Kwaye kuphela, ngenxa yesizathu esithile, ingqiqo yenziwe ukuba ayibonakaliyo, ingqungquthela eqinile, engabikho mntu. Kwaye ukudibanisa izinto ezintle azizange zenze umfanekiso wesitayela. Kwaye ndandicinga ngendlela yokufundisa umfana ukuba agqoke kakuhle kunye nesitayela.
Ekuqaleni, kwafuneka ndifumanise oko ndandifuna. Emva koko, ubuhle kunye nesitayela akufani. Kwiphepha lamaphephancwadi amafashini kunye neenkampu zemihlaba emikhulu yefestile, kukho imifanekiso emihle kakhulu. Kodwa isitala ibonakala, okanye ingabonakali, xa iimpahla ezivela kwisiteji zihamba ebomini. Ngako oko, isitayela ichazwa ngokubhaliweyo kwendlela ebonakalayo, ngokucacileyo ngumntu ngamnye.
Ukukwazi ukugqoka kakuhle kwaye isitayela sisisakhono esifanele sifunde. Uhlobo lungaba nebala elihle, ukukwazi ukwahlula phakathi kwezinto ezintle, kodwa ukwazi ukukhetha kwizinto ezilungileyo kukuzibakho, ezivela kwiqela elikhethiweyo, eliya kudibana nawe-umcimbi wamava, ukuqhuba nokufuna okungapheliyo. Oku kuchaza ukuba kulula ukudibana nendoda okanye umfazi ogqobileyo phakathi kwabantu abantu abadala kunabantu abaselula. Kule minyaka, ukuzithemba kuza, loo mntu uyazi ukuba ngubani, into ayifunayo, kwaye yintoni ehlehliswa ngumfanekiso wakhe.
Oku akuthethi ukuba akunakwenzeka ukuqeqesha umntwana osemtsha. Yaye inkqubo yokufunda ayifani nenye na.
Ingqiqo yobuhle, isitala kunye nokucoceka, ngaphandle kwayo nayiphi na ubuhle obonakalayo, ukuxhaswa kwintsapho. Ukususela esemncinci, umntwana kufuneka abe mhlophe, ahlambuluke, iimpahla zifanele zivumelaniswe nombala, isakhiwo sobumba, ukudala ukudibanisa. Ukuba umntwana ugqoke ngokuzenzekelayo kwizinto zokulala ezivela ngasentla, ingakhangeli ngokukodwa i-sweater kwi-panties okanye kungenjalo, ukubonakalisa kwilutsha elilandelayo ukuba akunakwenzeka ukugqoka okunjalo, akuyi kuba lula kakhulu. Njengokuba kukho konke, unokuphinda ufundise ukuziphatha ngokuphindaphindiweyo ngamawaka, kodwa ukuba awuhambanga nemigaqo echaziweyo ngokwakho, akuyi kubakho ukuqonda kwisakhiwo esinjalo. Abantwana bafunda yonke into ngamava okanye nangona bazali babo. Ngoko ke, isona sifundo esona sifaneleko sokufundisa umfana ukuba agqoke kakuhle kunye nesitayela, onokumfundisa-ukuba ngumzekelo. Vumelana, isifundo esihle.
Xa sele eselula, abantwana "banokungabinakunceda." Bafuna ukuzichasa kubantu abadala, ukubonisa ukuzimela kwabo kunye nokufaneleka. Ukufezekisa ezi njongo, zonke iindlela, kuquka ukubonakala, zisetyenziselwa ngaphandle. Eyaziwayo ngokubeka into engacatshangelwayo kulula kakhulu kunokuba zizenzo kunye nezakhono ezizodwa, ngokuqhelekileyo abantwana bakhetha isitayela esingavamile. Abanye abazali abawuthathi ngokungathandabuzeki ukubonakala kobantwana, abanye, banokuzikhusela ngakumbi, baxhathise ngamandla iinzame zokuzibonakalisa. Ezi zombini iindlela aziyi kuvelisa iziphumo ezilungileyo. Ukunganakwa kuya kufundisa nantoni na, kwaye ukugatywa kuya kuqinisa kuphela umnqweno wokumelana.
Indlela efanelekileyo kukuzama ukuqonda ulutsha. Enyanisweni, imizekelo emininzi yolutsha imnandi kakhulu, ingaqhelekanga kwaye ifanelekile. Emva kokudlala ebusheni, ukuba azame kwiindlela ezahlukeneyo kunye nezikhombisi-ndlela, ukuya kwiindlela ezigqithiseleyo zobuncwane bentsha (emo, punks, metalheads, goths), kuya kuba lula kumntwana oselula ukuba eze kwi-middle middle gold. Kwaye ungayifumana njani enye into okanye ungayifumani, ngaphandle kokuzama, ungazami kwaye ungaziveleli.
Chaza umntwana ukuba, ukuxelisa nokufuna ukufumana into, njengabantu bonke, uba yingxenye yesihlwele, ulahlekelwe ngumntu wakhe. Kodwa ungagxininisi ngokwakho, ukuba umntwana uhlala ehambelana. Kule minyaka, ukuba yingxenye yesihlwele kupholile. Ulunge kunye kunye, ube nesithakazelo kwizinto ezintsha ezenziwa yintambo yefestile, uxoxe ngazo, uthathe uhambo oluthile lokuthengwa, unike umntwana ukuba akhethe, kodwa uchaze indlela ukhetho lwakho lungcono ngayo okanye lungcono. Emva koko, baxelisa abazali, nangona bengenakuze bazivumele bona nantoni na.
Kukude kukungabonakali nje ukujoyina isiko. Ubugcisa obuhle, umculo, i-theater ifom yehlabathi kunye nokunambitha. Ukutyelela iimyuziyam kunye nemibukiso, uye kwi-cinema, xubusha ndawonye into oyibonile.
I-media media, i-intanethi, ithelevishini ininzi ngolwazi malunga nefashoni nendlela yokugqoka kakuhle. Thenga amaphephancwadi olutsha. Bobabini intombazana kunye nabantu abaselula bayifunda ngokubetha kwaye balandela icebiso. Gcwalisa ingqondo yeselula ngolwazi olufanelekileyo. Ukuba awuxeleli okanye ugxininise nayiphi na inkcubeko ngesambatho, umfana uya kuba neengcamango. Kuza kuyifaka isitalato, kunye nayo ayiyiyo imifanekiso engumzekelo.
Nangona kunjalo, isitayela sidalwe ngama-accents, i-trivia kunye nezixhobo. Abazali, obuntwaneni babo bebaleka ngexesha le-uniform yesikolo esifanayo, babhekisela kwiingubo zesikhumbuzo. Eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu kwaye iyasebenza. Bakufumanisa kunzima ukuqonda imfuno yazo zonke iintlobo zeenubles, iidkski, izikhwabanini kunye neeninzi zokugqoka iingubo. Kodwa zama ukuqonda ukuba kuyimfuneko. Akukho imfuneko yokuzibandakanya kuyo yonke into, kodwa nawuphi na umntwana osemtsha kufuneka abe nomncinci "ukumkanikazi".
Bulisa, ukuba ubona ukuba umntwana wenza into ethile. Mkhuthaze, ungashiyikanga ungabonakali esinye isibonakaliso esitsha. Musa nje ukumemeza: "Thatha ngokukhawuleza!" Zama ukucacisa ukuba kutheni umhlobo ono umntwana wakho ufuna ukuwuhambisa. Kwimbambano (kungekhona kwingxabano!) Inyaniso iyazalwa. Emva kokuxoxisana nawe ngokukhethekileyo kwindlela obonakala ngayo, ukuphulaphula izimvo zakho zobuqili, kunokwenzeka ukuba uluvo lwentombazana malunga nokubonakala kwakhe okugculelayo kuya kutshintsha. Kwaye ngokuzayo uza kugqoka ngendlela eyahlukileyo.
Ingqalelo kunye nomonde. Njengoko uyakubona, iyafana nakuzo zonke ezinye izazinzululwazi.