Izizathu zeengcambu.
Uqhekeza, kwaye uhlala ucinga ukuba mhlawumbi, yonke into ingaba yinto eyahlukileyo kuwe. Kungenxa yoko, ubeka ithemba lakho kwizinto ezinokubuyiselwa. Yaye ukuba (okanye nonke bobabini) ninemvakalelo, njani ningaphupha malunga nale nto? Kodwa ngaphambi kokuba ucinge malunga nokuba ufanelekile ukubuyela ubuhlobo bokuqala, kufuneka ukhokelwe ngesizathu sokuba kutyhiywe. Kwaye izizathu ezinjalo, njengomthetho, zininzi. Kwaye banokubambisana ngokungenasisulu, ekuhambeni kwexesha kulula ukulibala, ukusinda, kunye nalabo abashiye uphawu olujulile entliziyweni, ixesha elide lihleli kwimemori yakho. Kwimeko yokuqala - ukuba uthe waqhekeka, njengokungathi uthetha, uyisisiphukuphuku, ungaqondi, ungabi nomona ngenxa yesizathu, okanye wenza ngenxa yesincinci esincinane. Ngenxa yezi zizathu, unokukwazi ukulinganisa ngokulula, uphelele ngokupheleleyo kwaye kulula ukuqala yonke into yakho yangaphambili ukusuka ekuqaleni. Kodwa zikhona nezizathu zeso sithuba, esinokuchaphazela kakhulu ulwalamano lwakho nangemva kokuxolelana. Zizo ezo zibhekiselele kwizinto ezinokushiya "intlungu ebunzima entliziyweni" yenye yeqabane kwaye kunzima ukuthetha. Umzekelo, isoka lakho langaphambili, ofuna ukuphinda ubuhlobo bakho, ukukhwabanisa ngonya (mhlawumbi kanye), wakhulisa isandla sakhe ngokumelene nawe, ukuhlazeka ngokuziphatha kunye nokunye. Enye yezi zizathu ezenza ukuba uthathe isinyathelo esinoxanduva kwaye uthi cha ulwalamano. Kule meko, kuyimfuneko, okokuqala, ukucinga ngekamva lakho elikuloo mntu. Emva kwakho konke, akuyinyaniso, xa udibene kunye lakho lokugqibela, uya kuphinda uvale kwakhona zonke ezi ngxaki kuwe. Khumbula ukuba abantu abanqabile ukutshintsha kwaye ukuba kunjalo, kwenzeka ukuba oku kuya kwenzeka kwakhona. Ngelinye igama, ukuba ucinga ngokukhetha ukuba ungayifuni ukubuyela kulo mfana, qwalasela lo msebenzi ngokucophelela kwaye ukhumbule oko kubangele ukuhlukana kwakho.
Siqhathanisa inyaniso.
Ukuba awuzange ukhethe isigqibo, buyela kwintombi yakho yangaphambili okanye uqhubeke ungamnaki, zama ukwenza uluhlu lwazo zonke iimpawu zakhe ezintle kunye nezimbi. Emva kwakho konke, uyazi intetho: "Eli phepha liya kuphelela yonke into", - kutheni ungayiqwalasela? Thatha iphepha, ulidwebe kwiikholamu ezimbini: ngowokuqala bhala zonke ii-pluses (cacisa oko uhamba nazo ngokuqinisekileyo), kwaye okwesibini - iifom ye-anti-boy yakho. Emva koko ubabeke phantsi komqubo, kwaye kusasa, ngentloko entsha, funda konke oku. Kakade, unokutsho oko endaweni yokuba unokuphosa imali. Kodwa akuyi kunika nantoni na, kuba ikusasa lakho, apho ufuna ukukubona emva kwakho indoda ezinikezele nothando. Ngoko funda ezi zidibanisi kunye nezitishi kwaye uzenzele isigqibo esipheleleyo, nokuba ufuna ukubuyela kubuhlobo obusakuba nalo. Ngendlela, khumbula oko wathandana nalo mntu kunye nendlela okwazi ngayo ukufunda nokuyifumana. Khumbula ukuba oku kuthetha ukuba kuninzi kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kunceda ukugqiba ukuba wenze ntoni.
Amagqibo anqume kakhulu.
Liliphi igama lolwalamano lwakho lwangaphambili? Iveki, inyanga, iinyanga ezintandathu? Yintoni endiyithethayo, awuzange ufumane ukufumana kule nkqubela emfutshane "ephakathi kwegolide" apho izithandwa zihlala khona kwaye "ziphefumla". Okanye mhlawumbi awuzange ube naloo khemisti okanye ungenalo ixesha. Kodwa nangona kunjalo, ngokuqinisekileyo, unokubuyela kulobu buhlobo uze uzame ukuwakha kwakhona. Ewe, ukuba ube kunye iminyaka, ezimbini, ezinhlanu ... kwaye zahlukana, kholwa, akunakwenzeka ukuba nayiphi na into iya kutshintsha xa ujoyina. Ukuba awunalo ixesha elaneleyo lokwakha uthando lwakho, akusiqondi ukuba unamathele kunye kwakhona, kuba banokuphinda baphule. Kwaye okwesibini oku kuya kuba buhlungu kakhulu.
Phila ngaphandle kokucinga ngawe ...
Kukho nayiphi na indebe enegqoko, umgca uhlala ubonakala, nokuba usebenzisa i-glue ebonakalayo ukuyifihla. Yiyo kanye eyenzekayo ubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu. Hamba kabini emlanjeni owodwa, loo nto, ngokuqinisekileyo, ihloniphekile kwaye, njengoko bethethayo, sele ibonakaliswe, kodwa isabelo somngcipheko sihlala sisoloko. Oku kulungile ukukhumbula. Cinga ngako, mhlawumbi akufanele ubuyele kumfana wakho wokuqala? Emva kwakho konke, uhlala ucinga ukuba unokufumana yonke into esuka kwimizamo yesibini, umane uphephe ngaphandle kwakho ithuba lokuhlangabezana nomntu ongokoqobo, apho yonke into ingakwazi ukuphuma kumzamo wokuqala. Cinga, mhlawumbi awudingi ukubuyela kwixesha elizayo, kodwa kulungele ukuqala ubomi obutsha (uxolo nge-tautology) ukusuka kwiphepha elitsha kunye nothando olutsha!
Yaye isiluleko sokulungisa: musa ukubuyela apho usu tshisile khona, kuba kunokunokwenzeka kuwe kwakhona, kwaye ukutshisa kuya kuba buhlungu kakhulu, kwaye inqabile kuyo. Ufanelwe okulungileyo! Ufanele ukuthanda nokuthandwa ngaphandle kokuvavanya, ukuphindaphinda nokuzama "inamba ezimbini", ezingenakwenzeka, ezingenakwenzeka, zinokunquma. Phila ngekamva, kungekhona edlulileyo kwaye uphonsa ngaphandle kweengxaki zakho ezingenasidingo ezikukhumbuza kwintombi yakho yangaphambili kunye nolwalamano lwangaphambili naye! Inhlanhla!