Kodwa emva kwayo yonke into, ukuziphatha kakubi kwiintlalontle zentsapho kunye nezoshishino kwindlela eqhelekileyo yokuziphatha ayikwazi ukubalelwa. Ngenxa yoko, namhlanje asiyi kuhlalutya umbuzo wendlela yokufunda indlela yokuphatha abantu, kodwa indlela yokuguqulela ubudlelwane kunye nabasebenzi bezandla kwiindlela ezakhayo.
Ukuziphatha okukhohlisayo kukuziphatha okubangela ukuba umntu enze into abangenayo okanye abayifuniyo, ngokuvisisana nentando yakhe. Abaninzi abanolwazi abanokufumana izinto bangenza izinto zijikeleze ukwenzela ukuba into yokuxhaphaza ayifuni ukuba i-pawn yomdlalo womnye umntu.
Kukholelwa ukuba abafazi banokukwazi ukuphatha ukuziphatha. Ngokuqhelekileyo basebenzisa zonke izakhono zabo zokwenza ukukhuthaza umntu ukuba enze oko akufunayo. Enyanisweni, yonke into ayilula. Amadoda, nawo, angasebenzisa ibhinqa. Kuphela ukusetyenziswa kwabo kuhlambalaza kwaye kubangela ukulimala kakhudlwana kwengqondo kunye nokuziphatha kubantu abajikeleze umlindi wesilisa.
Enye into engafanelekanga enxulumene nokuziphatha kakubi kwiintlalontle zentsapho kukuba abantu abasoloko bengaqapheli ukunyanzelisa, ngoko ke abafazi banakho ukuphatha amadoda ngaphezu kwenkcaso. Le ngenye yezinto ezinobungozi kakhulu ezinobomi bentsapho, okuphela kuphela. Inyani kukuba i-psychologists sele ifumene ukuba amadoda angcono kunabasetyhini ababona zonke iindlela. Kuphela nje ukuba banokukwazi ukunyamezela ixesha elide, baqhelise ngokucacileyo umfazi we-manipulator, kwaye musa ukuphikisa ngokucacileyo iinzame zokunyanzelisa. Nangona kunjalo, ukuxhaphazwa ngumfazi kunye nezinye izalamane kubangelwa ukuba umntu ahlasele. Unokuzibamba kwaye angabonakali ngomsindo ngandlela-thile. Kuphela kuphela kuza kuza iphuzu lokubilisa, emva koko angayikha umnyango aze ashiye intsapho ngonaphakade.
Okubaluleke kunabo bonke, ukuba indoda nomfazi bobabili babengabalandeli, kwaye baxhasana ngokubaluleka kwentlalo. Emva koko ilungu ngalinye lentsapho liziva lingavuyiswa, kwaye ukuphula isangqa esichukumisayo kunzima kakhulu. Enye yemizekelo yobudlelwane obunobungozi kumntu uchaza oko kuthiwa "iCartman triangle". Inamacala amathathu, iindima ezintathu - umbulali, ixhoba nomsindisi. Ingxaki kukuba akukho nxaxheba ekhoyo ngaphandle kweminye emibini. Ngoko ke, inzame yokwenza olunye uhlangothi kwiimeko eziwonakalisayo zokuziphatha kubangelwa ukuxhatshazwa ngokukrakra kwamanye amacala amabini, kwaye ke isihogo sangempela sivela kwiintsapho zentsapho. Kwaye ekusebenzeni okupheleleyo kwidrama, kunye neentlekele, akubandakanyi nje umyeni nomfazi kuphela, kodwa nabantwana, abazali bomtshato, abahlobo kunye nezihlobo.
Umzekelo oqhelekileyo we "Cartman triangle" kwintlanano yintsapho apho indoda iphatha umfazi wayo. Nguye "ixhoba" onokukwazi ukuzikhusela, ukukhusela umlomo okanye ulwabizo lomlomo. Yena-"umbulali", ongenako ukuma kwiinqwelo zakhe. Kwindima "umsindisi" angenza umkhwekazi, umntwana okhulile okanye intombi. Le nkqubo yokuziphatha, ihambelaniswe ngokugqithisileyo ukusuka kumacala onke, akulula ukutshabalalisa ngakwesinye icala. Ngenxa yokuba bonke abathathu abathathi-nxaxheba kwingxaki yenkcazo yonxibelelwano banokutshintsha indima. Kufanelekile ukuba "ixhoba" ukuvakalisa amalungelo akhe "kumenzi wokubulala", njengoko ngokukhawuleza ephenduka indima "yomsindisi" okanye "ixhoba." "Umsindisi" unokuba "njengexhoba" kuphela ngenxa yokuba "ummangaleli" ucasulwa yizenzo zale, ezama ukumnqumla ukuba asombulule iingxaki zeentsapho.
Amazwi, akulula ukuchaza le meko ewonakalisayo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba ubona ezinye iinkalo zontathu enxantathu kwimpumelelo yakho yomtshato, iya kuqeqesho ngaphandle kokulibala. Ukuqeqeshwa okuhlukeneyo kwiengqondo zentsapho, iingxabano zentsapho, zibonisa ukuphumeza iingxaki kwiqela. Ekuzilolweni, abantu bahlula zibe zintathu baze basebenze ngeengxaki ezichazweyo. Xa ubona konke ukunyanzeliswa kokuhlambalaza nokungenakuqulunqwa kwintlontathu yentlalontle kumava akho, kuya kuba lula ukuba uqonde ukuba wenzeni ngxaki yakho.
Intetho eyahlukileyo ifanelwe ukuphathwa ngabantu abangaziwayo kwiintsapho zabantu abanefuthe eliyingozi kwi microclimate yayo. Ngokukodwa nzima le mbhangqwana, apho omnye okanye bobabini bomtshato banomzali onokuzithengisa. ERashiya, maye, abazali baphazamisa ebomini bentsapho phantse ngaphambi kokuzalwa kwabazukulu. Ubukho bokuba ngumntu omdala onokubangela ubunzima bomtshato bomtshato. Wonke umntu uyazi i-anecdotes malunga noninazala okanye onyana boomama. AmaSoviet awanakunqunyelwa oomama abanamandla, kwaye ukuba intombi okanye unyana uyazama ukuba angenzi ngendlela ngokuthanda kwakhe, anokubandakanya iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokubaphatha.
Ngokomzekelo, unina womntwana omdala unako ukuzenza ugule ukuba amenze kuye rhoqo kangangoko kunokwenzeka. Kwaye kaninzi wenza imeko - ukuba wachitha kunye naye, kwaye kungekhona kunye nomfazi kunye nabantwana bakhe, iholide, bathatha inxaxheba kuzo zonke iziganeko zakhe zobomi, babingelela ixesha elithile elikhululekile kungekhona kwintsapho, kodwa benomzali osekhulile. Kwiintlobo ezinjalo, ukuphathwa kakubi ngumkhwekazi okanye umama-mkhwenkwe nako kuhamba kunye ne-vampirism yemvakalelo-uyazivuyisa xa ekwazi ukubonakalisa kwinzala yakhe ukuba umfazi wakhe okanye indoda ayifanele umntwana wakhe oyigugu. Kwaye naziphi na iimpizo phakathi kwabafazi bomntu onjalo-mbumbulu zikhuthaza kwaye ziyamangalisa.
Ungakwazi ukuchaza imizekelo emide yempembelelo engalunganga yokuxhaphaza ubudlelwane beentsapho. Kodwa kungcono ukuqonda indlela ephikisana nayo. Olu buchule ngaphandle kokwesaba nokuhlambalaza ukuvakalisa iimvakalelo zabo, ukubiza ukuba ungabonakali, ngokokuba akukho nto ichazwayo. Indlela efanelekileyo yokumelana nokukhwabanisa kukukwazi ukubonisa onke amanqaku ayo, ukuvelisa zonke iinjongo ezifihlakeleyo kunye neenjongo ze-manipulator. Ngale ndlela kubonisa ukuqiniswa kwengxabano okokuqala. Kufuneka uhambe ngoku, kuba oku kuphela oku kuya kubangela ukuphucula kwimeko. Futhi uhlale kude nezifundo ezifundisa abantu ukuba baphathe abanye, kuba akusiyo yonke indlela eya kulonwabo.