Ubomi bomntu wonke uneminyaka emininzi. Sifunda, sithandane, sakha ubudlelwane kunye nenkxaso yethu "yintsapho" ubudlelwane phakathi kweentsapho nezizukulwana ezininzi. Kodwa imodeli yeklasi yobomi "ulutsha - ulutsha - ebantwini-intsapho yobudala" ifanelekile kuphela kubantu. Umfazi unengqondo yakhe yeminyaka, kunye nesigaba ngasinye kwisigidi sokuphila sakhe esipheleleyo, inkqubo yokuphuhlisa incike kwiimeko ezininzi.
Ukuphuhliswa kwabasetyhini kunye nokuhamba kweendidi zobomi ezahlukeneyo, imijikelezo, iphela ngokungqongqo ngokubhekiselele kwimpilo yakhe ephambili, kwaye ingqondo yakhe yeminyaka ibonakalisa ithemba lakhe kunye neenjongo zakhe. Ibhinqa linamathuba amaninzi "okhethekileyo", achaze imida ngokucacileyo.
Kukho unyaka-sixhenxe, umgca wobomi obulungekileyo obunzima obunokuqulunqwa komntu, ukuxelela ezininzi malunga nobudala bomfazi. "Ubalo" bakhe bubangelwa kwiinkcubeko ezahlukeneyo. Kodwa enye into efanayo - ukuba inombolo "imilingo" yesisixhenxe ibonisa imida yeminyaka kakhulu.
- Uneminyaka engama-7 ubudala ngumntwana ,
- Ukufika kwi-14 - intombazana ,
- Ukufika kwi-21 - intombazana ,
- Kuze kube ngu-28 - umkhosi ,
- Ukufika kumama - 35,
- Ukufika ku-42 - umfazi ,
- Ukufika ku-49 - ibhinqa ,
- Ku-56 nangaphezulu kwayo ubulumko ngokwalo .
Ukongezelela, abanye bathi imjikelezo iphindaphindiwe, ngelixa abanye bathi ngeminyaka engama-56 ibhinqa lifunde i-wisdom engaphezulu kwaye ingaba "yindoda endala kunazo zonke", ngezwi leNdalo ngokwaso okanye cha. Kwaye makhe sixoxe ngeengqondo zenkcubeko yabasetyhini kunye nomjikelezo opheleleyo wobomi bokuphuhliswa komntu okungaphezulu.
Kuphela ukususela kwiminyaka yesisixhenxe , intombazana encinci "engaswelekanga" iyaba intombazana, ivakalelwa kukuba yowesini isini, nangona iingcamango zokuqala malunga nezibonakaliso ezibonakalayo "zenye" zibekwe kwiminyaka emi-5. Kwaye kunye ne-14 - ingqiqo yeengcinga zabo zokomoya, lixesha lokuthandana kunye nokuvela kweemvakalelo ezinamandla.
Ukususela kwiminyaka engama-21 iqala ixesha elitsha. Intombazana eyayiqala ukuba nemizwa yakhe yokuqala nokufunda ihlabathi langaphakathi liba nomdla kwihlabathi langaphandle. U-Diane-hunter, umlwi, ezama isandla sakhe ehlabathini lokwenene kwaye unomdla kwizinto ezizenzekelayo - le ntombazana engaphantsi kweminyaka engama-28 ubudala. Impumelelo yokuqala ivuselela, amanxeba okuqala anokukwenza ucinge.
Kwaye ngoku, kwiminyaka engama-28 ubudala le ntombazana ihamba nempahla eqinile yolwazi. Kwaye nokuba wayeneminyaka engama-20 ubudala, ngoko ke, ngokwemigangatho yesigulo seengqondo, kuphela kwi-28 ubudala intombazana ifika kumama okhulileyo kunye novelisayo-lo ngumjikelezo wobomi bomntu. Kwale nto kukho into echanekileyo ngokufanelekileyo-kuphela ekufumaneni ulwazi, kunokwenzeka ukuba udlulisele into ebalulekileyo kwisizukulwana esilandelayo.
Ukufika ku- 35 ibhinqa inandipha ulonwabo lolunina kunye nokwakhiwa "kwindlovu", ucoceko, indlela yokuphila kunye "neseluntle kuluntu". Kodwa ekuza kusondele kwinqanaba elilandelayo, ufumanisa ukuba kukho nezinye izinto ezinomdla. Yaye yonke into yangaphambili - intsapho, ikhaya, isisigxina kunye nococeko kakhulu umsebenzi - yayisigobolondo elikhuselekileyo, emva koko kwakunokwenzeka ukufihla ubunzima kunye nokubandakanyeka kwindalo engumfazi - ukuzalwa nokukhuliswa kwabantwana.
Kubudala be- 35-42 ukuba abafazi bahlaziya isimo sabo sezenhlalakahle, batshintshe indawo yabo yomsebenzi kunye neentsapho zabo-kakhulu kakhulu ngeli xesha livakalelwa kukuba konke kufuneke kwenziwe ngokutsha. Kwaye ngokukhethekileyo-indlela efanelekileyo, kuba awuyi kuba nexesha lokutshintsha ...
Ngama-42-47 iminyaka, ibhinqa liyancipha kwedwa kunye nesimo "soqhawulo-mtshato," okanye sele seyithemba kwintsapho yakhe. Kulo nyaka unomxholo othi "umfazi" usebenza kakhulu - uqiniseke ukuba ungubani, into enokukwazi ngayo kunye nezinye izinto ezininzi. Okulungileyo kuba ngakumbi nangakumbi, amandla angqondo kunye namathuba - kwakhona, kodwa ukuphela komzimba akukavakalelwa. Ekupheleni kweli xesha, umfazi ekugqibeleni uyazibuza umbuzo we-sacramental "Ndingubani na," "kutheni ndilapha," "ukusuka phi" ...
Kwaye ngoku akuyona imibuzo engabonakaliyo abafana abaselula okanye abakhukhukazi abanokuzibetha ihlabathi bazibuze - lo luhambo oluyinyaniso. Ekugqibeleni ujonge kwintlango evulekileyo phambi komntu wonke. Le ncoko kunye nexesha elingapheliyo lithembisa ukubuyela kwiminqweno kunye nokuphila ubomi babantwana, abazukulu, abazukulu-bakhulu ... okanye ubulumko bokwenene, ekugqibeleni kuya kwiminyaka engama-56 .
Nayiphi na ingqondo yengqondo, umjikelezo opheleleyo wobomi bokuphuhliswa komntu ukususela ekuqaleni ukuya kobukumkani obungapheliyo, ngokuqinisekileyo, unemiqathango. Unendawo kunye neentlukwano kwiminyaka engama-2-3, kunye nokuphambuka kwangempela - xa lo okanye lowo mntu 'ehlangene' kwelinye iqanaba okanye ngokukhawuleza ubuyela kwinqanaba elidlulileyo lomjikelezo. Kodwa nawuphi na "ukungavumelani" kwanomjikelezo wobomi obunemiqathango ukhangeleka kakhulu.
Ubutsha "ubuhle obubulalayo" kwiminyaka engama-45 ukuya kwengu-50, ukujonga amehlo njengentombazana yehlabathi, nolwazi olungaphaya komhla, umama omncinci ugawula izandla, unike iingcebiso, engenalo ubulumko obaneleyo-eziyinkimbinkimbi ngokuqonda. Yaye makungaboni kakuhle, ungayiqondi isizathu, kodwa ezinye ziphazamiseke-njani? Ngako-ke musa ukuziphosa, ukhule njengoko ufuna umphefumlo. Emva kwakho konke, akukho mntu uya kuphila ubomi bakho ngenxa yakho - okanye izihlobo okanye abahlobo, okanye "uluntu".