Amadoda amaninzi akholelwa ukuba ubudlelwane obunjalo buyingcali-kuba phantse bonke abesifazana bafumana iiminqweno zesini zesimo esingafaniyo. Kodwa ngaba oko kuthetha ukuba akukho buhlobo phakathi kwendoda nomfazi? Okanye mhlawumbi uhlukile kumhlobo wesini?
Kukho inzululwazi - ingqondo yezobudlelwane. Uqwalasela iintlobo ezahlukahlukeneyo zobudlelwane babantu, kubandakanywa okona kunomdla kuthi-isondo.
Ubundlobongela bubhekisela kuyo nayiphi na ubudlelwane phakathi kwendoda nomfazi, apho ubulili bobudlelwane bomtshato nabo buba nemiba.
Oko kukuthi, nokuba ubudlelwane bezoshishino lunokuba ngesondo xa ukujonga komntu njengomqeshwa okanye umphathi udibaniswa nombono wakhe njengomntu ophethe ngesondo, i. amadoda okanye amabhinqa. Enyanisweni, le yindlela eqhelekileyo yobume bezoshishino phakathi kwendoda nomfazi. Kule meko, amaqabane kule ndlela yobudlelwane bezesondo ayinakwenzeka ukuba alele okanye alala kakhulu.
Ukususela kwimbono yale nzu lulwazi, ubuhlobo phakathi kwendoda nomfazi ngenye yezindlela ezincinci zobudlelwane bezesondo. Imbali yayo sihloko kwinqaku ekhethekileyo, siya kuqwalasela ingundoqo yayo.
Okokuqala, makhe sikhumbule ukuba lobu buhlobo bobulili obufanayo.
• Abahlobo baxubana nabanye ngokuba banomdla.
Banomdla kwinto enye okanye abanomdla ekwenzeni into kunye kunye: ukuqokelela izitampu, ukuxubusha iindidi, ukulwa ngamakrele, njl njl.
• Abahlobo bayathembana.
Abayikwesaba ukubonakalisa omnye nomnye "kwisaziso engafanelekanga", kuba bayazi ukuba umntu akayi kuhlazisa omnye. Ababhalelanga ngokwabo kwiincwadi zabo zokubhala okanye kwimemori ethengiweyo okanye ibhiya.
• Abahlobo abaqwalaselani "banyanzelekile".
Abayilungiselele izigcawu, ukuba umntu uququzelela iphathi okanye ibhola, kwaye omnye uthi akakwazi okanye akafuni ukuya kuyo. Okanye ukuba omnye utshele omnye ukuba akanakunceda nantoni na. Ayikwazi kwaye ayifuni - ilungelo lokuba omnye umhlobo uyazibona emva komnye.
• Abahlobo abanamona.
Impumelelo yomntu ayibe yintlungu yomnye. Ngaphezu koko, ngokuqhelekileyo abahlobo bayavuya ngokwenene ngempumelelo yomnye nomnye.
• Abahlobo baziva bexhunyiwe.
Abakwazi ukuchaza uhlobo loxhumano, kodwa yilokho okhokho bethu babibiza ngokuthi "izibophelelo". Olu lwalamano luhambelana nentsapho kunye nezivumelwano zomtshato, kodwa kuyahluke kuzo.
• Abahlobo banobomi obuhlukile.
Abathandi bacwangcisa ubomi babo kunye neliso omnye nomnye kunye nokubala "ukuhambelana." Abahlobo bahlala bodwa. Oku akuthethi ukuba abanako ukuvumelana ngento ethile.
• Abahlobo banxibelelana rhoqo.
Ukunxibelelana rhoqo kunokuxhasa uxhulumaniso lwabo. Ngaphandle koko, alas, iyalala.
Oku kuluhlobo lobudala, ubuhlobo bobulili obufanayo. Kwakunjalo ubuhlobo phakathi kwendoda kunye nomfazi, ngesinye imeko: enye okanye bobabini bafuna enye, kodwa ngenxa yesizathu esithile abayi kulala ngesondo. Into efana noPlaton uthando ...
Kuvela njani?
Umbhali S. Chekmayev kwincwadi ethi "Vesukha" ibhala ukuba xa indoda kunye nowesifazane beyazi ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba akukho nto iya kuba phakathi kwabo, ubuhlobo babo buba nethemba ngokuthe ngqo.
Okokuthi, ubuhlobo bobulili ngokwesini, njengendlela yobudlelwane bezesondo, kubakho xa umntu efuna ibhinqa, waqonda ukuba "akakhanyanga," kodwa wayenomdla kuye njengomntu ukuba wanqwenela ukunxibelelana ngokuqhelekileyo kunye wakhe. Kancinci, ukunxibelelana kule nxibelelwano kuyaqina, kwaye ubuhlobo nazo zonke iimpawu zalo zivela, kubandakanya "umhlobo uya kuhlala encedisa."
Kutheni na ukuba le ndoda yecala elisebenzayo?
Inyani kukuba abaninzi abafazi baxhomekeke ekubeni banandipha kuzo zonke iintlobo zonxibelelwano, ngoko ke ukuzonwabisa ngokuthetha nomntu njengomntu kubo kuqhelekileyo. Amadoda athathaka kakhulu kwiintlobo zentlalo yoluntu, kubandakanywa ubudlelwane bezesondo; bambalwa kakhulu abantu abanokuzonwabisa ngabo. Ukususela ekudaleni ubudlelwane obugcweleyo kufuna ukuba uthathe inxaxheba yamabini omabini, umfazi kufuneka alinde ngokukhawuleza, nokuba kukho indoda enomgangatho ochazwe ngasentla.
Into ephambili kukuba amaqela aqonde ukuba ukukhanga omnye komnye akuthethi ukuba angakwazi ukuba ngumhlobo. Ayikho into engaphenduliyo yendalo yendalo, inxalenye eyenza ubuhlobo bentsebenziswano ngesini esinye.
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