Xa indoda ishiya, ihlala ibuhlungu. Nangona ubomi bentsapho abuzange buvuyiswe. Kwaye nokuba indoda yayingayithandi. Lo bunjani bomntu. Xa umntu ekunike ubuncinane kanye ukuba aqonde oko kukuphazamisayo phakathi kwabanye, ngubani ongenakuphila ngaphandle kwakho, ukuba ubona ukuba uyona nto ibhetele, ngokukhawuleza kwakhona "uqhubelela" kwi "chungechunge jikelele" - oku akunakunxungupha, kungekhona ...
Kutheni ku buhlungu?
Ukunyamekelwa komyeni kungekhona nje ukuphazamisa ukuzithemba, kuphazamise ukuzithemba, kodwa kushiya ezinye izikhewu ezinobomi ebomini. Isicwangciso sokwenza isantya sihlala sihlukana. Kufunyaniswa ukuba isangqa soqhelana nabo ngokuqhelekileyo sinamalungu omyeni kunye noqhagamshelwano nabo luphukile. Akukho mntu omele ufundise, akukho namnye omele ukutshutshisa ubomi bakho, akukho mntu uya kuphazamisa, akukho namnye omele aphikisana nawo, ukuba ngubani na onokuthi athathe inkunkuma kunye nokuhlamba izitya.
Ukubonakalisa isambatho esitsha okanye ukuqhayisa ngamagqabha amancinci amancinci, ngokuqinisekileyo, unokusebenza kunye. Kodwa ukuba udlale "kwixhoba elingenacala", "kumntu ogcina yonke into" okanye, ngokuthe ngqo, "intombazana engenakunceda unonophelo", kunye neminye imidlalo efana nayo emsebenzini ayisoloko inokwenzeka. Kwiintsapho, nangona kunjalo, ngokuqhelekileyo le midlalo iba yinto enokwenza isiqhelo, kwaye xa imile, ibhinqa ivakalelwa kukuba ilahlekile into ethile.
Kwaye, ngokuqinisekileyo, eshiywe ngaphandle komyeni, ibhinqa ivakalelwa kakhulu kwizinto eziphathekayo.
Kubonakala kuye ukuba yodwa indlela ephuma kule meko kukubuya komyeni wakhe. Kwaye akayi kukhutshwa yiyiphi na ingxabano yokuba akayena yedwa umntu kunye nolwalamano lwabo aluyinto ekhethekileyo.
Kwaye ukuba loo mntu wayeyedwa yedwa, ukubandezeleka kwanda nje. Oku kudla ngokulindela abafazi, ngokukhethekileyo ekunxibelelaneni. Njengomthetho, abantu abanjalo banesigxina esincinane sabahlobo abasondeleyo. Kwaye wonke umntu kulo mbuthano - "ngesisindo segolide." Ngamnye ufaniswa nomsebenzi oyingqayizivele wobugcisa, apho umntu akakwazi ukuhlawula ngokupheleleyo ukulahlekelwa komnye.
Kutheni wahamba?
Oku kukufuneka uzame ukuqonda kuqala. Yintoni engasweleyo ukuthetha nawe? Okanye mhlawumbi into yayingekho? Ngaphandle kwe mfuneko? Musa ukukhawuleza ukuphendula lo mbuzo obalulekileyo. Cinga ngenyameko. Nangona indoda, ishiya, ayikwazi ukucacisa ngokucacileyo amabango akhe. Abantu abaninzi banqanda ukuthetha ngeengxaki ezibuhlungu kunye nokutshintsha isizathu esiyinyaniso sokukhohlisa.
Ukuze uqiniseke ukuba uyayiqonda ngokufanelekileyo izizathu zokuphuka kwakho, khumbula kwakhona, ziziphi iimeko apho umyeni wakho ehlala ephazamise isimo sakhe sengqondo. Xa athe wangenisa endlwini iqabane labahlobo abaqhathayo, kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo ubetha izitya ekhitshini, ungacingi ukuba kuyimfuneko ukufihla ukungathandeki? Okanye xa udlala nomnye umntu? Okanye xa unqanda "ngokuzithoba" ekujongeni ibhola kunye neengxoxo eziphinda zingekho nemali kwaye akajongani nabantwana?
Xa ufumanisa ukuba kutheni umyeni ushiye, cinga ukuba ungamnika oko akufunayo, ukuba unelinye ithuba. Ukuba usacinga ukuba iminqweno yakhe iyimfuneko yokumiswa, kwaye umyeni ufuna imfundo kwakhona, akufaneleki ukuzama ukuyibuyisela. Kungcono ukujonga ngaphaya komnye umntu onemfuno zakhe eziya kuhambelana neyakho.
Imigaqo yokucacisa ubudlelwane
Thetha naye. Kodwa kuphela ngaphandle kwezikhalazo, izikhalazo kunye nezizathu. Ekubeni indoda isele ikulungele oku kwangaphambili kwaye ilungiselela ukuhlaziya. Ukuba ubuncinane isityholo esisuka emlonyeni wakho okanye sifunda ingcikivo emehlweni akho, ingxoxo yonke iya kuba yinkqutyana yokucacisa ubudlelwane, okuya kuqhubeka kukususa. Bonisa ukuba uyavuma ngokupheleleyo inkululeko yakhe kwaye ungabanga nto. Ndifuna nje ukuqonda into eyenzekayo, apho uphosakele khona. Ngamnye wethu akalulaphulaphula ngokukhawuleza ebomini abantu abambalwa abanokumelana nesilingo sokuthetha kwabo.
Musa ukuxoxa: "Ndiyathembisa ukuphucula, kwaye ubuyela kwintsapho." Kwindoda, inxaxheba yecala liyakunxibelelana nomvakalelo wothando, kumntu - kuphela kwiimeko ezinqabile "ezingavamile". Ungatshintshi ukuzonwabisa, kwithuba elithile, kodwa luhle kwaye luhle. Ngenxa yokuba baqonda ukufaneleka komntu. Ngenxa yokuba, utshintshile, ufunde ukuphulaphula, ukuqonda nokuhlonela iminqweno yabanye. Safunda ukuzihlonela. Ungayibonakali nayiphi na indlela ukuba ulungele ukulinda ngonaphakade.