Yintoni endiyenzayo?
Makhe sibone ukuba kuya kwenzeka ntoni ukuba usayinikela umntwana? Ngenxa yoko, uyazi ngokucacileyo ukuba iziganeko zakhe zokuziphatha kunye nokuziphatha kakubi ziza kusombulula ubunzima bakhe, kuba abazali nangayiphi na imeko baya kuphuma kuye. Sincoma ukuba singenzi iimpazamo ezikhokelela ekuziphatheni okubi komntwana.
Xa inkwenkwe ingenakufumana into ayifunayo, iqhubezela abahlaziyi kwindawo yoluntu. Olu hlobo luyingxenye yomkhwa kwaye ulawula abazali ukuba bafezekise iinjongo zabo. Umntwana ucinga: mhlawumbi anganikezela, okanye afune ukuziphatha kwam okubi. Zonke iintlobo zale ndlela yabantwana zisetyenziselwa ukuphatha abazali babo.
Iingcebiso ezimbalwa zokunciphisa i-hysteria
Ungakhohlwa ukuba akukho mntu owaziyo umntwana wakho kangcono kunakho
Nonke niyazi malunga naye ukuba ukhathele okanye uxinekile. Kwaye kubaluleke kakhulu, uyazi ukuba uncedo njani. Yilungiselele, yitsho ukuba ukuba uziva utyhilekile, ngoko uya kuthatha ikhefu kwaye uphumle. Yaye ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba akanako ukuma kwakhona-uya kubuyela ekhaya. Yaye ukuba uthetha ulungelelwano, uya kubuyela ekhaya. Ukuba ngaba abazali bafunde ubunjani bomntwana wabo, xubusha naye ngezicwangciso zangaphambili, kulula kakhulu ukuba aziphathe kakuhle, ngokukodwa kwindawo yentlalo.
Tame umntwana wakho, kodwa ngokuthe ngcembe
Ukuba uyazi ngobunzima bomntwana kwiindawo zikawonkewonke, zama ukumthoba kancane kancane kuyo. Ngamanye amagama, ukuba umntwana akanako ukumelana nokunyuka kwinqanaba lokuthenga, qalisa, umzekelo, kunye nekhemisi. Mxelele ukuba ujonge ukuziphatha kwakhe kwaye uqhubeke imizuzu embalwa. Kufuneka uchonge ngokucacileyo yonke imigaqo. Ngoko unako ukulawula imeko yomntwana kunye nokuziphatha kwakhe. Qala encinci, fundisa umntwana ukuba akwazi ukuthetha naye, asombulule ingxaki kwaye enze ngokuchanekileyo.
Imithetho embalwa
Ngaphambi kokuba uphume kwihlabathi, kufuneka uqaphele ngokucacileyo yonke imithintelo ehambelana nokuziphatha. Abantwana bafanele bazi ngokuqinisekileyo imiphumo yabo yokuziphatha kakubi.Ukuphuhliswa kwabantwana abavela kwi-9 ukuya kwimi-12 ubudala ubudala, gcina kwimoto ikhadi eliza kubeka imithetho emithathu:
- ukususela okokuqala ukuphendula xa becela into ethile
- igama ayiyiyo impendulo
- ukuziphatha kwaye ungakhulisi ilizwi lakho
Khumbuza umntwana wale mithetho ingentla ngaphambi kokutyelela ivenkile okanye indawo yokuthenga. Oku kuya kunceda umntwana ukuba angalahleki, njengoko ukubetha le mithetho kusiza umntwana ukuba athuthukise ukuziphatha kwakhe.
Umzekelo, imeko: ukhutshelwe isohlwayo sokukhawuleza, ngexesha elizayo uza kukhwela, uya kukhunjulwa ngale mzuzu ongathandekiyo kwaye awuyi kudlulela umda wokukhawuleza. Isebenza ngokwenene! Apha sithatha umzekelo iMelika, kuzo zonke iindawo nganye kwiikhilomitha ezili-10 ungabona uphawu lomda wokukhawuleza. Yingakho kufuneka ukhuthaze ingqwalasela yengqalelo yomntwana wakho kunye nawo wonke umntu ukukhupha izikhumbuzo ezifanelekileyo.
Ukuba imithetho iyaphulwa
Ukuba imigaqo esekelweyo ayisebenzi kumntwana kwaye iqala ukuhlaziya, kuyimfuneko ukumthabatha. Ukuba uqala u-hysterical, qhubeka ude ade angayigqiba kwaye amkhuphe ngaphandle kwevenkile emva koko. Umboniso uphelile, ininzi yentengo!
Ukuba umntwana usemncinci, ungayikhipha kwisitore ngesandla. Ukuba kunjalo, awudingi ukusebenzisa amandla. Makhe acwangcise umsindo, kodwa jonga nje, uphendule abantu abaxakekileyo ababahlazileyo, kodwa awukwazi ukumchaphazela nangayiphi indlela. Ngoko kuyimfuneko yokwenza njalo, de kube umntwana engaphelelanga ukuxubusha abahlaziyi kwiindawo zikawonkewonke. Ukuba unako, thabatha izandla zeencwadi okanye enye iphephancwadi ukuze uqonde ukuba awuyikuhlawula nayiphi na imibala yakhe.
Ewe, unokuba neentloni. Nangona kunjalo, kufuneka uqaphele ukuba umntwana uyatshata, ukuba uya kuba neentloni ukubuyela emva kwaye ulandele iimfuno zakhe. Umntwana uyaqiniseka ukuba uya kuvelisa, kungenjalo uya kudibanisa kwaye akuhlazise phambi komntu wonke, abeke kwisimo esinamahloni.
Khumbula ukuba ukuba ungagqithisi ukucaphukisa abantwana, bazama ukufumana enye indlela yokusombulula ingxaki.
Makhe umntwana ahlale ekhaya
Akukho nto embi ukushiya umntwana wakho phantsi kwengqalelo kwendlu. Mxelele ukuba akayi kuhamba nawe, kuba ekugqibeleni wayeziphatha kakubi kwaye akazange alawulwe ukulawula ukuziphatha kwakhe. Emva koko wavutha ngumsindo, ngoko namhlanje uhlala ekhaya.
Ukuba umntwana ekucela ukuba uhambe nawe kwaye uthembisa ukuziphatha kakuhle, mxelele ukuba ufuna ukujonga indlela aza kuziphatha ngayo ekhaya, kwaye ukuba yonke into iyahamba kakuhle, emva koko uya kuthatha nawe. Uze ushiye umntwana ekhaya. Makhe aqonde ukuba awuyi kunqanda kwi-blackmail yakhe, ukuba unomntu onamandla kwaye awugatye izigqibo!
Ezi ndlela ziza kunceda ukulungisa umntwana wakho osisigxina kwaye umenze abe noxanduva. Musa ukumjezisa ngokunyanzela, ungayifaki ekhoneni, ungadandisi. Akayi kukunyamezela nantoni na, ngaphandle kokwesaba ukukhubeka kunye neebhere ezizinzulu. Zama ukusondela kwingxaki njengengcali yeengqondo. Chaza, yenza ucinge malunga nesizathu nesiphumo. Xoxa, cacisa, kwaye xa unokuziva uziva ungaxhatshazi, qhagamshelana nomntwana wengqondo. I-dastavam icebiso elungileyo, kwaye uthetha nomntwana kwaye uncede uqonde impazamo. Imfundo yinto enomsebenzi onzima, ongafanele uyilibale!