Ngaba uyazi ukuba zonke iingxabano zentsapho zinokuthi zichazwe nje, kwaye ezo ngxabano zingabangela iingxaki ezininzi kwiintsapho zakho zobomi. Iimbambano ezifana nokuphakama komntu, ukuzingca, ukunyanzelisa kunye nokungahambi nje kweemeko. Kubonakala kungenjalo, kodwa ndikholelwe, oku kwanele ukuba intsapho yakho iphumelele.
Ngoku siza kuqwalasela zonke iingxabano kwintsapho kwaye sizame ukuhlenga iintsapho ngezizathu zokuxabana, ukuze silondoloze ubomi bentsapho.
Kukho izibini ezonwabileyo ezihlala zifuna ukubonakalisa omnye komnye ukuba ziphosakeleyo kwaye akayena ohlakaniphile njengoko angathanda ukubonakala. Kwaye ngokuqhelekileyo kwimeko enjalo umlingane okanye umfazi ubonisa ukufaneleka kwabo, kodwa balahlekelwa uxolo kwintsapho.
Kwakhona kukho abantu abakwaziyo ukubonisa bonke abantu ukuba bangcono, kwaye bonke abanye abakwazi ukuma ngomnwe wabo omncinci. Oku kuziphatha ngendlela efana nolwalamano lwentsapho kuya kubakho nto. Ukongezelela kwabo, kukho abantu abajikelezile abaye bayaphawula oku kwaye banokuchaphazela ubudlelwane bomyeni nomkakhe. Iqabane okanye iqabane lalo hlobo lokuziphatha ngaphandle kokuqaphela, ukutshabalalisa ubomi babo bentsapho. Umntu makangacingi nje ngaye ngokwakhe, kodwa malunga nabantu abakujikelezile.
Ndiza kukuxelela ngelinye lam bahlobo bam abangazange baliphulaphule isiluleko somntu, kodwa uyathanda ukubanika ngokuzonwabisa okukhulu. Le ndlela yokuziphatha, xa kulula ukuthetha ngayo, ukungabikho kwengqondo kunye ne-blackmail, engabangela ingxabano kwintsapho.
Iingqungquthela zabo
Ngandlela-thile omnye umntu osisilumko wathi isiluleko kufuneka sinikwe abantu kuphela xa umntu ngokwakhe ekubuza yona. Kodwa ngokuphindaphindiweyo ngamaxesha onke abantu abazange bajonge lo mgaqo kwaye bawutyeshela. Abantu abaninzi abanqwenela ukunika iingcebiso abanakukuqonda ebomini babo, ngoko ke bazame ukufundisa wonke umntu indlela yokuphila kunye nendlela yokuziphatha kule nto okanye kuloo meko.
Phakathi kwababini, kuqheleke kakhulu ukuba ukuziphatha okunjalo kwenzeka xa bezama ukubulala omnye okanye omnye wabatshatileyo. Kwaye ke phakathi kwabatshatileyo baqala ukuxabana komtshato. Kwiingcebiso zeengqondo zengqondo, ukuthetha ngokuqhelekileyo nomnye nomnye, kungcono ukuba ungathinteli umnxibelelwano kwaye ungalokothi uphazamise intetho yakhe xa uthetha nawe okanye nomnye umntu.
Ngokuqhelekileyo abafazi bathanda ukufaka iintente zabo ezintlanu xa bethetha, xa abantu bethetha. Kodwa amadoda ayithandi ukudibana nomntu, ingakumbi umfazi, kuba ngaloo mzuzu uphazamisa ingcamango yakhe kwaye akamvumeli ukuba athele ingxoxo yakhe ekupheleni. Kwaye kutheni ingxabano ephakanyiswayo phakathi kwabatshatileyo. Khumbula abafazi abathandekayo, amadoda athande ukuzisa zonke iingxelo zabo ekupheleni. Ukuba ufuna ukubonisa uluvo lwakho, kungcono ukwenza oku emva kwentetho yabo okanye uthetha kamva malunga nale nto nomyeni wakho.
Icandelo eliphambili kwintsapho kufuneka libe ngenyanisekileyo. Ukuba akakho ebomini bentsapho yakho, ngoko uya kuhlala usolungelelana kunye nomona ungabonakala, kwaye unomona njengokuba uyayazi, nantoni na into enhle ayizange ikhoke. Ungaze uhlekise isiqingatha sakho sesibini. Emva kwakho konke, akubona wonke umntu onokukuqonda oku kwaye athathe njengenhlaya. Kwaye akunakwenzeka ukuba iqabane lakho lifuna ukuba lihlekisiwe, lingamkhathaza kakhulu, zama ukuhlonela iimvakalelo zabanye.
Ungalokothi utshintshe uxanduva oluvela kumntu omnye ukuya kwelinye. Kwaye ungahlale ukhumbuza umntu wezinye iinkalo ezingekho phantsi kwezinto ezenzekayo kwintsapho yakho. Unokubangela ukuziphatha okunjalo kumntu onobundlobongela nokuzingca.
Ngaba wayesazi ukuba igama lobugwenxa, ukusuka kwisiLatini, liguqulelwe njengehlaselo. Kwaye umntu onobudlova uqala ukuhlasela wonke umntu ngaphandle kwesizathu. Kubantu abanjalo, ukuhlaselwa komntu kuba yindlela yobomi bentsapho, kunye nendlela yokuphila. Ngokuqhelekileyo abantu abanjalo babizwa ngokuba ngumbhobho wesibhamu, baxhamla ngokukhawuleza kunye nokuxabana kwabo, aba bahlala bexhamla ubomi. Ngabantu abanjalo, kuya kuba nzima kuwe ukuba ugweme ukuxabana kwintsapho.
Ungasindisa njani intsapho kwaye uphephe ukuxabana kwintsapho? Okokuqala, zama ukuthetha nomlingane wakho ngokunyanisekileyo nangokunyaniseka. Zama ukukhumbula indlela owasebenzisa ngayo kakuhle kunye nendlela oqondana kakuhle ngayo. Zama, ubonise ubulumko kwaye mhlawumbi zonke iimpikiswano zakho nokungaqondani kuya kukugqitha.
Kukho abantu abaninzi abazigwenxa abazigxila kuphela. Abantu abanjalo bazama ukufezekisa yonke into yabo kuphela kwaye abanakuqonda ukuba kutheni kungekho mntu uyaziqonda. Kwaye kwakhona kukho ukuxabana rhoqo kwintsapho, ekhokelela ubudlelwane beentsapho kunye nomtshato.
Ukuba umntu obathandayo ungumntu onobudlova, zama ukungaxabani naye kwaye ungabonakali nantoni kuye. Kufuneka uxolelane nomntu onjalo kwaye unqamle iqela lakhe elibi, okanye ukungqubuzana kobudlelwane bakho akuyikuphela.
Siyathemba ukuba emva kweengcebiso zethu, uyazi ukuba unako ukuphepha iingxabano kwintsapho kwaye uya kukwazi ukugcina ubomi bakho bentsapho. Umonde omkhulu kunye nomonde kuphela!