Abasetyhini abaninzi bahlala bodwa, nangona bafuna ukwakha ubuhlobo obusondeleyo kunye nokwakha intsapho. Nangona kukho abathile abathi bangaboni umtshato. Kukho nawuphi na, xa ungenayo iqabane, lithetha - awufuni ukuba livele, liyazi okanye lingaqondi. Cinga ngezizathu ezi-11 zokuba kutheni abesetyhini bodwa.
1. Umsebenzi kunye noMsebenzi
Luhlobo luni lomfazi onqwenela ukuba naye rhoqo kunye nomntu? Nguye kuphela ongaziyo okwangakanani na onokuzifeza. Nangona kunjalo, le nkosikazi kwisithuba senkosi sele iqaphele ukuba inokuzibonela yona, kwaye ukutshata ubuhenyu beqabane lomntu wesondo akuyimfuneko kwaye ukhetha ukuzinika ixesha lakhe ukusebenza.
Yonke into elula kwaye iyaqondakala kumsebenzi: isebenze inyanga, ihlawulwe umvuzo awunanto encinci, ibuye yanike i-premium, yinto yonke-ibhinqa inikwe yonke into eyimfuneko evela kwimveliso ukuya kwiinkcukacha ezahlukeneyo. Ukuba awunayo yonke into emsebenzini, ngoko unokuthi "ngokuba ndiyindoda," kwaye awuyi kugwetywa njengendoda kwindawo efanayo. Ukuwa kwezoshishino akuyona into ebalulekileyo njengokonakala komntu wonke, kuba kulula ukubalekela ukusebenza.
2. Bonke abantu banxilisayo kunye neengxaki
Abanye besetyhini bathi namhlanje akukho mzhchin eqhelekileyo: okanye izidakwa, okanye iibhokhwe, okanye sele sele zineentsapho zabo kwaye akukho nanye injongo yokujonga indoda elungileyo. Ngoko watsho ugogo nomama, le nkqubo ixhomekeke kakhulu kwingqondo kwaye isebenze ubomi bonke. Nangona ucinga ukuba kunjalo, ihlabathi elikujikelezayo liya kuba ngabantu abanjalo, kwaye awunakuzazaza malunga nokufaneleka kwakho. Ukuze uhlale unesizungu, kulungele ukujonga ubunqongophala obuninzi kuwo wonke umntu odibana naye, kwaye uthethe ngawo, kwaye ulunwabo luya kuhlala ixesha elide. Ufuna oku?
3. Isithuba somntu
Ulwalamano lwentsapho akukho mfuneko, ukuba usetyenzisiweyo kwimeko yakho yemihla ngemihla kunye nesithuba sakho somntu. Emva koko, ukudala indawo efana nomntu, kulungile ukuguqula, ukukwazi ukuthetha, ukufunda ukuthetha ngeminqweno yakho, nokunyamekela, iimfuno zayo. Nangona kunjalo, le nto yonke ingxaki, kutheni umzamo omkhulu kangaka, ukuba uyazi amava abahlobo abatshatileyo ukuba konke oku kunzima ukuzigweba. Amadoda alunganga, aphosa amasokisi kwaye ahlambululi emva kwabo, kunzima kubo ukuba bahlaziye itompu okanye i-rosette, njl. Hayi, kungcono ukugcina induduzo yakho kwaye ungayi kuphinda uphinde uxhawule.
4. Ukwaneliseka kwezifiso
Ibhinqa ilindele ukuba ngokukhawuleza xa edibana nesiqingatha sesibini, uya kuba nolonwabo ngakumbi ebomini bakhe, ekubeni indoda yakhe iyimfuneko yokwanelisa iimfuno ezahlukeneyo. Kodwa ngenxa yesizathu esithile, kuhlala kukumangalisa, xa kulungele wena kunye nendoda (naye ufuna ukuthandwa). Kule meko, iimeko ezimbini kuphela ezibonakalayo. Iyokuqala xa emva kwexesha elihle leentyatyambo ezikhanyisa ukuba ngaba bobabili ni-egoists abafuna ulonwabo kumlingane (shi), abangafuni ukunikela nantoni na. Okwesibini yinto apho umfazi eyazi ngaphambili ukuba kufuneka anike ulwalamano lwakhe kwaye uyaqonda ukuba akayilungele ukusebenzisana okunjalo. Ukhetha ukuhlala enesizungu aze aphile kuphela yena, ngaphandle kokunyamekela indlebe zakhe.
5. Ukuzithoba kwezona zinto kubangelwa yedwa
Esinye isizathu sokuba uhlale wedwa kukuzicingela ukuba zimbi, ziqine, njalo njalo. Oku kulungeleka, kuba kunokwenzeka ukuba ufumane umculi (umama, utata, izakhi zofuzo, umbane), oko kuthetha ukuba akuxhomekeke kulo mfazi. Kwakhona kulula kakhulu ukuba ungonwabi, kuba kuya kuhlala kukho umntu onomusa oya kuzisola, ukufudumala ngokufudumala kwaye mhlawumbi uhlale emthandweni. Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba abo baxolisayo, abayithandiyo, bakhawuleza ukulibala, kuba bazisa ukukhathazeka okuthile. Ngoko ke, "ungatshintshi into ethile kwaye ube yinto enhle, inomdla, kuba ukuze uhlale ungumntu omnye, kwanele ukuba ube nexabiso eliphantsi, ukuba ungonwabi.
6. Inkosana emhlophe
Ngokuqhelekileyo umfazi ulindele ukuba uya kudibana nekosana efanayo yenkcazelo yamanqaku - into efanelekileyo kunye nomda wazo onke amaphupha akhe. Emva koko, sele sele enezintlu ezininzi zeempawu zakhe ezilungileyo kunye nedatha yangaphandle. Kodwa ayibonakali kwinqanaba. Yaye inyaniso kukuba uzijonga njengomntu onobuhle kunye nomntu kunye nawe kuphela. Ungamvumela njani umntu ebomini bakho ohlala ehamba ngokuzayo, owaziyo iimpazamo zakho, ngubani owaziyo ukuthetha ngabo ngomzuzu ongafanelekanga? Yivume, awufuni ukulahlekelwa isithsaba sakho, akunjalo? Ngako-ke linda isikhulu esinokuthi, yonke imizuzu eyi-10 ibonakala sengathi uyithandana nesibuko, kwaye isithsaba sayo sinjani na?
7. Inkcitho yexesha
Vala ubudlelwane badle ixesha elininzi, usenokuba nexesha elithile lokwenza umdla onomdla kunye ntsha. Xa kukho iqela eliqaqambileyo lolwalamano, ngoko kusekho umsebenzi omningi kunye nokusilela komlingane ofumene. Kwaye kuya kufuneka siqale umsebenzi omtsha ngaphandle kokubona ukuzonwabisa. Ngeli xesha, kwaye izigwebo zomntu ziqala ukuba waziphanga ubomi bakho bonke. Kungcono ukubalekela konke oku kunesizungu, apho kuhlala kukho ixesha.
9. Ulwalamano lobulili
Abaninzi bayazi ukuba kuninzi kangakanani isondo kumadoda, kwaye nokuba uninzi umfazi ufuna ukuthandana nokuthanda. Kuphela abo bafazi abasweleyo, balungele umntwana, kunye nabo banenkxalabo yezesondo abanako ukuphela. Ukuba uzikhusela ngokunyanisekileyo konke okuhambelana nobuhlobo bezesondo, amadoda ayaziva kwaye azama ukuhambisana nawe. Ukulahlwa kwesondo kuyisiganeko esihle sokuba yedwa!
8. "Imiyalelo yokusetyenziswa"
Abanye abafazi (njengabanye amadoda) abazi "imiyalelo yokusetyenziswa", banethemba lokuba bayazi yonke into malunga neqabane lawo. Ngenxa yoko, banika loo nto into abazenzele yona, kwaye kungekhona konke abakudingayo, emva koko bayamangalisa: "Kutheni engayixabisi into endiyenzayo?" Kodwa xa beqonda ukuba lukhulu kangakanani lo msebenzi, ukufundisisa ulwimi oluthethwa ngamadoda, banqwenela ukuhlala bodwa.
10. Imfuneko yokulungisa
Njalo ubudlelwane bufana nomdaniso: ukuze udaniso kunye kunye, kufuneka uvumelane malunga nesigqi, ngaphantsi komculo owunjani, kuba ukusuka kwisinyathelo ngasinye, ucinga, isenzo sincike kwindlela umntu wakho akwenza ngayo kwaye ngokuchaseneyo - uya kuxhomekeka kuye. Kwaye le meko yenkxalabo ebudlelwaneni bakho. Kwaye ngenxa yokuba enye ikulungele kakhulu, ngenxa yokuba akudingeki ukuba uvumelanise izenzo zakho nendoda, musa ukubika, kwaye uxoxisane.
11. Izihlobo zakhe
Ukuba uhlakulela ubudlelwane bexesha elide, rhoqo, ekuqaleni okanye emva kwexesha, kuya kufuneka ufumane unxibelelwano kunye nezihlobo zakhe. Kodwa ukwazi ukulawula kunye nosapho lwakho, kwaye nanko kukho umthwalo owongezelelweyo. Hayi, kukulungele ukuhlala ungatshatanga, kunokuba ube neqabane, unina (okanye utata) uhlala efumana iphoso, ngazo zonke iindlela uzama ukungena kumtshato wakho.
Ngoku uqala ukuqaphela ukuba ubudlelwane abukho nje uthando, uthando oluboniswa kwiifilimu, kodwa nomsebenzi onzima? Abaninzi bakholelwa ukuba kulula ukuba munye - musa ukunyanzela ubudlelwane bakho yonke imihla. Yaye unesiqinisekiso sokuthi uncedo lwentlanzi - le nto yinto ebaluleke kakhulu yokuphila?