Ngaphandle koko, uya kukwazi njani ukuseka ubudlelwane kunye nokuqinisekisa ukutshutshiswa komntu oyintanda kwenye kwenye esikhathini esizayo?
Kutheni amadoda ekopela? Emva kwesinye isenzo esinjalo kukho izizathu ezikhethekileyo, kungekho njalo, nangona kunjalo, kuyaqondakala kubafazi. Nazi izizathu ezintlanu ezenzeka ngokuphindaphindiweyo kunabanye. Wambona kwenye! Ewe, kutheni wenza njalo kuwe? .. Ngamanye amaxesha unokuba yimbangela yokungcatsha indoda ethandekayo evela kwenye. Xa uthe wagwetywa, kuyafaneleka ukuzama ukumxolela.
Xa ndiba ligorha ...
Indlela yokuphakamisa ukuzithemba? Ukubonakalisa inkampani yamadoda amatsha "ubugcisa"? Kwabaninzi abafana, indlela engcono yokuyicombulula le ngxaki iyinkohlakalo. Amantombazana amaninzi afakwa ebhedeni, abanokuzithemba ngakumbi.
Olu hlobo lokutshintsha, lunokubangelwa yimikhwa emibi - kuba bonke banceda ukujamelana nobunzima beengqondo: ukutshaya kugxininisa iimbilini, utywala utywala ubuqhetseba bokubona.
Ukutshintsha indoda ethandekayo kwelinye okanye ngesondo kwicala kunceda umntu ukuba anqobe iingxaki zakhe. Ngokomzekelo, umfana unokuqhawulwa ngquzulwano: ngakwesinye icala, ufuna ulwalamano olusondeleyo kunye nawe, ngolunye ulo-uyesaba ukulahlekelwa inkululeko yakhe. Ngoko ukhawuleza.
Ukutshintsha indoda ethandekayo kwenye into kukunyanga ngokuqonda, kwaye ngokukhawuleza uhlalisa amayeza, evumela ukuba abanye bafazi bafazi bafumane impembelelo. Ngenxa yokuziphatha okunjalo, umntu unokufihla ukungabi nako kwezinto ezizinzileyo, ukungavali.
Ukuba ufuna ukugcina ubudlelwane, kuthatha ixesha elide ukusebenzisana: kufuneka siyiqonde iingxaki zayo, sithengise indoda ethandekayo kwenye kwaye ufumane izicombululo. Uya kufuneka ube nomonde uze ubonise konke ukuqonda kwakho ukuqonda oko kukutya ngoku.
Ulwazi malunga nokuqwalaselwa
Ukutshintsha indoda ethandekayo kwenye okanye into enxulumene nomnatha emva kwakho yindlela yokufashisa. Ngaba uke wakha ukukhala okukrakra ukhala entliziyweni yomhlobo wakho wesilisa? Andizange ndive. Kuba abantu abavami ukukhala. Benza okusemandleni abo ukukhangela umdla. Kwaye no kutshintsha. Ingqiqo ilula: umhlobo wakho ukholelwa ukuba xa ubona enye intombazana, uyazisola ngokuba akazange amkhathalele kwaye akayikuthandana. Kwaye, mhlawumbi, nokuba uya kuphumelela ukuyiphumelela kwi-passion entsha.
Ngamanye amaxesha ukutshatyalaliswa komntu othandekayo komnye kungumqondiso weSOS. Lo mfana, ngaloo ndlela, ubonisa ngokucacileyo ukuba lixesha lokutshintsha into ebudlelwaneni. Ngokomzekelo, bahlaziye kwakhona, babuyisele ukuthanda kwabo ngaphambili, bahlukane ngesondo.
Ubuza: "Kutheni, nje abantu babengenakwenzeka ukusho?" Ewe, abaninzi abantu bathanda ukuthetha intliziyo ngentliziyo ngezenzo ezinjalo zokubonisa. Nangona kunjalo, le ndoda ngokwakhe ayisoloko ikwazi ukuqonda oko akuyiyo ngokukhululekile kunye nolwalamano lwakho ... Tshela umngane wakho indlela engathandeki ngayo kukuba wakhetha le ndlela yokuchaphazela. Uze uzame ukufumanisa oko wayekhangela kwiingalo zenye intombazana? Uvakalelo olutsha? Zeziphi na? Ngomnye uya kuba nako ukuzalisa ubomi bakho ngokubonakala okucacileyo.
"Ukuziphindezela"
Amadoda athile axhomekeka kwaye aziqhenyce. Ukongezelela, yinto yesiko kuluntu lwabantu ukuba bahlasele ummangalelwa.
Yintoni intombazana enokuyenza ukuze kubangelwe umoya wokuphindezela? Uyakumkhohlisa kuqala okanye amnike isizathu sokuba acinge ukunyeliswa. Emva koko le ndoda izama ukuphinda iqale. Umgaqo we "iliso ngeliso, iimpondo zeempondo" uzimisele ukuziphatha kwawo.
Kukho ukhetho. Ukuba uthe wanikela isithandwa sakho isizathu, uthetha naye ngokungathetheki, uchaze isizathu sokwenza kwakho. Inokwenzeka ukuba, uya kuba nakho ukuseka ubudlelwane. Emva koko, ukungcatshiswa kwakhe akulona umzamo wokufumana ulwahlulo olutsha, kodwa kuphela inyathelo elibi lomntu othukiweyo.
Ukuba unetyala lakho, kwaye yena ngokwakhe unento ethile kuye, kufuneka ucacise imeko. Unomona onobukhwele, opheka nawe, kwaye akayi kukushiya yedwa kunye nokusola kwakhe.
Ingozi nje!
Ndahamba ngorhwebo kwaye ndalala nomnye umntu ohamba naye kwigumbi. Ndaqalisa iholide ngeholide. Ngentsasa olulandelayo emva kweqela elibambiseneyo livuke ngasecaleni komnye umntu osebenza naye osemncinci ... Konke oku "kungenangqungquthela", ukuxhaswa kwexesha elifutshane kwaye kungekho mfanelo. Ngaphandle kwembopheleleko kumntu ashintshileyo, kodwa kungekhona kulowo atshintshileyo. Kwinto eyenzekayo ngokungenangqungquthela, akukho mpazamo yomntu. Okanye ekungcatshweni komntu othandekayo kwenye into ufanele uxanduva?
Ngamanye amaxesha umntu uyalahla yonke into ngenxa ye "confidential" yakhe, abahlobo, iifika. Ngenxa yoko, akalungele ukuphendula ngenxa yezigqibo zakhe. Inokwenzeka ukuba, ayiyi kukwazi ukuthatha uxanduva kwixesha elizayo. Ukongezelela, oku kuziphatha komntu kuthetha ukuba akacingi ngezenzo zakhe kunye nemiphumo yabo. Ukuba umfana uvuma iphutha aze aguquke, uhlala nje ukumxolela. Makhe ndiqonde ukuba ucaphuke kangakanani ngokuziphatha kwakhe, kodwa ngaphandle kokungafuneki. Fumana isibindi sokwamkela isenzo sakhe njenge-accomplished accompli engenzi lutho ngobuntu bakho, kuba ufunga ukuba nguwe kuphela othandayo.
Culmination, denouement ...
Akusoloko kulula ukuxelela intombazana ngokukhawuleza ukuba ufuna ukwahlukana. Ngenxa yenceba okanye ngomkhwa umntu uqhubeka edibana naye, ehlala nengcamango kwelinye, ngaloo ndlela afune ukukhohlisa.
Myeke aye. Kuyinto enqwenelekayo ngoxolo nakuzo zonke iinkalo ezine. Kakade, oku kunzima, ngakumbi ukuba uqhubeka umthanda. Ulungele ukuba umxolele kanye, emva koko, amaninzi amaxesha amaninzi ... Uya kuphinda aphinde azame ukukhupha ikhefu. Ubunzima bunzima ngokuqonda ukuba akayikushiya kuphela, kodwa ushiya omnye.
Qiniseka ukuba akuyena ukuba unemilenze emide okanye ubuninzi bezinto eziguquguqukayo. Utshintshile ngokwakhe waza wadibana nendoda efuna ukuba nayo kule nqanaba yobomi bakhe.
Musa ukuhamba kwakhe kwiakhawunti yakho. Kuwe, eli sihlandlo sokutshintsha ngokwalo - ukuhlaziya kwakhona ubudlelwane bakho namadoda, ukhetho lwakho kwaye ube ngumntu oqolileyo. Emva koko, ukukwazi ukuyeka umntu othandayo kukubonakalisa ukukhula ngokwenene.