Inhlanhla okanye ukuzisola, kodwa amazwe ase-post-Soviet, ngakumbi iRussian Federation, yenye yezona zikhokelayo kwihlabathi ngokulingana nomtshato. Ngokwezibalo ezisemthethweni, esekelwe kubalo lokugqibela ngo-2002, abantu abangaphezu kwama-800,000 baye bahlukanisa kweli lizwe. Xa kubalwa umyinge, kuvela ukuba kuyo yonke imitshato engama-1000, kukho u-800 umtshato. La manani aphazamisa ingqondo, kodwa ngokugqithiseleyo, imeko yengqondo eyenzeka emva kokuba umtshato uqhaqhaqhe. Njengomthetho, umqalisi womtshato ngumntu, kodwa akuqhelekanga ukuba umfazi ahlukanise njengomlinganiselo wesigqibo seemvakalelo.
Izizathu ziyakwazi ukuhluka, nantso inyaniso ihlala, iimvakalelo ziye zaphela, kwaye abantu abanako ukuhlangana kunye. Okubalulekileyo, ukuba umtshato uqhotyoshelwe ngumlingane, ulindele ukulandela ingcamango engavamile yomlingane. Ngokuqhelekileyo xa umyeni ebekezela ngolu hlobo, ubuncinci kumaxesha amaninzi, kukho ukuhlaselwa, ukuphazamiseka, ubundlobongela basekhaya. Ukuze ugweme iziganeko ezinjalo eziphambili, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba umfazi uza kuxela njani umyeni wakhe ngomtshato ozayo.
Okokuqala, kubalulekile ukuba uthethe ukuba akufanelekile ukuthetha nomlingane wakho ngesigqibo sakho malunga nomtshato. Le ndawo yokuqala ingaba ingxaki kuwe. Ngaphambi kokuqhawula umtshato, kukulungele ukuthetha nomntu kwangaphambili, ukuziva imeko yakhe yengqondo, ukulungela kwakhe ukusinda kule imeko yobomi. Ewe, ewe, amadoda, naphezu kobugwenxa kunye nenkalipho, basengozini kakhulu kwimicimbi enjalo. Ngokweengqondo, umntu unokwenziwa nje ngokulingana, okungaba yinto embi kuye, kwaye akudingeki ukuba ube nephutha kuwe, nokuba ngaba ungathanga ngqo, uphoso! Kwangoko kwintombi emininzi, kunemibuzo eminingi kwisitayela "malunga nokuba kuyintoni into enqwenelekayo ukuthetha nomyeni ngaphambi komtshato?". Kulo mbuzo, akukho ngqapheli omnye wengqondo ongaphendula.
Okokuqala, ngenxa yeso sizathu sokuba kukho ulwahlulo oluthile, ukuthetha ngokuqhawula umtshato, kumyeni oye wahlala naye ngaphezu kweminyaka eyi-10, kunye nomyeni onobudlelwane obufutshane naye. Ukuba uhlala nomyeni wakho kwiminyaka engaphezulu kwe-10, ngoko umbandela weqabane lakho uza kudlala indima enkulu. Mhlawumbi ube nexesha lokufunda yonke imilinganiselo yakhe nemvakalelo, ngoko kufuneka uxoxe nomyeni wakho ngaphambi komtshato malunga neengxaki ezifanayo. Umzekelo, ukuxelela (mhlawumbi ukukhohlisa) ibali leqhawulo-mtshato eyenzeka kwintombi yakho, ngokungaqhelekanga njengokuba uhlekisayo ungayila umzekelo, ubeke endaweni. Jonga indlela indoda ephendula ngayo. Ukuba uthe cwaka okanye uvinjelwe, kuthetha ukuba ulungele kwisigaba esinqumlekileyo kwisiganeko seemeko, ukuba kukho iziganeko ezigwenxa, kwindlela "yinto enjani engafaniyo", njl., Oku kubonisa ngokucacileyo ukuba kufuneka uyilungiselele ngakumbi .
Ukuba kukho umzuzu xa kuyimfuneko ukuthetha ngokuqhawula ngokwaso, yenza oko ngezwi elizithembayo, ngelixa ungayikhothanga loo ndoda. Ungatsho ukuba i-hitch yonke kuyo, kwiimeko ezinzima, zithi, "yiyiphi ienkwenkwezi eziye zayalela." Ukuzikhukhumeza kwamadoda apha akufanelekanga. Ukuthetha nomyeni wakho ngaphambi komtshato - kuhlala kunzima. Uloyiko lwangaphakathi kunye noxinzelelo. Kodwa, ukuthetha ngaphambi kokuba uqhawule umtshato neqabane liyimfuneko. Kuyimfuneko kwaye, okokuqala, kukho ukuzinza kwakho nokuthula. Kodwa yintoni omele uxoxe ngayo nomyeni wakho ngaphambi komtshato, sele usayazi, emva kokufunda eli nqaku.