Ziziphi iindidi zentlalo-yengqondo yabantwana abasuka kwiintsapho ezihlelelekileyo? Okokuqala, kuya kuba nengqiqo ukuqwalasela ukuba zeziphi iindwendwe ezithathwa njengento engathandekiyo. Inkolelo yesininzi kukuba xa siva inqaku elithi "intsapho engafanelekanga," into yokuqala efika engqondweni yethu kukuba ukungabi nemali, okunye esikubonayo kukuphazamiseka. Enyanisweni, oku akunjalo. Kwizengqondo, iintsapho ezihlelelekileyo zibizwa ngokuba yi-disharmonious, apho iingcamango ziintsapho, apho ubudlelwane obuvumelanayo phakathi kwabazali nabantwana bephulwa. Ngamanye amagama - imfundo engaqondakaliyo, ukunganeliseki ukwaneliseka kwezidingo ezingundoqo zengqondo kunye nokuziphatha komntwana, isimo sengqondo esingalunganga kunye nokukhuliswa. Yonke le nto ayishiyikanga kwaye ingathintela umntwana ngendlela eyona nto. Kulungile, kuxhomekeke kuhlobo lwentsebenziswano edibeneyo, esiyiqwalasela ngoku ngakumbi iinkcukacha.
Imfundo ye-disharmonious yezona ziqhelekileyo ishiywa. Kule meko, akukho nkathalo kunye nokunakekelwa, njengokuba kunjalo, umntwana akajongwanga kwaye akanomdla ebomini bakhe, ukuthini ukuthetha ngothando olunothando noluthando, ingqwalasela. Ngokuqhelekileyo abo bangabantwana abavela kwiintsapho ezifumana imali engaphantsi. Ngokuqhelekileyo azinakulungiswa kakuhle, angasondli, aswelekanga kuphela iimfuno ezingokwengqondo, ezifana nesithando nothando, kodwa kwaneliseko olwaneliseko, njengokutya, ukulala, ukhuseleko, ukucoceka, njl njl.
Ngoko ke, ukuziphatha okuphambene nomntu owedlulileyo kuya kuba kukungathinteli, oko kukunyamekela. Abazali baphonononge zonke iinyawo zomntwana, babeke izimvo zabo, izinto zabo eziphambili kunye neengcamango zabo, ukuseka imiqathango engapheliyo, ngenxa yokwephulwa komthetho. Kule meko, ukwaneliseka ngokupheleleyo kwezidingo ezisisiseko, kodwa ulungelelwano lwamagama olungalunganga kunye nenani elikhulu leengxaki zengqondo. Ukuqwalasela iimvakalelo, ukungena rhoqo kwisithuba sengqondo somntu, ukugxilwa kweengcamango nezindinganiso zikhokelela ekufundeni umntwana ukuba acinge ngokuzimeleyo, izenzo zakhe zibonakala zingumzekelo wezenzo zabazali bakhe. Kukho ukucaphukisa kulo mbandela, umsindo oqokelelweyo, imfuno yokuhlukana nabazali, ukufumana indawo yazo. Ukuvalwa kwexesha elide kukukhokelela entukuthelweni, iingcamango ezinjenge "kutheni wonke umntu unokukwazi, kodwa andiyi." Ngokufanayo, abantwana balolu hlobo bahleka baze bahlekwa ngabanye, apho umntwana angayithumela khona ityala kubazali aze abathande ngenxa yokunyamekela okunjalo. Umntwana uyakhuthazeka kwaye angenakufikeleleka.
Enye yeentlobo zokungakhuselekanga kukunciphisa iintshukumo zabantwana kungekho phantsi kwabazali, kodwa phantsi kohlobo oluthile lokuziphatha okanye indlela yokuphila. Kwaba bantwana, ihlala ixhomekeke ityala elihle kwaye likholisa uMama noTata, nangona kaninzi kuninzi oku kwenzeka kwiintsapho ezingabodwa, xa omnye wabazali abasele bewuthatha ingqalelo yabo kumntwana, bambeka phakathi kwentsapho kwaye bamnike unonophelo olunzulu.
Uhlobo lolwalamano oluxhatshazwayo kwintsapho luhlala lugxothwa ngumoya. Akunakutsholwa ukuba umntwana onjalo akaxhaswanga kuzo zonke, njengokwimeko yokuqala ye-hypoopeak, esicinga ngathi. Apha, abazali banokunika umntwana izinto zonke eziyimfuneko, bamnike izipho baze bamnyamekele. Kodwa, ukuba uchane ngakumbi, ukuzenza. Emva koko, kwimeko yokuchaswa ngokomzwelo, umntwana uvakalelwa kukuba akafuneki, ukungabikho kwemvakalelo ekhokelo lwakhe, ngoko kuyimfuneko ukuba akhule. Abazali banokunika umntwana ukutya, amathoyizi, iimpahla, zonke izinto eziyimfuneko kuye ngemali, kodwa angabonisi uthando kunye nomusa, ngakumbi kulo mzekelo umntwana ungumthwalo, umthwalo kubazali bakhe. Ukukhanyela ngokomzwelo kufihliwe, ngamanye amaxesha nabazali baqiqa phambi kwabo. Ulwalamano olunjalo lwama-disharmonous lufumaneka rhoqo kwiimeko zokungafunanga ukukhulelwa.
Okubi kakhulu, mhlawumbi, uhlobo olunzima kakhulu lokuphazamiseka kwintlupheko kwintsapho. Ukuba abazali babonisa ubundlobongela ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo kumntwana, akukho nto inokuthi umntwana onjalo uya kuba neengxaki ezinzulu zengqondo, ubunzima, kodwa kwezinye iimeko - ukuphambuka kwengqondo. Abantwana bangakwazi ukuziphatha ngendlela yabazali babo ngale ndlela, okanye bambethe umntwana ngenxa yokubandezeleka kwabo ngokwabo. Ubundlobongela obuqhubekayo emagqabini amancinci bufaka ubungqina bokugatywa kwengqondo komzali, kunye nokuphathwa kogonyamelo kwengqondo.
Ngaphandle koko, ukungabi nandaba nokukhohlakala kunokuba khona kwintsapho. Umntwana kulo mzekelo ukhula wedwa, uhlala kwelinye ihlabathi, kwintsapho enjalo bonke "abanandaba" ngenxa yeemfuno zomnye nomnye.
Ndingayichaza njani inkcazo yentlalo-yengqondo yabantwana kwiintsapho ezihlelelekileyo? Siyabona ukuba akukho nto enhle kulo, kwaye siqwalasele iimeko eziqhelekileyo zentsebenziswano edibeneyo kwiintsapho, siyabagweba ngabazali. Umntwana ngumthwalo omkhulu kunye nomsebenzi, kuyimfuneko ukuba uyinyamekele ngokupheleleyo, umnike uthando nothando, okanye uya kukhula ngokwengqondo. Musa ukuphinda uphoso iimpazamo zabanye, hlalutya loo matyala kwaye unakekele abantwana bakho ngendlela engcono kubo.
Musa ukunyanzeliswa ngotywala kwaye uncede abanye abasondeleyo. Mhlawumbi kwixesha elizayo, ngemizamo ehlangeneyo, siya kukwazi ukunqoba le ngxaki.