Great Illusion
Andiyithandi abantu asebekhulile besuka kwimbono ye-psychotherapist okanye isifo sengqondo ngumsebenzi wokuzikhusela, inkolelo yokukhohlisa nokukhohlakeleyo: "Asisoze sibe njalo, asiyi kuphinda sife kwaye sife." Emva koko ulandela isigqibo esithi: "Abadala bafanele batyhale, ukuba badala." Yintoni evumela ukuba sikholwe ukuba ubudala abuyi kusibamba? Ngokumangalisayo, inzululwazi. Kule minyaka engama-edlulileyo, malunga neengcamango ezilikhulu zokuguga, ezihamba kunye neziphakamiso, ziye zaphuhliswa, njani "ukuzilungisa." Sitshintsha ngokuguqulwa kofuzo "ukuguga kwemizimba" (ekukho apho abaninzi abantu bengabaza). Ukulahlekisa iiseli ngokuzifaka i-microelement ethile, eyenza uqhagamshelwano oluphakathi. Ekugqibeleni, nqakraza, ukhuphe, kwaye apho kuyimfuneko-ukupompa isikhumba, njengokungathi yindoda endala, engafani nayo, efuna ukuqoshwa kwakhona. Konke oku kuvuyisayo kwaye kukhangeleka ngokusisigxina kangangokuthi asinakukwazi ukuphatha ngokucacileyo ulwazi olunjalo, kwindawo ethile eqinisekisayo ukuba izizukulwana ezidlulileyo zibadala ngenxa yokuba babengenalo ithuba lokusebenzisa iimpumelelo ze-genetics kunye neyeza zobugcisa. Sikhohlwa ukuba yonke into ixhomekeke kwingqondo. Yiyiphi impazamo eyathunyelwa esuka kwingqondo ukuvelisa okanye ukuyeka ukuveliswa kwamahomoni, ukuba ingqondo iqalise (okanye ikhuphe) inkqubo yokuguga ngaphambi kokudala, kunye nokubangela ukuguga, ukuphuma kwesikhashana, ubunzima obukhulu, imibimbi. Kwaye ekubeni isayensi ingazange ifumaneke izixhobo zokuvuselela ingqondo, sikhetha ukucinga ukuba ngaphandle kwesimo sengqondo esifanelekileyo, ukulahlwa ngokugqithiseleyo nokunyamekisayo kokungabikho komsebenzi kunye ne-phobias - kubandakanywa ne-gerontophobia, ngaphandle kokuqeqeshwa rhoqo kwemizwa efanelekileyo kunye nengqondo engakumbi, ulutsha alukwazi . Umntu usemncinci, nje ngokuba unako ukwenza into enomdla kunye nokubeka iinjongo ezintsha. Oku kubonakala ixesha elide, ngoko ke akuvelisi umphumo ongenamangalisa njengokukwazi ukuvuselela iiseli zakho ngaphandle kokunciphisa, nje ngokusela into ethile "imilingo".
Ngaba kukho ubuxoki kwindawo yamagama?
Ukuba siphendule kwiingxelo zengqondo apho abantu bahlala befihliwe bubulumko, sibona ukuba abantu asebekhulile bangabonakaliyo abanamava okuphila, nolwazi, nenkxaso engathandekiyo, kunye nokuba isimo sengqondo esinobubele, sokuzola, esihloniphekileyo sihlala sizuzwa (okanye, kwindlela yokujonga, uhlawula), kwaye uyaphatheka - uyahlwaywa. Kodwa ngelo xesha, abantu asebekhulile badla ngokukhawuleza. Ingxaki yabamama banamhlanje kukuba nangona bazinika ixesha loonyana babo kwaye baqiniseka ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba benza konke ngenxa yenzalo, bachitha eli xesha kungekhona ekudaleni ubudlelwane obuqinileyo obubangelwa yintliziyo, kodwa ngenxa yentshukumo yentlalo yomntwana. Ngamanye amazwi, ingqwalasela kunye nokubaluleka kunikwa ekufundiseni isiNgesi, ukukhwabanisa imifanekiso okanye uhlobo lwezobugcisa kunemisebenzi yokubambisana, ukuzihlaziya ngokubambisana, amava kunye kunye nokuqiqa. Isiphumo sisoloko siqikelelwa: kubantwana abafumana ukugonywa kwangaphambili kwintsebenzo kunye neminqweno yomsebenzi, abantu abanelisekileyo, abangajolise ekunikezeni ingqalelo yabo kunye nokufudumala komntu kubantu abasondeleyo, bakhula ukuze baphumelele, bathole ngokwaneleyo. Ngokukodwa - unina, owathi, ngokudibanisa kweemeko, ngokunyuka ufuna iimfuno eziqhelanisiweyo kunye neengcinezelo ezingqondweni kunye nabantwana bakhe. Banika iingcebiso, umsebenzi okanye umyalelo, kodwa benza okulula. Kulo mfanekiso ubonakala ungabonakaliyo, kukho ukuchasana, okungekho nto eyenziwa ngayo ixesha lethu.
Emva kwayo yonke into, ukuba kwiingxelo zenkcazo zinyanzelisiwe kwaye zitsho ngokucacileyo ukuba kuyimfuneko ukuhlonipha abantu asebekhulile, oku kubonisa ukuba nakwezinsuku zakudala, yonke into yayingabonakaliyo phakathi kootata nabantwana. Enye into yokuba abantwana abaphulaphule le ngxelo, baxelelwa ngandlela-thile, oogogo, abangazange baqaphele ngokungqinelaniyo kwintlalo kunye nesimo esiyimfuneko sokuphulaphula abadala. Enyanisweni, ngokuxhomekeka kobomi bomntu, siyayiqonda ngokupheleleyo imfuneko yokuhlonela kunye nokunyamekela abantu abadala kuphela xa nathi siwela umda wokukhula. Umfanekiso wabantu asebekhulile abakhubazekile, ukuba ukhangelelene ngokugqithisileyo, ukhangeleka ukuba unemibala embi kwiingoma zaseRashiya: I-Baba Babarikh yasePushkin kunye noMdala omdala, abangazange banelisekile ngesitya esitsha sithobekileyo, kunye neKashchei engapheliyo, ngokukhawuleza apho umntu ongcwatyelwe khona kwihlabathi, Indoda endala ... Ngokukhethekileyo kwilizwe lethu, i-gerontophobia ngombono wokungafuni abantu abadala bayakhuthazwa kukuba ininzi yaseRashiya, ubudala bubuhlwempuzekileyo, kwaye akufuneki ukuphumla kwiindawo zokuhamba ngee-cruise (ngaphandle kweCaribbean iziqithi Kim, njengoko kunjalo kunye umhlalaphansi baseJamani kunye Japanese).
Injongo yokwenene
Kutheni isimo sengqondo kubantu asebekhulile kwinqanaba lekhaya sele lisanda kutshintsha? Isizathu senkqubela phambili. Ngaphambili - kwaye oko kwadlulayo iminyaka emininzi - kwakungumdala owayengummeli wobomi obunamathuba afanelekileyo ekusindisweni kwezizukulwana ezitsha. Babona ngexesha labo nemfazwe, belambile, kunye nazo zonke iintlobo zabantu. Ngaphezu kobomi bezizukulwana ezimbini okanye ezithathu zokugqibela, imeko iyatshintsha ngokukhawuleza. Ngoku ukuphumelela ebomini kuyimfuneko ukukhokelwa kwiindawo ezineminyaka engamashumi amabini ezedlulileyo azizange zikho kwaye amava aqokelelwa ngabantu abadala asehla phambi kwamehlo ethu. Nangona, ukuba ukhangelelene ngokukhawuleza kwixesha elingunaphakade, ixesha elingenamsebenzi njengoko ubuhlobo phakathi kwabantu, abakhulileyo besazi ngakumbi. Khumbula, njengoMarko Twain: "Xa ndandineminyaka elishumi elinamnye, ubaba wayenobulumko kangangokuthi andinakukuthwala; kodwa xa ndaphendukela ngamashumi mabini ananye, ndandimangaliswe ukuba le ndoda yayineminyaka engakanani ikhulile ngobudala kwiminyaka esixhenxe eyadlulayo. " Ukugqithiswa kobudala kunye nokuhlukana phakathi kwezizukulwana ngenxa yezinto ezininzi. Ubuncinane bobabini bahambelana nokutshintsha kwisakhiwo seentsapho kunye nolwalamano lwentsapho. Iyokuqala ukwanda kwithuba lokuphila. Ukukubeka nje, ikhulu leminyaka edlulileyo ukuxabana kwezizukulwana kwakungeke kuphuhliswe ngamandla, njengoko isizukulwana esidala saphinda sagula kwaye, kwintlalo yoluntu, "yakhulula indawo". Isimo sesibini: ukutshintshwa kwemfundo yokuqala yekhaya ngokuhlanganisana. Kuyaziwa ukuba kwiminyaka emithathu umntwana uncike kwi-100% kumama ngokomzwelo nangengqondo. Kwaye nangemva kwexesha leminyaka emithathu, ukuya ekufikeni komntwana, ukuthetha ngokuthe ngqo kunye nomama, iipatheni zokuziphatha, iindlela zokuphila ngokuxelisa kubaluleke kakhulu. Kodwa izizukulwana ezimbalwa zokugqibela zabazali zibeka abantwana babo kubafundisi abadibaniselwano - ababelethi. Abameleli besizukulwana sabantwana abaneminyaka engama-40 ukuya kuma-50 bahlala bexhoba lokukhulisa abafundi. Ngenxa yoko, baqala ukudibana noomama, kwaye bahluleka ukufaka ingqiqo yobunye bentsapho kubantwana baloo minyaka, xa kuyimfuneko: ukuya kwi-5 ukuya kweyisixhenxe. Ukubizela abantwana, nangaphezulu kwiimvakalelo zabazukulwana, xa inzala iphendukele ilishumi elinesihlanu, kwaye nangaphezulu-amathathu-ntlanu, ayinanto engenanto. Ngenxa yoko, ukuze unqobe i-gerontophobia kwimpembelelo yayo xa kufikelele ekungabikho kokungabikho komsebenzi kubantu abadala, kubalulekile ukuphinda uhlolisise ubudlelwane kunye nabantwana abancinci kwaye ubhekane nabo ngentlonipho efanayo kunye nokunyamekela oko ungathanda, ukuba kwiminyaka emininzi iza bakuphatha.
Ukunyamekelwa kwesikhumba ngexesha lokuguga kuyimfuneko kunye nokunyamekela ukubonakala kwayo - naye. Kodwa ukuba ufumane ixesha elide kwaye likhuselekile kuphela, kodwa liyimiphumo eluncedo, udinga indlela eyahlukileyo eya kwiseli yolusu. Esikhundleni sokumisa ngokukhawuleza iindawo zokuguga ze-epidermis, izimonyo kufuneka zenze konke ukunyusa ubomi babo. Khumbula, "isethi" nganye yeeseli yenzelwe iminyaka eyisixhenxe. Ukuba, ngoncedo olukhethiweyo, izilwanyana ezinobungakanani besikhumba, ukukunceda ulunye uhlalutyo luphila ngexesha elibiweyo (ngaphandle kokunyusa ixesha lobomi beeseli), ulutsha olujongene nalo luya kuthatha ubuncinane iminyaka elishumi nesiqingatha, okanye ngaphezulu. Ngenxa yolu njongo, ke, izithako zendalo zifanelekile, kuba ziphela kuphela ezikwazi ukondla, kwaye aziyi kudala ingcamango yokutya.
Intlawulo yokusetyenziswa kakubi
Ngokuziphatha kwengqondo kwaye, ukuba uthanda, iziphumo ze-karmic ze-phobia ezinxulumene neminyaka ("yonke into ibuyela, nendlela ophatha ngayo abantu abadala, ngoko kwiminyaka embalwa bayokuphatha") ingaphezulu okanye ingacacile. Kodwa iingxaki kule nto musa ukuyeka, kuba isigaba sesibini se-gerontophobia - ukwesaba ukuguga kwabo, nako-ke, kungaphumelela emacaleni okulwa kubutsha obungunaphakade. Ukuhlaziywa kokufakelwa kwimizi emibini "iminyango": ukuzisa emacaleni amacandelo amancinci ye-epidermis kunye nokucebisa imvelaphi ye-hormonal yomzimba. Yiyiphi eyona nto iqukunjelwa ngokuzilibazisa ngamahomoni kunye nokusetyenziswa okungalawulwayo kwazo zonke iintlobo ze-elixirs kunye neenkcazo zobutsha, oogqirha abanakuze baxelele, bekhumbula ngokugqithiseleyo ukuba ukusuka kwinqanaba leembalo ze-biology ngonaphakade kwiseli encinci ngumgca wesifo somhlaza. Isiphumo sokuqala siphumelele ngenxa yokuqhafaza okubalulekileyo: ukususela ebusweni buso buhlanjululwe (wena ngokwenene ukhumbule ukuba ukutshintsha - ukuguqulwa ngokuthi "ukucima"?) Ubuncwane obumayo besikhumba, ukusuka ngaphantsi bubukeka bubutsha, Enyanisweni, asisayi kuvuthwa kwaye ayikhuseli phambi kwendawo enobudlova. Ingxaki kukuba sinalo inani elincinci, elizuze ilifa leenqabana zesikhumba, okungukuthi, amahlanu. Umntu ngamnye phantsi kwemiqathango eqhelekileyo yenzelwe iminyaka eyisixhenxe, ukwenzela ukuba isetyenziswe sethu-sinomgama omkhulu, kangangokuba iikhilomitha ezintathu nesiqingatha, zingaphi omnye umntu owake waphila. Ukuba kanye emva kweenyanga ezintandathu ukwenza unzulu olunzulu, i-laser ivuselela, i-photobleaching - kwaye uqale kwi-30, emva koko ungamashumi amane anesihlanu ungasebenzisa zonke izixhobo zokuvuselela nokuvuselelwa. Kodwa emva kwayo yonke into, njengoko siqonda ngokukhawuleza, ukuhamba phambili kwinqanaba elithandayo, olukhangayo nolutsha olufuna ukukhangela kunye namashumi amahlanu anesihlanu, mhlawumbi ngaphezu kwamashumi amathathu! Ngoko, ukubeka nokubeka emnqamlezweni? Buyela kumaxesha awayekude, xa umfazi oneminyaka engamashumi amahlanu ubudala engaba ngumakhulukazi (kwiimeko ezimbi kakhulu - intombazana eselula) kwaye ngoko waziqonda? Akunjalo! Kuphela ukuba kufuneka uzinakekele ngokufanelekileyo, ungenakucinga kakhulu kwisiphumo "apha nangokunje nangayiphi na indlela" njengengqondo yefilosofi - oko kukuthi, inhlalakahle yomzimba wonke iminyaka ezayo.