Ngokuphathelele ukuba umtshato usithintela kangakanani umtshato, kukho inani elikhulu leengcamango. Ngako oko, ngaphambi kokuba utshate kwaye ngakumbi xa ulala, kufuneka ucinge ngamancinci amaxesha angama-10.
Iingxaki zesehlukaniso
Iintlobo eziphambili zempatho yokuqhawula umtshato kumtshato zixhomekeka kwiimeko ezibangele ukuqhawula umtshato:
- Isimo sengqondo sokuqhawula umtshato ngabafazi (abangathathi hlangothi, ababi, ababuhlungu);
- Iimpawu zokwahlukana, umzekelo, ukuma kwayo, ubunzulu, ixesha, inani labathathi-nxaxheba abandakanyekayo kwinkqubo yomtshato (abahlobo, abathandi, abazali, abantwana);
- Icandelo lezinto eziphathekayo kunye nokwahlula kwipropati ngexesha loqhawulo-mtshato (ingxaki yokuhlukanisa indawo yokuhlala);
- Impembelelo yemigaqo yokuziphatha (impilo yomnye wabalingani, isimo sengqondo, ubudala, ingxaki yokuba ngubani oza kuba nabantwana).
Impembelelo kwabatshatileyo ngokubhekiselele kwisondo esingalinganiyo
Kwakuthatyathwa ukuba inkokheli enzima kunzima ukuhlala kwisiqhawulo somtshato, ngokungafani nendoda. Oku kungenxa yokuba kunzima kunenekazi ukuba akhulise umntwana omnye, afumane umsebenzi ngemali eyaneleyo, ukudala intsapho entsha, njl. Kodwa ngokuhamba kwexesha, izazi zeengqondo zafika kwimbono ebonisa ukuba indoda idinga intsapho ngaphezu komfazi.
Indoda emva kokuqhawula umtshato inethuba eliphezulu lokutshata kwakhona, kodwa abameli abaqhawule ngokuqhawula ngesondo abanamandla abanokufumana umhlobo omtsha. Iimpembelelo zenkqubo yokuqhawula umtshato ziyanciphisa kakhulu uhlahlo lwabiwo-mali, ngaphezu koko, indoda ibona umonakalo omkhulu wokuziphatha ochaphazelekayo noxinzelelo ngenxa yokuba akakwazi ukubona abantwana. Emva kokulahlekelwa indima yakhe emva kokuqhawula umtshato, loo ndoda uzama ukungabonakali ngamava akhe kwaye nokuba wayiqalile umtshato, uhlala ehlaselwa. Konke oku kuxhomekeke kubude bombuso emtshatweni kunye neqondo lokukhetha ukulawula ngexesha lokushiya le nxaxheba.
Ibhinqa kwixesha elinjalo liqala ukuvakalelwa ngokungenalo uthando kunye nokuzigxeka. Ubhekene neengxaki zengqondo ngakumbi ngokunyanisekileyo, kodwa ngokukhawuleza kuza kwi-balance balance. Ngendlela, ngokwemigqaliselo yentlalo, abafazi abaqhawulekileyo banesimo esincinane sezenhlalakahle kunomfazi otshatileyo. Phakathi kwezinye izinto, ekuqaleni ukuvala abantu baqala ukuxhasa unkosikazi, kwaye ke baya kuzidela kuyo, okwandisa ukuziva unesizungu kwaye kunokubangela ukudandatheka.
Le ndoda, ngokukhawuleza, ivale ngaphakathi kwayo, ibe "isuke" inomdla wokunganeliseki ixesha elide. Amadoda athambekele ekubeni namathuba amaninzi okuzilibala ngokwawo (ukuzonwabisa, utshwala, imidlalo). Ngokuqhelekileyo, "ukuphunyuka kwakho" kungadonsa. Ngamanye amazwi, ubunzulu bonke bemiphumo yokuqhawula umtshato baxhomekeke kungalindelekanga kwenkqubo. Lowo owanikezelwa ukuqhawula umtshato ufumana ukulimala okukhulu.
Iimbono ezintsha ebomini
Kuba ngabayeni basesidlangalaleni kuyimpawu yokungaziboni indima ebalulekileyo kwimpikiswano, ukulahla zonke iimeko. Kodwa kuninzi okwaneleyo kwaye ukwazi ukuvavanya imeko imeko yabantu benza izigqibo ezilungileyo kwiingxaki zangaphambili kunye nokuziphatha emtshatweni wesibili, ukuba kwenzeka, ngobuchule nangengqiqo.
Amadoda, emtshatweni wokuqala owayenomfazi okhutheleyo, ohlala efuna uninzi, ukuba umtshato wesibini, njengomthetho, ukhethe umlingane ozolileyo kwaye othobekileyo. Okanye, loo madoda awathatyathwe ngumfazi ogxininisa kakhulu, ngenxa yokulondolozwa rhoqo kunye nomvakalelo onjengomntwana, uya kukhetha loo ntokazi njengomfazi omtsha oswelekile ngengqondo aze afune ukunyamekela nokunyamekela. Oku kuya kumvumela umntu ukuba azive ekhulile aze ahlakulele ngokwabo umthwalo wemfanelo, awawungekho ngaphambili.
Izinzuzo zokungena emtshatweni omtsha zisekelwe kwinto yokuba ngaphantsi kweempembelelo ezenzekayo, bobabini abatshatileyo abangekho basebenziseni ubudlelwane babo "nothando olungunaphakade" kunye nokuthandana, kwaye baqonda yonke into engakumbi. Ngendlela, ekhumbula yonke inzondo yokuba isigqibo somtshato wokuqala sakhupha, bobabini umfazi kunye nendoda baxabisa kakhulu zonke iimeko ezilungileyo abaza kunika umtshato wesibili. Ngako oko, bazama ukuyigcina ngokuzeleyo kwaye baneliseko olupheleleyo kuyo.