Ngokuqhelekileyo kunokungaqiniseki, ukungaqiniseki kuvela kwi-self-esteem. Ngaphezulu, ndiya kunika iingcebiso malunga nendlela yokuphucula ngayo.
Okokuqala, soloko uzama ukufunda into entsha, ukufunda into. Unokuqala ukufunda isiJapane, ungafunda ukukhwela okanye ufunde iimfihlelo zobugcisa bokutya, kodwa awuyidingi kumntu, kodwa wena. Umntu ophila ubomi obonwabisayo unomdla kwabanye.
Zithande. Zibandakanyeke ezemidlalo, yenza inqaku kwisibini, unyawo lwakho luhamba ngomzimba wakho kwi tonus. Kwaye akunandaba nokuba unobhantshi obunqamlekileyo okanye i-brunette egcweleyo, wonke umntu unokufumana ukhetho olwamkelekileyo lokuphila okusebenzayo. Unokutshintsha iinwele zakho, ubuyekeze ikhabethe yakho, yenza umququzelelo. Njengawe nabanye, nawe uthanda.
Phawula yonke into enhle eyenzekayo kuwe. Ungakwazi nokuqala ukugcina idayari yeziganeko ezilungileyo. Ungazigxeka ngokuphindaphindiweyo, sonke senza iimpazamo, into eyona nto kukuthatha izigqibo ezilungileyo kubo. Ungazixolisi, ungaziboni ubuthathaka, ngoko kwabanye awuyi kubangela iimvakalelo. Kufuneka uhlonishwe, kungekhona uxolo.
Tune kwi-positive. Ubomi buhle kwaye buyamangalisa, buzele izinto ezinzima. Cinga ngezinto ezilungileyo ezinokuthi zenzeke kuwe kunye neengcamango zakho ziya kusebenza, kwaye zikhokele ubomi bakho ngendlela efanelekileyo.
Ungazifanisi nomntu. Umntu ngamnye ngumntu omnye kwaye omnye unokuba neentsilelo, ongayikrokreli. Unokuziqhathanisa nawe ngokwakho, ukuba ungubani kwaye ube yintoni. Ukuba awuyithandi le mzekelo, kufuneka uguqule into ethile.
Unako inja okanye ikati. Baya kukuthanda nantoni na, naphezu kweempazamo. Kwaye xa umntu ethanda wena nje ngokuba ungubani, kulula kwaye uqinisekile ngakumbi ekuthandeni abanye.
Musa ukoyika ubunzima. Ukuyithintela, siyazinqoba. Kwaye ngokwenza oku sikhulisa ukuzithemba kwethu. Icandelo ngalinye, apho uyenza khona, ufike ekupheleni. Yaye ukuba uthe wagqiba ukwenza into, ungayigxothi ixesha elide.
Ukuba ucinga kusengaphambili ukuba wenzeni, kodwa, nangona kunjalo, ukuba umhlobo wakho uphosayo, uyayeka ukuyikwesaba, kuba uya kubona ukuba ubomi abupheli apho.
Kodwa ngenxa yoko kuyimfuneko ukuba ube nobomi bakho, iimfuno zakho kunye nezinto zokuzilibazisa. Ukuba nithandana, oku akuthethi ukuba kufuneka ube kunye namahora angamashumi amabini anesine ngosuku. Vumela ukuba uye kwi-cafe kunye nabahlobo ngenkobe yekhofi, ngaphandle kwendodana yakho, inika inkululeko.
Bathi awudingi ukugcina umthandayo ngomfutho omfutshane, ukuba awufuni ukulahlekelwa nguye, kuba ufuna ukushiya. Ngaloo nto bayakulibala ukucacisa ukuba le ngxaki udibanisa kuyo kwaye ufutshane, ulungele ngakumbi ukuba ngaba ulwalamano aluhlali.
Hlalani, ngokuba yena uhlala ephethe umqhina, incwadi engafundiwe, kwaye uya kufuna ukwazi wena ngcono. Mangaliswe kuye, kwaye akayi kukukhathaza. Yiba yinto eyahlukileyo, kwaye kuya kuba mnandi kuwe. Umntu opheleleyo kwaye omele ukwanako, uya kuba mnandi kwabanye kunye nomntu obathandayo ngokukodwa.
Umntu kufuneka kuqala okokuthanda ngokwakhe. Oku akuthethi ukuba kufuneka abe yinto yokuzingca, kodwa ukuba awukwazi ukuzithandayo, awuyi kuba nako ukuthanda omnye umntu. Thembela wena, kholosa intanda yakho. Ngokusoloko beyika ukungathembeki. Yaye unoba luhlobo luni luthando xa unokungathandabuzana.
Ngoko ke, ziphi izigqibo eziza kutsalwa?
Ungamyeka njani ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa ngumthandayo? Uloyiko lubangelwa ukungathembeki nokungaqiniseki. Ukungathembeki kukuphela kwento yokholo, ukuba ayikho kwaye ungathandabuzeki ukhetho lwakho, mhlawumbi awudingi olu dlelwane. Kwaye kungenakuqinisekiswa kubalulekile ukulwa, okokuqala kukuphakamisa ukuqikelela. Kholelwa kuwe, into yokuba uyingqayizivele, imangalisayo kwaye unokuthile okuthandayo. Zithande ngokwakho, zithande ukuba ungubani, kunye nazo zonke iingeniso kunye nezibi kwaye uya kuthandwa ngabanye. Ungazibopheli ngokwesaba, kunokutshatyalalisa ubuhlobo bakho kuphela. Yiba ngumntu opheleleyo, uyithemba kwaye awuyi kuyika ingomso, kodwa uya kukhangela ngekamva kwikamva.