Uthandane ubudlelwane: gcina umgama okanye uchithe kwiqabane

Yiba yinye-kwaye uya kuvuya. Okanye akunjalo? UEstere Perel, ingcali yobudlelwane kunye namava engama-30 kunye nombhali wencwadi ethi "Ukuzaliswa ekuthunjweni," uxela indlela yokwenza ubuhlobo obude kunye neqabane elonwabileyo.

Ngokukhawuleza xa uthando lokuqala luwela, lo mbhangqwana ubhekene nobunzima bokuqala: ukukhula okungaqondakaliyo, kukho ukubambisana kunye nokuhlambalaza, kwindawo ethile ilahlekelwe yintando, ukuphefumlelwa kunye neentlungu zamabhobhofubhe esiswini. Abaninzi bakholelwa ukuba ezi ngxaki zibangelwa ukungabikho kokusondelelana kwamaqabane. Nangona kunjalo, amava kaEstere Perel amvumela ukuba aphendule. Ubusondelene kakhulu ... kakhulu!

Ibali lonothando. Ukuqala

Xa siqhelana nomntu, siyakhathazwa yi-flor of mystery. Luhlobo luni lomntu lo? Yintoni ayithandayo kwaye uyayithiya? Ziziphi iingcamango ezivusayo kusasa kwaye zikhathaza ntoni ebusuku? Kancinci, thina ngokubanzi siyaqonda umntu kwaye sinamava enamandla okomzimba kunye nomoya. Kodwa inkohliso kukuba nangona kungekho nengozi okwamanje: imida yangempela ayisaphuli. Ngenxa yokuba iqabane liqhubeka "terra incognita" kuthi - umhlaba ongenakulinganiswa - asikwazi ukungena ngokucacileyo kwindawo yakhe. Ubudlelwane abuyi kuchithwa ngokuqhelekileyo kwaye rhoqo, abantu basalokhu bahlala kubini abazimeleyo. Yaye yindawo esivumela ukuba baphuphe, bacabange, banwabe kunye nemvakalelo yabo.

Kodwa ixesha lihamba, kwaye ngamnye ngokuthe ngcembe uyangena kwihlabathi elifihlakeleyo kwelinye. Iimvakalelo ezikhawulezayo zisenayo, kodwa uyika. Awufuni ukuba iphele. Kwaye ke ukukhangela iindlela zokwenza uthando oluqikeleleke, oluzinzile, oluthembekileyo luqala. Utshintshisa izibhambathiso zakho zokuqala kunye nezithembiso, ukuthenga ukunyamezela okufutshane ngentlawulo yenkululeko. Hayi, kungekhona bonke. Unika inkululeko encinci inkululeko. Kodwa ngaphezu kweminyaka ifuna ngaphezulu nangaphezulu. Abalingani bazana bayazi kakuhle kwaye bhetele. Kodwa loo nto yendiza, eyahamba kunye neenyanga zokuqala zeentlanganiso, iyahamba. Kwakungenxa yokuba bobabini babecinga ukungaqiniseki, imfihlelo, imfihlakalo. Ngoku basondele kakhulu kangangokuthi banokugubha ngenxa yokungabi nalutho kunye nenkululeko yokuthatha isenzo. Ubungakanani bamba yonke into.

I golide ithetha

Uthando lulinganisa kwiintsika ezimbini: ukuzimisela ukuvelisa, oko kukuthi, ngexesha elifanelekileyo lokunciphisa, kunye nokuzimela. Ukuwa othandweni, sifuna ukuhlala sisondelene nomntu, ukuziva ukufudumala kwezandla zakhe nokuphefumla, ukuxoxa ngezinto zonke kunye nokuthanda. Kwaye ngexesha elifanayo, wonke umntu udinga indawo ekhululekile. Omnye akakwazi ukuhlala ngaphandle komnye.

Vula, wabelane, uvule, uvule ngakumbi, lube lubala ... kwaye yintoni elandelayo? Ukuba umgama ukhulu kakhulu, akunakwenzeka ukuseka uxhumo lomzwelo. Ukuba umgama awukho kwaye amaqabane adibana kunye, ukuzimela kuyaphela. Lo mbutho uthatha indawo yawo yobuntu - akukho nanye yomntu womnye umntu, loo ndawo eyimfihlo apho iqabane lakhe lifuna ukuya khona. Kwaye ekubeni ezi zinto zibe yinto ethile, uxhumano lulahlekile: kutheni udibanisa lowo sele unayo yonke? Kubonakala ukuba ukungahambelani kusemthethweni kwaye kuyimfuneko ebalulekileyo yokuveliswa koqhagamshelwano, ukuvakalelwa, ukuthandana nokuthandana. Le yinto engundoqo yokwahlula elele entliziyweni yolwalamano olonwabileyo.

Ulonwabo lu

Iintlukwano zobudlelwane naziphi na izinto zibandakanya ukuthatha inxaxheba kwamaqela amabini. Indoda nomfazi kuphela abanokwenza intsimi yabo yokutsala-engadini apho uthando, ukunyamezela kunye nolonwabo olungenamkhawulo luyalinywa. Ngesizathu esifanayo, umntu akanakutsho ukuba umntu ubeka ityala ngento ethile - umzekelo, ekulahlekelweni komnqweno wangaphambili kunye nelangatye-bobabini abalingani bazisa into yabo kulwalamano oluchaphazela umphumo. Abasetyhini bavakalelwa kukuba, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha bayayichaza into engalunganga, benqaba yonke into ngenxa yothando. Oku kubi. Ukushiya yonke imikhosi ukuze kulungelelaniswe, kubonakala kuye, ubudlelwane, iqabane lilibala ngokuzithanda kwakhe - akayi kuphinda abuyele echibini ("iDarling ayithandi ukubhukuda!") Yaye iphosa igama layo ("I-bunny yam inobungozi!") wenqaba ukudibana nabahlobo, kwaye kunye kunye kunye nokuphazamisa ngokupheleleyo ukunxibelelana. Yonke le mizamo ijoliswe ukudibanisa nentanda. Yimangaliswa yintoni, xa yonke into ichanekile. Umnqweno wakhe onamandla wokwenza iqabane elihle kwaye unike nayiphi na into kunciphisa umgama ukuya kumncinci kwaye ucacise inxalenye yothando. Yintoni inomdla wokuba nomntu olungele ukwenza nantoni na, ukuba unelisekile kuphela? Isiza somnqobi kumadoda siphakamise kwi-99% yamatyala. Bafuna ukunqandwa nokuxhatshazwa. Bafuna ukumthabatha lo mfazi kumntu, kwaye bangafikeli isitya sesilivere.

Iresiphi yeentsapho ezonwabileyo

Yaye iintlobo zothando, kunye neentsholongwane. Ukuba uqaphela ukuba ubudlelwane buba buhlungu, zama ukubuyisela ukuzimela kwakho. Awunanto yokwakha ubomi malunga nesiqingatha sesibini. Khumbula ukuba uthanda apho ungathanda ukuya khona nento oyenzayo. Ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa ngumntu kunye nokuzama ukuhlawulela ukungabikho kwenkululeko yakhe akunakukuguqula - ukuze ulahlekelwe ngumntu othandayo. Khuphula aphantsi, onqabileyo, kodwa udonga phakathi kwakho. Ubuncinane kwithuba elithile. Yaye uya kuqonda ukuba akufanele uzinqande ukuze ufumane uthando. Usuke ufanelekile. Uthando ngaphandle kokulahlekelwa inkululeko lunokwenzeka. Ngaphezu koko, nguye oqinisekisa uxolo olude nolunaphakade. Zama ukugcina indawo yamahhala phakathi kwakho kunye neqabane-kwaye umangaliswe yiphumo! Ngokusekelwe kwincwadi ethi "Ukuzaliswa ekuthunjweni"