Ukuqala.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuba nzima kangakanani ama-feminists, umyalelo we-patriarchal usenamandla kakhulu. Ukususela kumaxesha amandulo, amadoda avunyelwe kakhulu, iiveki kubafazi kwaye avunyelwe nanamhla. Konke oku kulungiswa kwezesayensi, kodwa akungcono kulo. Ngenxa yokunyanzela, indoda yakhe yayingenakucatshulwa okanye idideke, kuba ukutshutshisa umfazi wakhe wabethwa, kwaze kwaba sekufeni. Nangoku kukho iimeko ezinjalo zasendle.
Isibizo somonde sasiza ezininzi izizukulwana zabafazi zisinda. Ubume bendoda babulungelelaniswa nangayiphi na indlela, ngokokukhuthaza ugonyamelo. Ubonakaliso besibalo somlinganiso ovalelwe kwisikhokelo esicacileyo, ukuchaza indawo yaso ekhaya, kuluntu.
Akumangalisi ukuba kutheni amantombazana ekhetha amadoda abo abanokukwazi ukugonyamelo. Akumangalisi ukuba indoda enjalo ithola intombazana eye yabona ngokuphindaphindiweyo indlela uyise onjalo efundisa ngayo ubomi bomama. Umnqweno onqwenelekayo wokukhetha indoda efana noyise, kubasetyhini abaninzi ubonakalisa ngokungazi.
Kwakhona kwenzeka ukuba intombazana evela kwintsapho ecebileyo ishada kwaye ihlala nendoda iminyaka, ecinga ukuba ukuhlaselwa kuyinto evamile. Oku kungabangela ingozi ebulalayo, kwaye mhlawumbi umphumo wokuzithemba ophantsi kunye nesimo sengqondo sobutyala. Kwinyameko yomphefumlo, abaninzi abafazi banomuvo wokuba bafanelwe ngeso simo sengqondo, nangona kunjalo i-paradoxical ityandi.
Kuphawulwe ukuba ngaphezu koko umfazi ulungele ukuzidela, ngakumbi ukuzithiba, ukukhwele, nokukhupha, ukuphakamisa amathuba okuba nomntu onobuqili kumadoda akhe. Kwaye, ngokuphambene noko, amantombazana athembekileyo, anokuthi aziqhenyise ngokweqile, athambekele ukuba abe ngumtshutshisi kwintsapho. Kodwa abayikuzivumela oko.
Enyanisweni, ukuba ingxaki ekukhethweni kwamadoda, ubudlelwane obuya ngaphantsi kwimeko efanayo, xa ibhinqa lixhoba, likhona, ngoko kunokwenzeka ukuba lisuse kwiindlela zanamhlanje. I-Psychoanalysis kunye neengqondo zonke zihambele ngokukhawuleza ukukrazula abantu beengxaki ezithintela ukuba zivuyise.
Yintoni eyenzekayo ngokwenene.
Umbono kawonkewonke malunga nombambano wobundlobongela basekhaya awukude. Njengomthetho, bonke abaphendulayo kwesi sihloko baphendula ukuba ubundlobongela kuluntu lwangoku aluvumelekanga. Ngaphezu koko, amadoda namabhinqa abambelela ngombono ofanayo kulo mbandela. Kodwa oku kuphela yinto ezwakala ngamagama. Enyanisweni, izimvo malunga nale mpikiswano ziyahlukana.
Amadoda nabasetyhini abaninzi bakholelwa ukuba batshabalale kuphela abo bafanelwe kukuba, ukuba ukubetha kulungelelaniswe kwezinye iimeko ezingenzi lutho ngokuzikhusela. Abanye bayavuma ukuba ukubetha okungaqheleki kwenza ngcono, ncedise ukuyeka i-hysteria okanye ufundise into ethile. Phantse i-30% yamadoda ikholelwa ukuba oku kuqhelekileyo - ngezizathu ezahlukeneyo, kodwa bayaqiniseka ukuba abafazi bafanelwe ukubetha kwezinye iimeko.
Kubonakala kungaqhelekanga ukuba malunga nama-25% amabhinqa avumelana namadoda.
Oko kufuneka ukwenze.
Enyanisweni, ukuba awuyithandi indima yexhoba kwaye ufuna ukuguqula ubomi bakho, konke kuxhomekeke kuwe. Okokuqala, hamba phambi kokuba indoda iphakamise isandla sayo kuwe. Ukungaphumeleli kukuqala kungekho ngaphandle kwezinto kwaye kungenayo impawu, kudla ngokubonakalayo xa umntu ekulungele ukuwela umgca. Ungazami ukuqhayisa, hamba.
Okwesibini, ungacingi ukuba ushiya izinto ekhaya, kuza kwenzeka ntoni kuwe. Isigqibo sokwamkela siya kuba semva. Umsebenzi wakho wesibili ukuya kwindawo ephephile kubahlobo okanye kwiintsapho. Kwiimeko ezinzima, qhagamshelana namapolisa.
Ukuba ukubetha kwabangelwa, musa ukulibazisa. Idilesi kumapolisa, nangona uvakalelwa ngayo lo mntu kwaye, nangona uvakalelwa kukuba unetyala ngalo. Ukuba ungathethi nto, uya kukhuthaza ukuba uzame ukuphinda uyiphinde.
Yizisa amangqina, ngubani na onokuba ngabona bonke abakubonayo imiqondiso yokubetha.
Okwesithathu, ungashiyi ilizwe lakho njengoko kunjalo. Faka isicelo sokuncedisa ngengqondo kumaziko akhethekileyo okanye kwii-psychologists zangasese.
Okwesine, musa ukunyamezela ukuxolela nokukholelwa isithembiso somntu sokuba le yithuba lokugqibela. Njengomthetho, xa beva amandla abo, kunzima ukuba abantu babe khona. Cinga ngethuba elizayo xa abantwana bakho beba kwindawo yakho.
Inkululeko kunye nethuba lokuphila ubomi obonwabileyo kunye nomntu ofanelekileyo ngakumbi kunani xabisa kakhulu kunezo nxu lumano olulahlekileyo ngenxa yesizathu esinzima. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, uthando lomntu alufanele lugqithise ngakumbi uthando lwakhe. Kwimeko nayiphi na imeko, ukhetho malunga nendlela yokuphila, nokuba yintlanzi okanye umntu onoyolo - kufike kuwe.