Ukususela ekuzalweni kwayo, uxhulumano oluqinileyo lwengqondo lubekwe phakathi komama nomntwana. Yingakho i-psychology yobudlelwane bomama kunye nendodana yakhe ibaluleke kakhulu. Kuye kwaboniswa ixesha elide ukuba ukuba unina akayithobeli ingqalelo ngokwaneleyo kumntwana wakhe, unokuthi akakwazi ukuthetha ixesha elide, abe nesidenge, kwaye ekugqibeleni akhule abe ngumntu onzima kwaye okhuniweyo. Nangona kunjalo, kwi-psychology yobudlelwane phakathi koomama nendodana, kukho imiba emininzi.
Ingakumbi ukuba umama ukhulela umntwana yodwa. Ngako oko, umama kufuneka abe ngokuvisisana kwengqondo, akwazi ukudumisa kuphela, kodwa aphinde ajezise umntwana, kodwa soloko efumana umgangatho ophakathi. Emva kwakho konke, kuba unyana wam kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba ukususela kumntwana wam umntwana wayeqonda ukuba wayeyindoda ezayo. Ngoko ke, ngobudlelwane kunye nendodana yakhe, iindlela ezininzi ezifanelekileyo zokukhulisa intombi azikwazi ukusetyenziswa. Ngokomzekelo, oomama abanenkxalabo kunye nabasebenzayo baphazamisa ukuphuhliswa kwengqondo ngokuqhelekileyo, emva koko bayajezisa, baze babhubhise umntwana, kunye nezenzo ezifanayo. Ngenxa yoko, abantwana abanjalo bafumana "oonyana baka-mama", abo bonke ubomi babo babambelela kumama wabo kunye nokufuna ukuba bakhuthaze ukuba baxhamle. Kodwa oomama bomnini, abafazi begunya ngokubanzi, banqanda zonke iimpawu zabo kubantwana, bazama ukuphakamisa unyana wabo ngendlela abayifunayo, ngelixa bengayithobeli iitalente kunye neminqweno. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, umama uhlala efuna izinto ezintle kubantwana, kodwa kuvela okuchaseneyo. Ukuze kusetyenziswe ubudlelwane obufanelekileyo kunye kunye nendodana ukususela kwiminyaka yobutsha kuyimfuneko ukuba ufunde imigaqo ephambili eya kunceda ukuba ungagcini umntu kuwo, kodwa ukuhlakulela indoda eyinyani, kwaye ingabi yimpembelelo.
Eyona nto ifanelekileyo
Ukuba le nkwenkwe ingenayo uyise, utatomkhulu, umalume okanye umhlobo osondeleyo wosapho lwendoda kufuneka achithe ixesha elininzi kunye naye. Ingane kufuneka ibone phambi kwayo into enokulingana nayo. Ngelishwa, nangakumbi kwiintsapho ezizalisekileyo, abafana kaninzi abanalo imfundo eyaneleyo yamadoda, kuba uyise uhlala esebenza, kwaye umntwana unogogo okanye unina. Ukugcinwa okuqhubekayo kwabasetyhini kugxotha umgaqo wesilisa kuye. Oku akuvumelekanga. Ngoko ke, ukuba kunokwenzeka, vumela unyana achithe ixesha elininzi kunye nomkhulu wakhe okanye uyise. Into ephambili kukuba isalamane ngokwenene yayingumntu onokukwazi kwaye kufuneka ulingane.
Ukuba umntwana akanalo ithuba lokunxibelelana namadoda amadala, makhe achithe ixesha elininzi kunye nabafana bakhe. Kwakhona kuncedo kubafana ukuba bafunde iincwadi baze babukele iifilimu, apho abalinganiswa abakhulu bengamadoda okwenene. Musa nje unike unyana wakhe iintlobo ezahlukeneyo ze-melodramas kunye neenkosana ezicwangcisiweyo. Ngonyana wakhe kungcono ukubukela iifrimu ze-adventure, apho amadoda ahlakaniphile, anamandla, ngokubanzi, abakhuseli bokwenene. Kodwa ifilimu, apho ubundlobongela obuninzi bungcono ukubonisa. Emva koko, esemncinci umntwana uyakwazi ukudibanisa ngokulula imifanekiso yeqhawe kunye ne-villain.
Musa ukubamba umntwana "ngengubo"
Xa umntwana ekhula, umama kufuneka afunde ukuvumela ukuba umntwana aye kuye. I-psychology yenkwenkwezi yenzelwe ngendlela enokuqonda ngayo uthando oludlulileyo kumama njengomthwalo. Ukuba umama uyamthanda inkwenkwe kakhulu, kunzima ukuba adibanise namantombazana kwaye abe ngabahlobo naye, kuba yena ngokwakhe engaziqali ukuba umama uhlala ephakama ebomini bakhe. Ngoko ukuba ebuntwaneni uthabathe yonke inkxalabo kwaye uyenzela yena kunye noyise nonina, kufuneka uvelise ngokuthe ngcembe umntwana ukuba umama ungumfazi kwaye usemfana, ngoko kufuneka ancede unina aze amhlonele, umama, kwakhona, uya kunika unyana ithuba lokuba azimeleyo kwaye uxanduva lwezenzo zakhe. Nangona ubona ukuba unyana uyaphutha, akudingeki ukuba ulungise njalo, ngaphandle kokuba imeko ayikho imfuneko. Ungumntu, kwaye umntu ngokwakhe makakwazi ukulungisa iimpazamo zakhe kwaye angabi nokwesaba ukubetha kwexesha elizayo. Ngoko ke, kungakhathaliseki ukuba ungamthandi kangakanani unyana wakho, zama ukungahambi kakhulu, kungekhona ukuba ube yingxenye yobudlelwane bakhe nabanye abantu kwaye ungamphoqeleli ukuba akhethe phakathi koomama nentombi okanye umama nabahlobo. Khumbula ukuba abafana oomama baye bahlala bekhathalele ukuba bakhulise abantwana kwaye baneliswe, bangakwazi ukudala ubudlelwane obuqhelekileyo baze bajoyine uluntu.