Ukuze uphephe iingxaki ezinjalo, kuyimfuneko ukuqonda ingqondo yengxaki yakho kunye nokuqonda ukuba yintoni oyenzayo ukuba umntu omncinci uphephe.
Umntu ofihliweyo ngokuqhelekileyo ungumtya wegazi okanye i-phlegmatic. Uhlobo olunjalo lwabantu alufuni ukunikela abanye kwiingxaki zabo kwaye zivule kubo. Uya kwenza njalo nangakumbi nangomntu othandekayo. Ngoko ke, ukuba umfana wakho onalo hlobo, akufanele uthabathe le ndlela yokuziphatha njengento yokuhlambalaza. Abantu abafihlakeleyo ngokufihlakeleyo abaveli ekuzalweni. Oku kufundiswa kubo ngamava eentlalo ezahlukeneyo. Abaninzi babefanele bahambe ekungcatshweni kwimihla yabo, ngoko ngoku bakholelwa ukuba kukho izinto abanye abangenayo ukuba bazi. Ngoko ke, ukuba umfana akakutshilo, umzekelo, malunga nexesha lakhe elidlulileyo, ungacingi ukuba ungumbulali obulalayo. Kwakhona, akukho mfuneko yokumgxeka ngenxa yokuba engakuthandi kwaye engathembeli kuwe. Akukhona malunga nokwethemba. Cinga ngokwakho, kutheni ufuna le nkcazelo? Uninzi kunokwenzeka, uzama nje ukuzolisa umnqweno wakho. Kule nto akukho nto ikukhathazayo. Uninzi lwabasetyhini bafuna ukwazi yonke into nangomntu wonke, nangakumbi malunga nabantu basekuhlaleni. Kodwa umntu akakwazi ukuhlala ekhokelwa kuphela yiminqweno yomntu. Hlonipha ukhetho lomfana wakho. Ukuba akafuni ukuthetha nantoni na, ngoko unesizathu esihle salo. Mhlawumbi loo ntloni ihlazekile okanye ingathandeki ukukhumbula ixesha lokuphila kwakhe. Ngamnye wethu unezinto ezikuphela kwethu. Asifuni ukuthetha ngabo ngabantu, kwaye kukho izizathu ezininzi zezi zinto.
Yingakho ukuba umfana engafuni ukukuxelela into ethile, ungamcindezeli, umncengele okanye ummisele. Ixesha liza kufika, kwaye uya kubelana ngeemfihlelo zakhe. Ukuba oku akukwenzekayo, ngoko akudingeki ukuba wazi nantoni na.
Khumbula ukuba into ephambili ebuhlotsheni ayilona ulwazi olufunyenweyo, kodwa iimvakalelo zakho ezivela kumntu. Ukuba uvakalelwa kwaye ubona ukuba unomusa, uthembeke, uthembeke, akayi kuphinda akwenze kakubi kwaye akayi kukungcatsha, ngoko akudingeki ugxininise kwixesha lakhe elidlulileyo, ngoku alikho nxaxheba.
Into eyahlukileyo yimeko xa ubona ukuba umntu uyabuhlungu kwaye akhathazeke ngento ethile, kodwa akafuni ukuthetha. Kule meko, zama ukumkholisa ukuba amqinise aze anike uncedo lwakhe. Ukuba ngokwenene ungamnceda into ethile, insizwa yakho iza kubelana ngeengxaki. Into ephambili ayiyi kumnyanzela ukuba athethe. Uya kuthatha isigqibo sokuba uza kuxubusha ntoni kuye. Kodwa, ukuba uthe cwaka, ngoko, kunokwenzeka ukuba uncedo lwenu aluyi kuvela ngokufanelekileyo. Ngokuqinisekileyo, ucinga ukuba loo nto ayilunganga, kodwa awukwazi ukuvavanya imeko leyo, ngoko ungafumani izigqibo ezingaxhaswanga yiziphi na iingxabano.
Kakade, ukufihla kungabonakali kuphela kule nto. Kwenzeka ukuba umntu akabonakalisi iimvakalelo zakhe kwiingxelo zakho, izimvo, malunga nolwalamano lwakho. Ujonge nje kwaye uthe cwaka, kwaye awuqondi ukuba uyayiva konke. Ngokuqinisekileyo, oku kubi kakhulu kwaye akuqondakali kwamantombazana ahlala ethetha ngokuthe ngqo kwaye akayikuthintela iimvakalelo. Kodwa musa ukulibala ukuba unemimoya eyahluke ngokupheleleyo, ngoko ke ukuziphatha kwakho kungenakuqondakala, ngokubhekiselele kuwe.
Ukuze uxazulule ingxaki, uxoxe naye ngokuthula. Njengokuba umntu akazange aziphathe, musa ukuphakamisa izwi lakhe nhlobo. Abantu abanesimo esinjalo banenzondo yokukhala baze babe nolwazi ngakumbi. Ngako oko, thintela imvakalelo, kungakhathaliseki ukuba kunzima kangakanani kuwe. Cacisa kumfana wakho omfana ukuba kufuneka ufune ukuphendula kumagama akho. Awukwazi ukuqonda oko ucingayo, uyavuma okanye aphikisana. Kuwe, umbono wakhe ubaluleke kakhulu. Ukongezelela, iingxaki kufuneka zixazululwe kunye, yingakho ufuna ukuba akhulume. Uyaqonda ukuba unomlingiswa onjalo, kodwa kufuneka kwakhona angene kwindawo yakho. Ngako oko, uthembisa ukuziphatha ngokuzinzileyo kwaye ungabi nomsindo ngenxa yokuthula kwakhe, kodwa kufuneka enze ukuvuma nokuthetha malunga noko akucingayo. Ngaphandle koko, ukuthula kuya kubangela ukungaqondi kakuhle, okuya kukuchaphazela kakubi ubudlelwane bakho. Ukuba uthetha izinto ezinjalo ngokuzithoba nangengqiqo, ngaphandle kokumsola, insizwa yakho iya kubeka ingqalelo kwizinto ezithethwa kwaye ziqwalaselwe.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, abantu abaneengxaki ezahlukeneyo kunzima ukudibanisa, kodwa baninzi ngokukhawuleza bathandana. Ngako oko, kufuneka nje uqonde ukuba sonke siyahlukana kwaye ukuphazamiseka kuphela kunokusombulula iingxabano. Ukuba uzisa kule ntombazana - ukufihla kwakhe kuya kuphelisa ukuba yingxaki ebalulekileyo kulwalamano lwakho.