Kwaye, kunzima kakhulu ukuba umntwana aqonde kwaye avume ukuba bonke abazali abaza kuthanda baya kuthanda omnye umntu, ngaphandle kwakhe. Mhlawumbi akazange abathande? Mhlawumbi waziphatha kakubi? Kuthekani kuthi xa banika abantu abangabaziyo okanye "ikhaya" labakhohlakeleyo, apho, njengoko bevelele, babhekisela abantwana abangenasidingo? Kuthekani ukuba ngoku akayimfuneko? Imibuzo enjalo ivela entloko yomntwana ongenakulungele ukubonakala komzalwana okanye udade.
Kodwa ukuba uxinzelelo olunxulumene nokuzaliswa azinakuphetshwa, ngoko lunokuncitshiswa ngamaxesha amaninzi.
Ukulungiselela umhlaba.
Thetha malunga nokubonakala kweso sibini okanye abantwana abasemva kukuqala ukuqala ngaphambi kokukhulelwa. Kwimeko nayiphi na into, musa ukuwayeka emva kokukhawuleza ukuba kufuneka uchaze ukuba, umama unaphi isisu esikhulu kangaka.
Tshela umntwana wakho malunga nezicwangciso zakho, malunga nokuba ubomi bakho buya kutshintsha njani, ukuba uya kuba ngumntu ophezulu kwaye uya kuba noxanduva. Kubalulekile ukuba ungagqithisi imibala kwaye ungakhohlisi umntwana. Musa ukuthembisa ukuba umntwana uya kudlala naye kwaye abe ngumhlobo obalaseleyo. Mhlawumbi kuya kuthi, kodwa kungekudala. Sitshele malunga nendlela eya kukhula ngayo kwisisu somama, ukuba uza kuzalelwa njani, kwaye uza kujongwa njani.
Ngethuba lokukhulelwa, mema umntwana ukuba aphulaphule indlela umzalwana okanye udade wakhe ozayo uza kukhaba ngayo esiswini. Mnike uncedo ekukhetheni igama, amathoyizi, iimpahla zentsana.
Ungalibali ukutsho ukuba uyamthanda kwaye akayi kukuyeka ukuthanda, nokuba ngaba unabantwana abaninzi. Kubalulekile ukuba umntwana uyazi ngokuqinisekileyo njengegama lakhe.
Ukuba umntwana ukhangele ngokukhawuleza nokubonakala komdlali, musa ukugxininisa ukuba kwisibini kwesibini utshintshe uluvo lwakhe ngalo. Ngomonde nothando, qalisa ukuthetha malunga nosana, malunga nokuba uya kukhula njani aze amthande umdala, yiziphi iingenelo ozibonayo ekubeni nosapho kunye nabantwana abaninzi. Emva kwexesha, umntwana uya kuxolelana kunye nokuba akukho phantse kwaye uyayeka ukuphendula ngokukhawuleza.
Kwixesha elithile ngaphambi kokuba uye esibhedlela, khuluma nomntwana wakho malunga nokuhlukana kwakho. Yithi uza kubuya nomntwana omtsha, ukuba unokutyelelwa, kodwa ekhaya uya kuhlala eyona nto ephambili kwaye kuya kufuneka ancede abadala.
Zama ukukhathalela umntwana ngale nxaxheba entsha yomdala, ejongene nayo.
Xa ubuyela ekhaya kunye nosana, musa ukugxotha umntwana omdala. Unomdla kwaye unomona, ngoko iimvakalelo zakhe kufuneka zizaliseke. Mcebise malunga nendlela yokuziphatha ngayo nosana, into ongayenza kunye noko kungenjalo, indlela yokuthetha. Emva koko umbonise umntwana, vumela lo mhlobo kuqala ukuba kwenzeke ngokukhawuleza. Umntwana ophezulu makaqinisekise ukuba umntwana akanakunceda kwaye ufuna ukugcinwa, njengoko uthe.
Ukuba umntwana ukhulu ngokwaneleyo, ungamnika umntwana ezandleni zakhe, kodwa kubalulekile ukuthatha ingqalelo.
Ukuxolela umntwana omdala ukunceda ekunyamekeleni omncinci, kodwa ungagqithisi. Kumele kube ngumdlalo, uncedo lokuzithandela, kungekho uxanduva. Ngako oko, cela uncedo kwiimeko ezilula kwaye ezinomdla. Makuye umntwana omdala angenise i-diaper okanye i-diaper, uncede ukhethe isinkwa okanye iisokisi, hamba nawe ukuhamba okanye ubonise umntwana wakho itekisi. Kodwa akafanele ahlambe i-diaper, upheke umxube okanye uhlambe umntwana, nangona kubonakala kuwe ukuba iminyaka sele ikuvumela ukuba uyenze.
Tshela umntwana okhulileyo ukuba uhlakaniphile kwaye unamandla kangakanani xa uthelekiswa nomntwana. Ukunikezela ukufundisa umntwana ukuba abambe iqhosha, ukuphulaphula iingoma okanye iingoma. Vumela umntwana omdala amxelele ngehlabathi apho umntwana angene khona, kuba yena ngokwakhe akakwazi nto nto.
Kungenzeka ukuba umntwana okhulileyo uya kubantwana ngokubonakala komncinci. Ukusebenza kweSikolo kunokwehla, ixesha elide elilibalekileyo lingabonakala. Abantwana be-school school agele ngokukhawuleza belahlekelwa izakhono zabo zokuhlambulula, inkulumo iba njengokuba ubuye unyaka okanye amabini edlulileyo. Oku okwethutyana kwaye oku kuqhelekileyo. Ngokuqinisekileyo, akufanele ufune ukuziphatha ngendlela enjalo, kodwa akufanele umgxeke. Zama nje ukuqinisekisa ukuba ingqalelo yakho yanele wonke umntu. Ngezihlandlo ezinjalo kulungile ukutsala utata, oomkhulu kunye nogogo abanokuphazamisa umntwana omdala kwaye mhlawumbi bamphange ngezipho ezingenakulungiswa.
Xa abantwana bekhula beqala ukuthetha, kuya kuba neengxabano. Oku akunakuphetshwa, kwaye kufuneka ulungele oku. Zama ukuhlwaya umdala nje ngokuba uphezulu kwaye akakhuseli omncinci nje ngokuba uncinci. Yabelana kwaye ulawule kwaye ukhuthaze kwisiqingatha, njengamathoyizi, i-candy, ingqalelo kunye nothando lwakho. Zama ukufumana igama elincinci kubo bonke, nangona umntu engafanelekanga. Musa ukukhuthaza ukhuphiswano kwaye uzama ukuxabana. Ngelo xesha, kungcono ukungaphazamisi abantwana ukusuka kwiminyaka ethile, kufuneka bafunde ukufumana ubudlelwane ngokwabo.
Kwintsapho apho wonke umntu eshukunyiswa uthando, apho abantwana banethemba lokuvalelwa komzali, umona awuncinci kwaye uyadlula ngokukhawuleza. Esi siqinisekiso esiyinhloko soxolo noxolo.