Ngoko, uyintombazana yanamhlanje, uthembele kuwe, kodwa ngegama elithi " ukuba umntu akalwi uluthando, ke akayithandi," ingqondo yakho iyazithoba kwaye iyaqonda ukuba inyaniso yile binzana. Yintoni ke? Yaye wena unokukwazi ukuchaza oko kuthetha ukuthini "ukulwa noluthando"? Mhlawumbi uxubana phakathi kwamaqabane amabini, kwaye awukwazi ukuqonda ukuba kutheni bangabibizi kwi-duel, abakuniki iintlanganiso ezintathu, ukuze wenze isigqibo kwaye unike impendulo yokugqibela, ungazi kakuhle abazali bakho ukuze ufumane indawo yabo? Okwangoku umzekelo ongathandabuzekiyo: uxabana nomthandayo, kwaye wabuyela endleleni, ugqibe ekubeni kulungele ukuyeka phezu kwakho kunokuzenzela into kwaye uzenzele iingxaki ezingaphezulu. Kwaye, emva kokuthetha, umzekelo, kunye nomama wakho, weza kwisigqibo sokuba ukuba umntu akawulwi uthando, ngoko akayithandi , i-psychology yobudlelwane yinto ebalulekileyo, kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo kukukhokelela ngokuthe ngandlela-thile kwiingcamango zobuxoki. Ukwakha uvuyo lwakho luya kuba ngowokuqala, kodwa kunye nomnye umlingane, ubiza amagama angaphambili angagqibekanga kwaye akhalaze ngawo wonke umntu onako. Kodwa ngaba wenza into efanelekileyo? Emva kokulandela le logic kunye nesicwangciso senkqubo, unokuhlala kunye neempumlo zakho, kuba abantu bayaphelile, i-alas, isixhobo. Ngoko cinga ngezenzo zakho. Khumbula abafazi abasemgangathweni kunye nolwalamano lwabo namadoda. Ngokomzekelo, ilizwi lomnye wamabhinqa amathandayo, uGrace Kelly: "Indoda ngokwemvelo ivila. Ukuba bonke abesifazana babenomsebenzi, amadoda ahlala ekhaya ephuza ubhiya kwaye ekhangela kwiTV, "okanye ibinzana elilahliwe ngumdlali we-actress, umgcini wesikrini kunye nomlobi kumntu oyedwa, uBette Davis:" Abasetyhini abaqinileyo bayashada kuphela amadoda abuthathaka. " Kwaye ngaba ngabafazi bekhulu lama-20! Ngoko ukuba ucinga ukuba kufuneka kubekho into eyenziwa yindoda yedwa, ngoko uphosakeleyo. Ubudlelwane bwakhiwa ngabantu ababini, kwaye akunakwenzeka ukuba umntu akwinkqubo ibe yinkqubo, njengokuba ehleli emhlabathini eneengalo eziboshwe. Ukuba ufuna ngokwenene umntu, ukuba uyamthanda ngokwenene, ngoko uya kwenza konke ukwenza umhlobo wakho asondele. Ewe, ukuba ulungele ukuhlala iiyure kunye nepakethe ye-chips kwi-TV kwaye ulinde u-HE ukuba umnxeba, kodwa ungabizi kuqala ngokuba "uzikhukhumezile," ngoko ndinqwenela umonde kunye nesitokisi phezulu kweepips iminyaka emininzi ... phambili.
Uyazi, xa ndibhalela amanqaku anjalo, ndicinga ngentsingiselo yokuba thina, besifazane benkulungwane ye-21, sikhalaza malunga nento esililwela ngayo ngo-19-esilwa nayo, kwaye sabalekela kuyo. Sifuna ukuzimela phantsi kwamadoda - sineengxaki yokuba sinikwe ingqwalasela encinane, sifuna ukuphepha ukuxhatshazwa ngokwesondo - ngoku sithwala iilwimi ezintle, ngokokuba amadoda kuphela asifunayo, afuna umsebenzi - ngoku ngoku sibuhlungu ukuba "silima njengamahashe" njalo njalo ngakumbi. Iingqungquthela ezimbini kwiimbali - pshik, kwaye ezininzi zitshintshile. Umbono wehlabathi womntu uye waba nguyehlukile. Makhe sicinge ngento umntu aziva ngayo, ngubani na, njengokuba ucinga, akalweli uthando?
Amadoda bonke ubomi kufuneka umntu athile. Ngenxa yokuba bangamadoda. Ukutyala umthi-kufuneka, uvelise unyana-kufuneka, wakhe indlu-kufuneka, unikezele intsapho-kufuneka, uncede unina-kufuneka, ulwele uthando-kufuneka, njalo njalo njalo nangaphezulu. Oku kungenxa yethu, amantombazana, eninzi exolelwe kwaye avunyelwe. Sinokubetha indoda, kwaye asiyi kuba nantoni na. Kodwa ukuba indoda ibetha ibhinqa, oku akongezeli kwinto yakhe.
Kodwa silwa ngokulingana kwamadoda nabasetyhini, oku kuthetha ukuba kwaba lula ukuba amadoda abe buthathaka kancane, afuneke aphendule, athatyathwe ngakumbi. Eli bhinqa aliyi kuba lihleko ukuba umntu wokuqala uya kuqesha umhla, owokuqala uya kuxolelana, owokuqala uya kunikezela ukutshata, owokuqala uya kumanga. Ewe, ukuzingca kwethu akunanto, xa sibona indlela umntu asijonga ngayo, indlela abonisa ngayo iimvakalelo zakhe. Kodwa ukuphikisa ukuba "akayi kulwela uthando" ngenxa yokuba kwezinye iimeko azizange zenze njengoko sifuna, akufanelekile. Sivame ukunyanisela yonke into. Cinga, ngokuba into endiyenzela yona, nayo, uhlobo lomzabalazo kuye. Ukuba awuyithandi loo nto wayengazibonakalisi, akazange enze into ethile, ngoko uxoxe naye naye. Ngokuqinisekileyo umntu wakho unesizathu esinamandla. Ngomqondiso ofanayo, bonke abantu bahluke, kwaye ukuba imeko apho insizwa yakho ingenzi lutho ayiphindaphindiwe ngokokuqala ngqa, mhlawumbi umcimbi ungumntu wakhe, kungekhona kuye, kwaye uzenzele isigqibo sokuba unelisekile kweli lizwe lemiba, okanye cha. Amadoda athande intuthuzelo, kwaye ukuba uyayithanda intanda yakho, ngamanye amaxesha uya kuyo ukuze uvume. Inhlanhla!