Kwizombusazwe, ukuguquka kokuphila nokujika kweenkwenkwezi zezorhwebo kunye neeHollywood ezenzakaliso, malunga nezithethe eziphathekayo kwinkonzo, ukuziphatha koogxa kunye neengcali ze-intloko. Kodwa ngokukodwa, awukwazi ukuphosa amagama ngaphandle kwengoma, sithanda ukuxoxa nabantu abaqhelekileyo, abahlobo kunye nezihlobo. Iingqungquthela zithi sizinikezele malunga ne-65% yeengxoxo zethu kule sihloko esibusisiweyo! Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ekubeni ininzi lethu lithinteke kakhulu kulo, kuthetha ukuba siyayidinga kwaye sizise inzuzo. Kodwa ngakwelinye icala, sonke sifundiswa ukususela kwimini yokuqala ukuba akulungile ukuxoxa nomntu, kodwa ukubandakanya inhlebo okanye "abangenabungozi" abafazi "" umdlalo "ngakumbi nakakhulu! Kwaye akukho namnye umntu othanda ukunyelona "malunga namaxesha kunye namasiko" ayicinga intsingiselo yehlathi "yokuhleka". Ngoko uyifumana njani phakathi phakathi kwento yonke malunga namahemuhemu kunye neentlebo?
Umzuzu omhle . Ngokwenzululwazi, ukuhleka kweentlobo kwakukho nangaphantsi kwenkqubo yoqhagamshelwano. Zijongwa njengenye yeendlela zokuphuhlisa intetho. Ewe, ngoku ulwimi lwethu lucebile kwaye lucingela, kodwa sisengxoxweni. Kutheni? Inkohliso inomzuzu owodwa: baxela imigaqo ofuneka ukuyidlala ngayo kunye nemida ongayifumani. Umzekelo, uhambile. Nabamelwane kwi-staircase xa badibanisa ukuxoxisana nabaqeshi bangaphambili: "Kuhle ukuba baphume. Bonke ixesha badlala umculo, kunye neengxowa zokulahla iintsuku eziliqela zazimi emnyango wendlu. " Ngoxa uncedo lwale ntsomi, abamelwane bakuxelela: akufanele ukwenze oku.
Kwaye silapha ukuhlambalaza okanye "abangenabungozi" abafazi "" umdlalo ". Isaga esaziwayo sithi inhlebo ibulala bonke abathathi-nxaxheba abathathu: umlandisi, umphulaphuli kunye "nomtyholi." Yaye akade kwi nyaniso. Ngokomzekelo, ukhangele umsebenzi ixesha elide, ungavumelani neendlela apho kukho "imivumba". Kwaye ukhetho lwakho luzilungele ngokwalo: wanikwa isithuba esifanelekileyo, okuthi, ngaphezu koko, yayingaphezulu kokuhlawulwa ngokukhululekile. Ngaphandle kwakho uvuyo, wabelana ngeendaba ezilungileyo kunye nabahlobo abaninzi. Kodwa abazange bathande ukukhula komsebenzi wakho. Kwaye emva kweentsuku ezimbalwa, phakathi kwabaqhelana nabo, kwakukho amahemuhemu ukuba loo mivuzo yayilinde iminyaka emithathu ukuba ufumene le ndawo ngenxa yento engaziwayo kwaye ukuba awukwazi ukuyenza. Ufikile oko, xa udibana neentsapho zakho, gomushki unomdla njengoko unayo, usasebenza? Ucinga ntoni, ukuhlasela oku kuphele njani? Kwiinyanga ezimbalwa, isithuba sakho sinokunqunyulwa. Enyanisweni, umntu unokuthi i-ntlekele iyinto yokusola, kodwa ngenxa yezizathu ezithile kubonakala ukuba amagama abanye, ngaphezu koko, akhankanywa ngokuqhelekileyo, uya kwenza nenxalenye yabo. Kukho ukuhleka kunye nokunciphisa omnye. Ngokombono weengqondo zeengqondo, ngokuqhelekileyo umntu uxoxa ngokuthe ngqo kokuntuleka komnye onzima ukuba adibanise naye.
Olu hlobo lolokhuseleko lwengqondo, oluye ludlala luhlazo olubi. Emva kokumisa kwaye ngokugqithiseleyo ukukhupha ilizwi langaphakathi ngexesha, esithi "Awufezekanga!", Lo mntu uphoswa ebaluleke kakhulu: ingxaki yakhe, ingxaki ayizange ihambe, ngenxa yokuba akazange asebenze kuye, ngoko akasebenzi.
Musa ukunyuswa! Njengoko ubona, iindlebe kunye neentlebo zinezibini zombini (ngubani oya kucinga?), Kunye neqhinga. Ngaba kukulungile ukuxoxa nomntu okanye akunjalo? Ukuba ngaba malunga nezihlobo okanye abahlobo bakho, soloko ulandela umgaqo: "Ndiyathetha kuphela iindaba ezilungileyo. Ukuba andinakuyithetha into enhle, ndingcono ukuba ndingathethi nto. " "Ukukhutshwa" kunokuthi, ukuxoxa nabahlobo, yintoni ingubo engaqhelekanga uJulia Roberts ebeka umkhosi "Oscar" okanye ukuba uZhanna Friske uya kutshata. Kodwa kuthekani ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba uxoxela into ebukhali, kodwa ingabonakali kakhulu ngomntu ovela kubantu ofuna?
Iingcali zengqondo kule meko zinika iingcebiso. Hlaziya zakho iimvakalelo. Hlonipha nje wena. Zama ukuqonda oko kwenza ukuba ufuna ukubumba. Uziva ntoni ngomntu ofuna ukuxoxa naye? Usizi? Nomsindo? Umona? Kungenzeka ukuba ucinga kakuhle, uya kuqonda: intloko yenkinga ayikho into yokuhleba, kodwa kuwe. Cinga ngento echazwe ngento enhle kulo mntu. Kuya kuthintela njani ubomi bakho, ekuqalekeni, amagama angenacala. Emva koko, ngaphandle kokufuna, unokwenza umonakalo omkhulu. Kwaye ukuba "mbulelo" ngaba uya kuba neendumiso eziya kuphazamisa idumela lomntu okanye lichaphazele kakubi ubomi bakho? Akunakwenzeka ukuba ufuna ukuthwala uxanduva olunjalo. Kwenzeka ukuba sihlebe ngenxa yokuba akukho nto yokwenza, ngenxa yegama elibomvu. Nathi akukho nto eyenzekayo, kodwa ubomi babanye abantu bupheka nje. Gcwalisa iziganeko ngobomi bakho: thola umdlalo omtsha, ubhalise echibini, uye kwiikhosi zokuqhuba. Unokuqiniseka ukuba ixesha "Ngaba uyazi ukuba isiphi isipho esibuhlungu umyeni wakho asinikele ku-Angela?" Akayi kuhlala.