Ukubonakaliswa kwemvakalelo yinqanaba eliphezulu lobudlelwane. Lowo owawuwela kwaye wakhulela, wafikelela kumgangatho ophezulu wokuqonda. Yonke into ilungileyo ngokumodareyitha, ingakumbi xa iimvakalelo zidibeneyo, ngoko kulungile kwaye kubalulekile ukubonisa xa ubuhlobo buyakhelwa ekuthembeleni, ukunyaniseka nokuqonda, kuya kuba mnandi kumntu kunye nomfazi ukuba abe kunye. Ngokuqhelekileyo, abasetyhini banqabileyo xa besondele. Babonisa ubuthathaka babo kuqala. Bathetha ngezinto abazivelayo ngendoda, baphupha malunga nezicwangciso zekamva, bakha i-air locks in cloud clouds. Kwaye amadoda amaninzi ayinyameko kwimicimbi yabo yeemvakalelo. Bayaqaphela nokukhethwa kwamagama kunye nezenzo zabo. Ngokuqhelekileyo abazi nokuba nini na ukuvuma njani ukuba bathande, abazi ukuba ingavuleleka kumfazi. Bahlala bezibuza ukuba umntu ufanele avule umfazi wakhe iimvakalelo?
Njengabesifazana, amadoda ahlukeneyo, anabalingani abahlukeneyo, becinga, abenzayo. Umntu ngamnye uhlola ngokuthe ngileyo imeko ethile, nganye ibonakalisa ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo. Amadoda anokuhlukaniswa ngasese kwiintlobo ezininzi, iintlobo, iiklasi, ungabiza nantoni na, kodwa isitshixo sokubahlula kumaqela anjalo asitshintshi. Ngako oko, bafana: intshwankqonkqonkqo - nayiphi na iphupha, iCasanova kunye nomthandi ofanelekileyo, ukuzithemba, intloko, indoda efanelekileyo. Ngamnye wabo uziphatha ngendlela eyahlukileyo. Ngamnye wabo uvakalelwa kwaye uyayixabisa lo mbuzo olula, ngaba umntu kufuneka avule umfazi wakhe iimvakalelo?
Makhe siqale, mhlawumbi, kunye nendoda enethemba. Olu luhlobo lomntu ohlala ekwazi oko akufunayo nendlela angayifumana ngayo, akayikhathaleli ngemingcipheko ephambi kwayo. Amadoda anjalo akhethe ngokukhethekileyo abakhethiweyo bawo, kuba bayazi iimpawu abafanele babe nazo. Ukuba ngokukhawuleza ibhinqa liyamthanda, ngoko ngokuqinisekileyo uyazi malunga naloo nto, amadoda anjalo awanakukwenza ulinde ukunyakaza okusebenzayo kuye. Olu hlobo lwamadoda alinakukucela icebiso, uya kwenza. Ukuba uvakalelwa into, uya kukuxelela ngemvakalelo yakhe, uya kubavula. Yaye le mpu melelo, kuba umntu onjalo, akayikwesaba ukuba ujikeleze, uyazi ukuba uyazithemba yena kunye nekamva lakhe, kuye akufanele alindele ukuba izinto ezingamangalisa.
Inkwenkwana, okanye inokuthiwa yiphupha nayiphi na enye indlela. La madoda anomoya onobubele, onyanisekileyo, onobubele, onomdla, kunomdla ukuhlala nabo ukuvuma kunye nokucinga ngekamva. Olu hlobo lomntu luyakwazi ukudala ubudlelwane phakathi kobudlelwane bakho, kuba uthando luyingxenye yentsapho yakhe. Amadoda anjalo ayenzileyo, nangamaxesha athile. Ngokuqinisekileyo, banjengama-kittens amancinci, abacela ukuba bathathwe kwaye bakhuphe, kodwa, kunjalo, baxhamla. Olu hlobo aluceli ukuba umntu avule iimvakalelo zakhe kumfazi. Uyakusamangalisa ukuba kwisibini sokuqala, ngeentlanganiso zokuqala, uyavuma kuwe ngothando lwakhe olukhulu. Ndikulungele ukuphikisana, kuya kukumangazela, kuba ngokuqhelekileyo owokuqala ukuqaphela amantombazana othandweni, ngenxa yobungozi babo nothando. Kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kuphazamisa ngokukhawuleza, kuba unomnye othobekileyo, umphefumlo osengozini, oko kukuthi, umfazi, ngokwaneleyo kwintsapho.
Ngokubhekiselele kulolu hlobo lwamadoda anjengoCasanova kunye nomthandi onolwazi, oku kunalo igama elikhulu, igama elibalulekileyo, igama, ukutyunjwa kwisihlwele samadoda, bathanda ukuzithoba. Ewe bafana neikopi ezivela kwi-Red Book, azinqabile kakhulu kwixesha lethu. Kwaye emva koko, zama ukufumana umntu owaziyo kakuhle abafazi, njani kwaye kufuneka afike nini, ukuze aneliseke. La madoda ayenzi kakuhle ngcamango yokuba abacingi nje indlela yokuzikholisa, kodwa kunye neqabane labo. Ewe, ngokubhekiselele kwisondo, mhlawumbi abanakho ukukhuphisana, abanokuxhamla, abanomdla, bayazi kakhulu ngale nto. Ngaba umntu kufuneka avule iimvakalelo zakhe kumfazi? Akayi kubuza umbuzo onjalo kuye nakumcebisi bakhe. Olu hlobo lwamadoda alufuni ukuba nomntu ngonaphakade, ukucinga ngentsapho enkulu, yolonwabo. Unelisekile ngenguqu eqhubekayo yabalingani. Kwaye ekuthandweni komnye wabo, ngokuqinisekileyo akayi kuvuma, ngaphandle kokuba angayilahla ibinzana elinjalo ukuze adibanise ixhoba elilandelayo ekulala. Kodwa akayi kuveza iimvakalelo zakhe kumfazi, oko kukuthi, ngaphezu kwesidima sakhe. Mhlawumbi la madoda ayika nje ukungathinteka kobudlelwane, ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa inkululeko yabo, ukwesaba utshintsho, abazange bakhule kodwa baziphatha njengabantwana abancinane abafuna ukufumana amathoyizi amasha.
Enye into enobumnene. Ziyakwazi zonke izinto, kungakhathaliseki ukuba zishishini, zibuhlobo kuphela, okanye zibudlelane nomfazi. Uhlala eyazi ixesha lokuthetha into, ngamanye amaxesha uya kunika, kungekhona ukudala iimeko ezihlazo. Kwimibuzo enoba umntu kufuneka aveze iimvakalelo zakhe kumfazi, ukuba uyindoda engakwazi ukuyiphendula ngokulula. Amadoda anjalo aya kuvula kuwe, ukuba ayayiva, okanye aqonde ukuba into efuna ukuyivulela. Kakade, banokuthi bathethe ngeemvakalelo zabo, bavule phambi kwowesifazane, ukuba babonise ukuba bangabani na amadoda afanayo, okumele bawenze okokuqala. Ngaba uyayixabisa isenzo esinamandla?
Uhlobo lokugqibela lwamadoda ngumntu ogqibeleleyo. Le yinye apho sikholelwa kwaye silinde ukususela ebuntwaneni. Lo ngumbusi onamandla oza kukhwela ngehashe elimhlophe aze alondoloze um princess omhle ekugqibeleni. Azikho iinkosana ezinjalo, thina ngokwethu sichaza le nqanaba kumntu wonke. Ngoko ke, asiyazi ukuba umntu kufuneka aveze iimvakalelo zakhe kumfazi, ukuba kunjalo nangaloo nto ayikho.
Akunandaba nokuba uluphi uhlobo lomntu okhethiweyo wakho. Akunandaba, uya kukuxelela ngemvakalelo yakho ngeveki okanye ngenyanga, kubalulekile ukuba ivule phambi kwakho kwaye iya kuba njengesipho esamkelekileyo esifanelekileyo sezulu. Into ephambili yindoda ayiyikucinezela kwaye icacise ukuba yiyiphi into anokukubonisa yona.