Indlela yokufunda ukubonisa umlingiswa?

Abantu abaninzi banengxaki yezinto ezibizwa ngokuba yi-spinelessness. Ukungabikho koqinileyo kuya kubakhokelela kwiinkalo ezininzi. Kodwa, ngelishwa, ukufunda ukubonisa umlingani akulula. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba wenza umgudu kwaye usebenze ngokwakho, kunokwenzeka ukuba ube namandla-unqwenela kwaye ube namandla kumntu.


Wonke umntu uya kukuthanda

Abantu abaninzi abanakukwazi ukusebenzisa amandla abo kunye nomlingiso wabo ngenxa yokuba besoyika ukucaphukisa nokucaphukisa abanye. Ewe-ke, akukho mntu ufuna ukukwenza ngokugqithiseleyo, kodwa kubantu abanjalo, le meko isasazeka ngokupheleleyo nakweyiphi na imeko. Umzekelo, umntu akavumelekanga ukuba atshintshe kwi-minibus, kodwa akayi kuthetha ngaye, ukuze angaphosisi umqhubi, akafumananga kubi. Enyanisweni, le mpawu iba yiphumo ngqo kwiinkomfa zezingane. Ukuba abantwana babengathandwa ngabaontanga babo, wayehlala ezama ukukholisa abo kwaye azama ukwenza nantoni na eyenza abantwana bangabikho. Kungenxa yoko, xa beba badala, abantu abanjalo bayaqhubeka nokusebenzisa lo mzekelo wokuziphatha, nangona kungalunganga. Ukuba uyaqonda ukuba awukwazi ukubonisa umlingisi wakho kwaye ungabonakalisi umbono ngenxa yokuba awufuni ukucaphukisa abanye, ngoko kufuneka uguquke ngokukhawuleza isimo sengqondo sakho kwimeko.

Okokuqala, u-vanykto akayi kukhawuleza aze afunge. Umzekelo, ukuba awuzange unike utshintsho, unokukhumbuza ngokukhuselekileyo umqhubi malunga nalo, kwaye ungayiphosi kuye. Khumbula ukuba ngamnye wethu unembopheleleko yethu kwaye ukuba awuzenzi kakuhle ngokwaneleyo, ngoko unokukhalaza. Ngako-ke, unelungelo elifanayo kunye nokunye nabanye abantu. I-Tembolee, ukuba umntu unelisekile kwaye uyaqhelekileyo, akaze athathe isicelo sakho somngeni okanye ukuthuka. Ewe, kwimeko xa uqala umthwalo ekuphenduleni, khumbula into enye: akusiyo into embi, ngumdlali wakho obi.

Kwiimeko apho umntu eqonda ukuba unetyala lento ethile, kodwa yonke into iqala ukuhlaselwa, ukuziphatha kwakhe kuthetha kuphela kwiinkqubo zangaphakathi ezingenakunqoba, kwaye ngoku uyazifakazela ngeendleko zabanye abantu. Ngaphezu koko, musa ukulibala ukuba abantu abanakukwazi ukuvela kuthi bakhuphe iiyure ezingamashumi amabini anesine ngosuku. Nangona abantu abasondeleyo ngamaxesha ngamaxesha bayathukuthela baze bacasuke, kodwa asiyiqondi ukuba sisondele entliziyweni, kuba siyazi ngamacala abo angalunganga. Kodwa nabanye abantu, siyalibala ngalo. Ngoko, endaweni yokuzithoba phantsi kwamehlo akho kunye naluphi na ukugwenxa okugwenxa kuwe ukukholelwa ukuba ezimbi zilungile, cinga ngabachasi bakho. Ukuba umqhubi we-minibus uqala ukuphakamisa izwi le-Navas, kuthetha ukuba yena, okokuqala, uyazithukuthelela. Kwaye ngendlela, akufuneki ukuba ngumntu ombi. Mhlawumbi kwakukuphela kokungaphumeleli okanye into ethile engafanelekanga ebomini bakhe. Le ndoda ingayiqonda ngendlela yakhe, kodwa, akukho mfuneko ukuba kuyimfuneko ngenxa yeengxaki zakhe ukuba ziqale into into yokuzigweba, ukuxutywa kwikhoneni kwaye uzame ngandlela-thile ukuthethelela lo mntu. Emva kwayo yonke into, nokuba yintoni eyiyo, akanalo ilungelo lokuthetha ngokucacileyo nomntu ohluke ngokupheleleyo, owambuza umbuzo ochanekileyo kunye ochanekileyo. Ukuba ukhokelwa ngulo hlobo lweengcamango kuyo nayiphi na imeko yolu hlobo, ngoko kwixesha uya kuqonda ukuba uyeke ukuhlalisa kwaye uhlawule amehlo akho. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, uya kufunda ukuba ungesabi ngombono womnye umntu, kuba ngokwenene ungumntu kwaye akukho mntu unako kwaye akufanele abe ngumgca.

Strahpoteri

Ngokuqhelekileyo abantu bayesaba into eyongezelelweyo ukuze badikibala, ukuze bangalahlekelwa ngumntu osondeleyo nothando. Kwaye xa ufuna ukubonisa umlingiswa wakho, ngokuthethelekileyo, ukubetha intonga etafileni, umntu uyayeka kwaye azenzele ukuba uyavumelana nayo yonke into. Kwimeko enjalo, umntu unokuthetha ngokungathandabuzekiyo into enye kuphela: ukuba umntu uphatha kakubi ukubonakaliswa komlingiswa, ngoko, kunye naye, into ephosakeleyo. Kule meko, abantu abangafuni ukubonisa umlingiswa bayesaba ukuba ngumsindo okanye ukugwenxa. Zombini zombini aqhelekanga. Ukuba umntu wakho othandekayo okanye umntu osondeleyo uqalisiwe ukusuka kwisiqingatha-sithuba, emva kokuva ukuchaswa, ngoko ke unengxaki ezithile kwi-psyche. Abantu abaxhamlileyo banqwenela ukunqanda abo bathathaka. Kwaye ubuthathaka, ngokuqhelekileyo, bathanda. Yingakho umntu onjalo ezama ukubonakalisa umlingiswa wakhe, ngelixesha elifanayo ngokungafuni ukubonisa umlingiswa womntu wesibini. Ukuba uyaqonda ukuba imeko yakho iqhubeka ngokuchanekileyo, kufuneka ufunde ukuzinyathela kwaye uvikele umbono wakho. Inyaniso kukuba ngokukunqanda, umntu uninzi uziva ezandleni zakhe amandla phezu kobomi bakho. Kwaye ukukwazi ukuvakalelwa kunokuba kunikwe abantu abanengqondo efanelekileyo kunye neengcamango zehlabathi. Kwimeko yethu, umntu ngumntu ophethe i-manipulator kunye nomtyholi. Ngoko ke, ukuba ufumana amandla apheleleyo, kuya kuba nzima kakhulu ukuba ubaleke kuwo, okanye kungenakwenzeka. Ngoko kufuneka uqalise ngokukhawuleza ukukhusela uluvo lwakho kwaye ujonge ukuphendula komntu. Ukuba uthe wenza ngokufanelekileyo ngokwaneleyo kwaye akaqali ukuwela ebudeni ngenxa yokuziphatha kwakho, mhlawumbi, ngezenzo zakhe wakuchukumisa ukubonakalisa umlingiswa kwaye ngoku umphefumlo uyavuya kwimiphumo ayifumanayo. Kodwa xa umntu eqala ukuthukuthela , ukukhala ukuba uya kukushiya kwaye ngokuqhelekileyo aphile kunye nokukhanya, ukuba awuyivali, kufuneka uqikelele ngokucacileyo malunga nobuphi ubudlelwane obuya kubakho. Thatha, ungesabi ukuxelela umntu othandayo oko ucingayo. fuck, ithetha, ubudlelwane abanalo ikusasa. Kwaye akunandaba, wayesaba ukrakra okanye intukuthelo yakhe. Ukungakwazi ukugxekwa kunye nomnqweno wokuhlala ukhubekiso kuzo zonke azikhozona zihlandlo ezibalulekileyo ezinokukunceda ubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu baqiniswe kwaye baphuhliswe.

Enyanisweni, asivumelekanga ukuba sibonakalise umlingisi: nokuba yeyethu, okanye abo basingqongileyo kwaye badlale indima ebalulekileyo ebomini bethu. Ngoko ke, akufanele usho ukuthi ungumuntu ongenamntu ongenakuguqula nantoni na. Enyanisweni, yonke into isezandleni zakho. Ngoko ke, soloko uzama ukukhumbula ukuba ubudlelwane obuqhelekileyo bwakhiwe kwi nyaniso. Umhlobo omhle, umntu onothando, umzali oqhelekileyo uya kuhlala ethetha oko akucingayo aze agxeke apho kuyimfuneko. Ekugqibeleni, umntu owaneleyo kunye onokuzithoba uya kwamkela ngokugxeka kwaye akayi kuhlaziywa. Ngoko ke ungesabi ukubonisa uluvo lwakho kwaye wenze njengoko ubona kufanelekile. Ukuba ubona ukusabela okungafanelekanga ekuziphatheni kwakho, khumbula ukuba ingxaki ilapha kula bantu, kungekhona kuwe.