Sivame ukuba sahlukane nabathandekayo bakho. Sifana nabo, sifuna ukubamba yonke into ebomini! "Awuyi kulahlekelwa yintando?" - sihlala sizibuza. Emva kokuhlukana, akugcini nje ukuqinisa ubudlelwane kunye nokongeza iintlanganiso zothando. Oku kuyingozi enkulu-uthando kumgama: indlela yokuziphatha kwimeko efanayo? Makhe sithethe ngazo zonke iingxaki kunye nokuxhamla kolwalamano olunjalo.
KWIMIBUZO EYAWO
Imeko 1. Umyeni wakho usebenza kwelinye idolophu malunga nonyaka ngoku. Ukunyuka kwakho kuye kuhlaselwa rhoqo ngenxa yomsebenzi nomama, okuya kwenzeka xa ushiya khona. Ngokukhawuleza ujwayelene nomntu onomdla kakhulu. Uyakuthandana nawe kwaye ugxininise ubuhlobo obusondeleyo. Kwaye kamva uye kwenza ube ngumnikelo. Kwaye ngokuzenzekelayo uzifumene "ngxantathu": wena, umyeni wakho, ode kakhulu, kunye nomntu omthandayo, kunye nomhlobo wakho onithandayo. Yintoni endiyenzayo?
Ukuqonda le nxantathu nokwenza isigqibo esifanelekileyo, kufuneka uqale wenze ukhetho phakathi komama nomyeni. Ngaba uyazi ukuba kutheni uthando lomama lubizwa ngokuba yindlela ephezulu kakhulu yothando? Kungenxa yokuba umama uvumela umntwana wakhe ukuba aphile ubomi obuhlukile kuye.
Kwaye, ke, sinokugqiba ukuba ngaba uthando lwakho luphelelwe ngumyeni wakho kwaye kunye nabani na madoda owakhayo ebomini bakho, kufuneka wena (ngaphandle koluncedo lwenyoko). Kwaye into ephambili kukuqonda into oyifunayo.
Ngobudlelwane obutsha, abafazi basoloko bethandwa ngumzuzwana wendalo, uthando. Kwaye, ngaphezu koko, kunzima kakhulu ukutshintsha indlela yakho yokuphila ngokuqhelekileyo kwaye uhambela kwenye idolophu kunokuba udibanise uqhagamshelwano olutsha "ngoku nalapha". Imisebenzi efana nokuhamba kunye nokufumana imisebenzi emitsha kufuna umzamo omkhulu kunye namandla. Kodwa kukho ibhonasi enkulu-ngobudlelwane obuye bagqithisa uvavanyo lokuhlukana, ubuninzi bebuso bobuqili bubonakala. Ukuthembela, ukuthembela komnye nomnye uthando, ukuzinikela. Kwaye okubaluleke kakhulu, uthando olunqobileyo olo luhlu luba luleke ngakumbi emehlweni abo baqabane. Baqala ukuphathana ngokucophelela.
Kufuneka uthathe ukhangelelwano olujongene nolwalamano nomhlobo wakho omtsha uze uqaphele ukuba bafanelekile ukuba batshintshe ubomi babo obomi. Yintoni umhlobo omtsha onokunika yona? Ngaba uya kuvuya naye? Iliphi ikamva le nhlangano?
UTHANDO NGEMISEBENZI
Isimo 2. Usebenza kwenye idolophu. Ishedyuli yakho ibonakala kanje: iveki uhlala ekhaya, iveki. Umsebenzi wakho ubaluleke kakhulu kuwe, kwaye uyahlawulwa kakuhle. Intanda yakho ekuqaleni yayikuchasene nokuhamba kwakho, kodwa wakwazi ukumqinisekisa ukuba kuya kuba ngcono kubo bobabini. Uyamthanda, kodwa ufuna ukuba uzibonele njengengcali! Nangona kunjalo, kungekudala ucinga ukuba ufumene lo msebenzi ukuba ubaleke ekhaya. Kwaye kufuneka nje uyingxenye nomntu oyithandayo.
Ngokwemvelo, ngenxa yolonwabo lomfazi wamanamhlanje, uthando olulodwa alaneleyo, ufuna ukuzibonela kulo msebenzi okanye umsebenzi. Apha, ekubonweni kokuqala, kukho iingenelo kuphela. Kodwa kwimeko efanayo, kukho ukuphazamiseka: ukufuna ngamandla uthando kunye nolwalamano, ufuna ukuhlala ukhululekile. Uloyiko lokulahleka ngokwakho ngokuba yinxalenye yeqabane. Uve uloyiko lokuba umthandayo uya kuthatha amandla akho nexesha lakho.
Makhe sibone. Ulwalamano oluthando lokwenene lukwazi ukuziphatha ngokuchanekileyo, oko kukuthi, ukugcina ubudlelwane obuhle kwiimimandla emibini. Ukuba ufuna inkululeko ebubudlelwaneni, mhlawumbi le shedyuli ikuvumela ukuba ugcine uthando? Futhi akufanele ucinge iingcinga ezimbi? Ngaphezu koko, intanda yam iyavumelana nesigqibo sakho.
Akukho nto ihlazo, umzekelo, ukuphumla ngokwahlukileyo. Emva kwakho konke, ukuzalisa iimvakalelo zakho ngehlabathi lakho langaphakathi, ngoko unako ukunikezana ngakumbi kunokuba uhlala upheka. Ngako oko, ngokuqhelekileyo kwiibinibini apho zombini amaqabane anelisekile kwaye azithembele, uthando lude luqinisa ubuhlobo. Abalingani banethuba lokungaphupha kuphela ngesihloko sokuphila okukhululekileyo, kodwa nokufumanisa intlawulo yayo. Ngoko, kulungile ukubeka izinto eziphambili.
IIMISEBENZI ZEMISEBENZI
Isimo 3. Imisebenzi oyithandayo kwenye idolophu iintsuku ezingama-5 ngeveki kwaye iza kuwe ngeveki neeholide. Ngexesha leentlanganiso zakho, uzama ukunika ithuba lokunika ixesha. Kodwa ufuna ukuhlala naye rhoqo. Ulwalamano lwakho lubonakala lubomelele, kodwa uhlaziyiweyo njalo ngumbungu ongathandabuzekiyo lo thando olukude kunye neentlanganiso ezimfutshane ngeveki-ntsuku ziya kubakhokelela ekuphumeni.
Ukwesaba kwakho, okunokwenzeka, akunanto. Emva koko, ngexesha lomhlangano omfutshane ngeveki, uzinikezela ngokupheleleyo. Ukuphuka kwangempela akuyona intlanganiso emfutshane, kodwa ukungabikho kwemvakalelo. Kakade, kuyimvelo ukuba xa uthanda, ufuna ukuchitha ixesha elininzi kunye nomthandayo. Kodwa akusoloko bebona abanye imihla ngemihla, banovuyo kunabo bahlala behlala behlukana.
Inyaniso kukuba nguwe kuphela thina esibumba ubudlelwane bethu nabantu abasondeleyo kwaye sinqume indlela yokuziphatha ngokufanelekileyo. Akukho mntu ngaphandle kwethu oya kusivuyisa. Iingcebiso eziphambili kule meko kukukwenza into enomdla ngexesha lothandekayo wakho engekho. Umzekelo, ukufunda iilwimi, yoga, ukudweba, ukucula - nantoni na! Emva koko kuya kuba mnandi ukuba ube yedwa kunye nawe. Uya kuba namathuba amakhulu okukhula nokuziphucula. Kwaye iintlanganiso zakho kunye nentanda yakho iya kuba nzima ngakumbi kunaphambili, kuba uya kuba nento yokwabelana ngayo!
Kwaye into eyona nto: ngelixa wena kunye nomthandi wakho unomnqweno wokuthetha, mamela, uqondane, akukho nto iya kukuvimba ekuthandeni nasekuhlanganiseni, kude kube kude.
NGOKUBHELWA KWI-OCEAN
Isimo 4. Utshatile ngaphezu kweminyaka emithathu. Unyaka odlulileyo udibana nomyeni wakho zonke iinyanga ezimbalwa, ngenxa yokuba wahamba waya emsebenzini, umzekelo, eHolland. Ugcina imali yendlu, kwaye isigqibo sexesha esithile sahlukana. Umyeni wam wayesoloko wathi ixesha liza kuhamba ngokukhawuleza, kwaye kungekudala uza kuba khona. Kodwa kungekudala wathetha kuwe: "Ndiya e-Atlanta unyaka, kuba sifuna imali yokuhlala." Ulahlekelwe kwaye udidekile: "Akayithandi nonke! Kwaye imfuneko yokufumana imali yefestile iyisizathu. "
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, baninzi phakathi kwethu abashiya intsapho ixesha elide ukuqinisekisa ikusasa labo. Yaye ukuba ucinga nokuba "iparadesi ekhompyutheni" ayikho mngcipheko olwalamano kunokuba uhlule ngenxa yexesha elizayo elikhuselekileyo, umbuzo uphendululwa ngokwawo.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, le meko ingenakwenzeka. Akukho siqinisekiso sokuba umyeni wakho akayi kuvuselela isivumelwano sakhe. Ekugqibeleni, ezininzi zinokutshintsha ngonyaka. Ngamanye amaxesha umntu osondeleyo, oncedisayo kwiimeko ezinzima kwaye unika inkxaso yokuziphatha, uya kuba yindleko kwaye aqheleke ngakumbi kunowesifazane ongaphandle kwamanye amazwe. Into ephambili kuwe akuyikukhawuleza kwizigqibo "uyakuthanda, akayithandi". Kodwa akukho mfuneko yokuvumela izinto zihambe ngokwazo. Iingcali zengqondo zincoma kwiimeko ezinjalo ukunika umyeni wakhe isicwangciso, indlela yokulungisa yonke into, ukuze ingabhubhisi intsapho ngenxa yemali. Ngokomzekelo, xubusha naye ithuba lokuhlala ndawonye e-Atlanta. Okanye, ukuba ukuhamba kwe-Faith for America akunakwenzeka ngesizathu esithile, cwangcisa ngononophelo iintlanganiso ezizayo. Kwaye ixesha liza kuxela ukuba uyathandana nomnye. Emva koko, uthando lokwenene akukho miqobo kunye nemida!
KWIIKIMODINI
Isimo 5. Ukususela ebuntwaneni uphupha ukuxhumela isithuba nomntu womntu - umdlali okanye umculi. Kodwa xa iphupha lakho lifezekile, kwavela ukuba ixesha lakho eliyintandokazi lisetyenziswe kwiihotele okanye uhambo. Kodwa uthando lwakho luhlala luhlala lukhuthaze ukuhlukana. Kwaye ngokukhawuleza uya kufumanisa ukuba wenqaba iphrojekthi ayenokuyenza ekhaya. Iingqungquthela zaqala, waziva ukuba ulahlekelwa yithemba kuye. Uthi: "Nceda, kuqonda, kufuneka ndihambe ndibuyele kuwe, ukuba ndihlale kunye nawe!" Ngaba kunjalo ngokwenene, kwaye ukuba ube kunye kuthetha ukuthatha inxaxheba kuyo yonke ixesha?
Ngaba ukwesaba ukukholelwa amazwi omthandayo? Kutheni ungakholelwa kwizenzo zakhe. Emva koko, inyaniso ayithethi loo mntu, kodwa kutheni uthetha. Intando yakho ithi: "Ndimele ndibuyele." Uthe oku ngenxa yokuba ufuna ukuba nawe kunye nethemba lokuqonda kwakho. Le yinyaniso.
Kakade ke, akukho ndlela ekhoyo yokuthanda uthando ekude - indlela yokuziphatha ngokufanelekileyo wonke umntu uzimisela. Kodwa yintoni enokuyenza, ukuba indawo endiyithandayo inkululeko yindawo enkulu? Nantsi enye kufuneka ithathe ingqalelo into ebalulekileyo ebalulekileyo: kuba abaninzi abantu basebenzi bokudala, uhlaziyo oluqhubekayo oluvela ngaphandle lufunekayo - utshintsho lwezinto ezibonakalayo, indawo, abantu. Ngoko ke, akufanele ucinge ukuba le nto ungayinikezi intanda yakho. Kuphela nje ukuba ihlabathi likhulu kakhulu. Ukuze uzuze ukuvisisana, kufuneka ahlukane nawe ngezikhathi ezithile. Kwaye kuyinto eqhelekileyo! Umbuzo wodwa nje ukuba unomonde nokuqonda. Kodwa uyamthanda, oko kuthetha ukuba uya kufunda ukuqonda kwaye uyamkela into.