukuzama ukuqinisekisa ukuba ubuncinci ubudlelwane obungathathi hlangothi bubekwe phakathi kwentsapho yonke, oko kuthetha. Eyona nto ibhetele, ubungane. Inyani kukuba abazali abaninzi benza iphosakelo kwaye baqala ukunyanga izihlobo zomntwana. Oku kuphosakeleyo. Ewe, abazali banomuvo wokuthi umntu ufuna ukuthatha umntwana kwaye baqala ukumkhusela. Kodwa kunokuthi ukuba izalamane ziqaphele ngokupheleleyo amalungelo omzali bakho, zifuna nje ukuthatha inxaxheba ebomini bomntwana, kuba ziyamthanda nje.