Ukuba unethamsanqa, kwaye umntwana wakho akayikwesaba izandi ezivakalayo, izitimela, izinja, ukwesaba okuhambisana nobusuku cishe akuzange kudlule. Uloyiko lobumntu, ubumnyama, "amaphupha amabi" aphantsi kwezingane ezininzi. Ungasindisa njani umntwana ukusinda ebusuku?
Ukwesaba kwabantwana ebusuku
Bavela phi?
Esi sifo kulula ukukhusela kunokunyanga. Lo mgaqo ungasetyenziselwa ukwesaba okuvela kwiintsana. Nangona ukwesaba kukukhuselwa kwendalo yengqondo, umntu akanakucinga ngomntwana ongeyiyo nayiphi na into kwaye akakwazi ukujamelana neemeko apho umntwana uya kuziva ukwesaba nokuxhalabisa ixesha elide ekudibanisaneni nento ethile.
Izizathu zokubonakala kwesoyiko zingabaliswa ngamabali, iikhathuni okanye ifilimu "kwisihloko esinikwe." Kakade ke, akunakwenzeka rhoqo ukulawula umphumo wale nto kubantu abadala. Yintoni enokuyenza?
Zama ukungavumeli ezinye izalamane ebusweni bomntwana zixelele ubusuku babo kunye namanye amava. Umhlaba wokuba ukwesaba ukwenziwa ngabantu abadala, amabali awaxelelwa ngabantu abadala njengemizekelo efundisayo, kodwa eqinisweni esongela umntwana. Ewe, umntwana kufuneka azi ukuba awukwazi ukuphuma kunye nomfokazi okanye uthetha naye.
Ungakhethi
Iingcamango zomntwana zenza ukuba kubekho ukwesaba ebusuku kumntwana kwaye kunceda ukulwa nalo. Umntwana ngokwakhe udala umfanekiso othusayo. Iingcamango ezicebileyo kunye nengcamango baba ngumthombo wamava kunye nemifanekiso eyoyikisayo. Abantwana abanomdla bachukumiswa ngamabali ahlukeneyo. Ukuba wayekrokrela ukuba umntwana wayethusa ibali lomntu, mxelele amabali amabhinqa, kwaye ukuba umntwana wayethusa ibali, wabuya nebali elifanayo kunye nokuphela okuthakazelisayo.
Ingane inokuyipopela ukwesaba kwayo, ize ibhubhise umzobo. Makhe umntwana azi ukuba ukwesaba "kunokutshatyalaliswa", ukuba uyayilahla. Ukuba umntwana uyesaba ukuba ama-troll awonayo aphuma phantsi kombhede ebusuku, ungazami ukumgxeka, ungamxeleli ukuba akayi kufumana khona. Mxelele nje ukuba uTata sele sele efaka ucingo lomlingo kwaye abanako ukufikelela kulo.
Musa ukwenza iimpazamo
Abaninzi abantu abadala bayayenza kwaye bathi, into engenakunceda kakhulu, ukuze umntwana akhuphe ukwesaba. Musa ukuthi "Ufana nenkwenkwe enkulu, kodwa usenokuba noyiko." Oku akuyi kusebenza, umntwana uya kucinga nje ukuba awufuni ukuyiqonda. Ungabi neentloni kwaye ungamangaleli umntwana ngenxa yokwesaba. Nangona ukuba "yindoda ezayo", oku akuthethi ukuba ngaloo mzuzu akanalo ilungelo lokwesaba.
Akunakho konke ukwethusa
Unokwenza indawo "yendawo" kwindawo yokuhlala ngokuncediswa ngamalebula e-fluorescent, imifanekiso yendawo yee-comets kunye neenkwenkwezi kwiplanga kunye neendonga. Okanye ukhethe kunye nebhokhwe ngobusuku bokukhanya ngohlobo lwenja, kodwa njengokuba wayemthanda umntwana, uya "kukhusela" umntwana. Ungathenga isibane ngesimo selanga, kuya kukhanyisa kwigumbi labantwana nakubusuku. Ebudeni bemihla, zama ukuhlawula ngakumbi umntwana wakho, umntwana ufuna ukuba uhlale naye, kwaye imfuneko yokuqhagamshelana nomntu omdala kunye nokwesaba ukuxhwala uthetha ukungabikho kokuthintana nomntwana. Kwaye ngokuhlwa, uya kuyika ukwesaba "ubumnyama" kwiindawo zokulala.
Ukuba umntwana uxhatshazwa ngamaphupha awonayo, ngaba abazali kufuneka babe nesineke. I-psyche yabantwana banelisekile, bazinzile, bayayikhumbula loo maphupha ayesolisa ixesha elide kwaye soyika ukuba baya kubuya.
Zama:
- Ukuze ube kufuphi nomntwana oyikayikayo, ukumthabatha ezandleni zakhe, ukumnyanzela kuye.
- Gcoba uze ulinde ade alele.
- Mamela ibali ukuba wayekwesaba kakhulu kwaye wahlula ukwesaba nomntwana.
Ukuba imeko ezinjalo zibandakanyekile, kufuneka ubhale phantsi amaphupha omntwana uze uphendule kwengqondo yengqondo yomntwana.