Ukuba awukwazi ukujamelana nomntwana wakho, ukuba ukungahloneli kunye nokuxabana kube yinxalenye yobomi bakho, ukuba ukuthetha kunye "nomntwana" kukukudumala ngokupheleleyo, ungadikibali. Inqaku lethu "Ukuba umntwana akayithobeli into enokuyenza?" Ngaba uya kukunceda ukuba uyisombulule le ngxaki.
Icala liyakulungiswa, kodwa kukho umsebenzi othe wenziwa. Abantwana abathandekayo badla ngokumangalelwa ngokuzama ukufumana kubo imfuza emibi, ububi, njl. Enyanisweni, kwiqela "labantu abanzima" babhalela abantwana abanobuthathaka, abasengozini.
Ukuphendula ngokunyamekela ngakumbi kunabantwana abazinzileyo, ngaphantsi kwefuthe lemithwalo, "bayagqithisa i-reels" phantsi kweempembelelo zobomi obuye bavela. Izizathu zisebunzulu bomntwana wengqondo. Izizathu zezi zinto ziyimvakalelo, kwaye kufuneka ziziwe.
Eyokuqala ngumzabalazo wokuqwalasela. Ukungafumani umlinganiselo ofanelekileyo wokunakwa, ngoko kuyimfuneko ukuba uphumelele ngophuhliso lomntwana, ngenxa yokuphila kwakhe, indlela yokufumana ingqalelo ngokuqinisekileyo ukungathobeli. Ingqalelo engcono kunokuba ayikho.
Isizathu sesibini kukubhikisha kumandla angaphezulu, ukugcinwa kwabazali - umzabalazo wokuzimela. Imfuno ethi "mna" womntwana oneminyaka emibini ubudala uqhubeka nokuqhubeka ngexesha lonke lobuncinci, ukhula ngokukhawuleza ebusheni.
Abantwana banomdla kakhulu kumngcipheko, ukuphulwa kweli nqwenelo. Ukuba ukugxekwa kunye neendleko ziyancipha, kwaye iingcebiso kunye namazwi athetha ngokuqhelekileyo - abantwana abavukeli. Ukunyaniseka, ukuzincama, izenzo ngokuchasene. Injongo yaloo nto kukukhusela ilungelo lokuthatha isigqibo kwimicimbi yabo.
Isizathu sesithathu ngumnqweno wokuziphindezela. Abantwana bavame ukukhubekiswa ngabazali babo. Izizathu? Bahlukile. Ukususela kwizithembiso ezingagqibekanga zokuqhawula umtshato kwabazali. Kule meko, intsingiselo yokuziphatha kakubi - "Undibuhlungu, nangona uziva uzibi."
Kwaye, ekugqibeleni, isizathu sesine kukuba ukungabi nalukholo kuwe, kwimpumelelo yakho. Umntwana akasebenzi kuyo nayiphi na indawo ebomini, kwaye ukudumazeka kwenzeka ngokupheleleyo. Emva kokufumana ukungaphumeleli kunye nokuhlambalaza kwidilesi yakhe, ufika kwisiphetho esithi: "Kutheni kukho into, ayiyi kusebenza." Kusemphefumlweni, kwaye ngokuziphatha kuya kubonisa: "Andikhathalele", "Ewe, kubi", "Ngoko ke, ndiza kuba kubi." Iinjongo zomntwana zinokwemvelo kwaye zintle. Bathetha ngomnqweno wokuphumelela, baveze imfuno yendalo yokuhlonipha nokuhlonipha ubuntu bomntwana, isidingo sokunakwa, ukukhathazeka nokunyamekela kubazali. Inkathazo "yobunzima" kubantwana kukuba le mfuno ayifumanekanga, kwaye ixhamla kule nto kunye nokuzama ukulungiselela le nqongophala ngeendlela ezingenako ukwenza nayiphi na into. Yiyiphi "ukungaqondani" kwala madoda? Ewe, nje ukuba abazi ukuba bangayenza njani ngokuhlukileyo. Ngako oko, ukuphulwa kwento embi yokuziphatha komntwana kuyisignali, isicelo sokuncediswa.
Umbuzo obalulekileyo uvela: Yintoni enokuyenza emva koko, xa ndicinga ukuba, zeziphi iimeko zihambelana necala lakho? Okokuqala, zama ukungazange usebenze njengoko umntwana esetyenziselwa kwaye ulindela kuwe, ngaloo ndlela uyaphule le ngqungquthela eliyingozi, kwaye emva kokuya kwimeko yesibonelelo. Uncedo kwimeko nganye, ngokuqinisekileyo, eyahlukileyo.
Ukuba umcimbi umzabalazo wokuqwalasela-bonisa ingqalelo yakho enhle kumntwana. Oku kukhuthazwa ngokuhamba, imisebenzi edibeneyo, imidlalo. Ngeli xesha, ungayinaki ukuthobela kwakhe. Kuza kudlula ixesha elifutshane, kwaye imfuno yabo iya kutshabalala ngokwayo.
Ukuba imbambano yeengxabano ngumzabalazo wokuqinisekisa, ngoko ke, ngokuchaseneyo, ulungelelanise ulawulo lwakho lokusingatha kwimicimbi yomntwana. Kubaluleke kakhulu kubantwana ukuba baqokelele amava abo. Oku kusebenza kuzo zombini izigqibo zomntwana kunye nokungaphumeleli kwakhe. Yeka loo mfuno, leyo, njengoko uyazi ngamava, akayi kuzalisekisa. Ngokuphambene noko, musa ukuluselela isigqibo sakhe, kwaye uvumelane naye ngokwemigaqo yokuphunyezwa kwayo kwaye uxoxe ngeenkcukacha. Kodwa ngokukodwa uya kuqonda ukuba ukuthanda nokunyanzela komntwana kukuphela kwendlela yokutarhuzisa: "Makhe ke ndihlale ngqondweni wam."
Uye wafumana ukuhlambalaza - zibuze umbuzo: Yintoni eyabangela umntwana ukuba akwenze kuwe? Nguwuphi na amava aziva ngayo? Ungamcaphukisa njani? Emva kokuqonda isizathu, kuyimfuneko ukuyiqeda.
Nangona kunjalo, imeko enzima kakhulu kumzali ophelelwe yithemba, kunye nomntwana olahlekelwe ukholo ngamandla akhe. Ukuziphatha okunengqiqo komzali kule meko - yeka ukucela ukuziphatha okufanelekileyo. Zero izilindele zakho kunye namabango. Khangela izinga lemisebenzi elitholakalayo kumntwana, kwaye uhambe ukusuka kweli nqanaba lokuqala elwandle kunye nomntwana wakho. Ushiya umngcipheko naye. Ngelo xesha, ungavumeli naluphi na ukugxekwa kuye. Khuthaza, phawula impumelelo encinane yomntwana! Mkhusele ngokuthetha nabantu abadala abakujikelezile esikolweni. Impumelelo yokuqala iya kumkhuthaza.
Kwaye ekugqibeleni. Ungalindelanga ukuba ngokunyamekela kwakho uza kuphumelela ukususela ngomhla wokuqala. Ufuna umonde kunye nexesha. Inzame ebalulekileyo kufuneka ijoliswe ekutshintsheni iiflegi zeemvakalelo eziphazamisayo (ukucaphuka, umsindo, ukuphelelwa ithemba) kwikhosi eyakhayo yokwenza. Ngomqondo othile, kufuneka uguqule ngokwakho. Kungenzeka ukuba umntwana akakholelwa ngokukhawuleza kuwe kunye nokunyaniseka kwezicwangciso zakho, kwaye ukujonga ngento yakhe kuya kuqinisa ukungathobeli, kodwa kufuneka - unyanzelekile - ukunyamezela kwaye oku luvavanyo olunzima. Kholelwa kuwe, kunye nenhlanhla!